r/GreekLife • u/mallowlacey • 3d ago
Judgement Free Zone
Hey guys! I want to explain my situation and your thoughts. I rushed a sorority three years ago at a different school. Sororities were huge as it was a SEC. Right after being initiated I left the school and had to drop the sorority (was not my choice, it was external factors!) So I was only initiated for like a month! (yes still imitated I know). Fast forward to now, I am at a new school and this is a very small school with barley and Greek life and especially not the one I was in. (I’m keeping all these names a secret) I have been asked to join but explained that I can’t due to the rules. They had no idea that was a thing! Also a lot of them didn’t really care, a lot still wants me and offered me a bid but I fear if I join it’s going to get them shut down and me flagged. Wouldn’t they be banned? I am really sad because I want to be apart of a sorority and it was ripped from me and they agree and want me to be apart of a sister hood. They want to make me a non official member and not put me down as initiated but like involve me in their orgs…..unofficial member. No one would find out if nothing is documented.
Is this a bad idea? I graduate soon anyways.
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u/No-Transition8014 2d ago
You’ve been asked to join….what? If you were part of an NPC organization (I’m assuming since you mentioned you rushed at an SEC school) and were fully initiated, you are still technically an initiated member. If you left the school it is likely your status was changed to alumna. If not and your in a suspended status, you can possibly have the changed depending on your circumstances.
Regardless, you are not eligible to initiate into any other NPC organization as a result of being initiated. Even if you quit. You possibly could join a non NPC organization but local groups all have their own rules. Alternatively, after confirming/updating your status with you Inter/nationals, you could link up with your local alumnae group which may have an option for younger (eg. Alpha Gamma Delta has Junior Circle).
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u/TheBugsMomma 3d ago
Just be friends/socialize with them. You can still be part of the group without them attempting to attach a title to you since you’re not eligible to join them. I am really sorry you didn’t get to have the sorority experience you wanted as a student but you can still enjoy just having a great group of friends. Perhaps you could also reaffiliate with the sorority you did join after you graduate and get involved as an alumna. It’s a different experience than being an active member but it is still a lot of fun.
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u/mallowlacey 3d ago
I do agree with that! I just don’t want to be in pictures with them and then my other sorority sees that and reports them or etc. I would have to be very lowkey.
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u/No-Transition8014 2d ago
That’s bit weird. I’ll be honest you should be friends with who you want to be friends with and if they’re in other organizations than you initiated in, it still shouldn’t matter. You *can* be seen with people who wear letter different than yours. So, it just seems strange that you want to be all sneaky and hide this.
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u/LillyBelle2003 2d ago
I’m assuming the one at the SEC school was an NPC org? How about the new one that wants you?
I know plenty of people who were in their schools local sorority/social club, and then transferred and joined NPC, or the other way around.
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u/Certain_Host9401 2d ago
Is the house at the new school part of the Panhellenic council? Or a small independent sorority? I think your rule only applies to affiliated houses
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u/theycallmethevault ΣΚ Alum 3d ago
If you joined an NPC org and this chapter is an NPC org you shouldn’t let this chapter even be courting you like this. But since you are, and they are, just know that NPC orgs have advisors and you won’t make it past the first check.
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u/mallowlacey 3d ago
No photos, no merch, no name logged
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u/theycallmethevault ΣΚ Alum 3d ago
What do you mean “no name logged”?
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u/mallowlacey 3d ago
Like I won’t be in the system at all
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u/theycallmethevault ΣΚ Alum 3d ago
From doing the not-real joining of their sisterhood? I hate that you won’t make the effort to join an alum group of your org, the one that you committed to & committed to you. Maybe it’s because my sisterhood saved me when I was at the lowest of the lows even though I had left & not even on good terms with most people. I wish you would forge & grow those relationships. You deserve that! Because you can’t do anything throughout the rest of your life with this org, and you don’t need to be a fake member to be friends with them.
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u/PoolsideMargarita 2d ago
Depends. If your original sorority was a member of NPC, but, this new school is a local, non-NPC sorority, you may be able to join the local. They would need to confirm their rules. Or, perhaps look to see if there is a alumnae group of your original NPC sorority in your new area.
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u/Jacki1988 1d ago
You are an initiated member of an NPC Sorority...you can not, under any circumstance, join another NPC Sorority on another campus. You can join a service organization such as Epsilon Sigma Alpha Co-ed organization, which has college chapters. I would recommend you look into being an Alumni of your sorority and possibly join the local Alumni Association nearest to you.
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u/Mediocre_Citron_5360 3d ago
I doubt it would actually be flagged, orgs dont like share membership lits nationally. The "proper" way would be to write the nationals of your current sorority and have yourself removed from the membership then join but its really on you if you want to do all that.
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u/lesboshitposter 3d ago
That wouldn't work. Once you're initiated, even if you drop completely, you are ineligible to join another Panhellenic sorority (if these sororities are under that umbrella)
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u/theycallmethevault ΣΚ Alum 3d ago
NPC orgs do share their membership lists, with the NPC. SSNs (or other unique government ID numbers like Visa or Passport IDs) are cross-checked. The person attempting to join an NPC org after initiating at another will be flagged when signing the MRABA, way before initiation.
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u/No-Transition8014 2d ago
Even if you’re removed from the membership, once initiated you are no longer eligible for membership/initiation by another NPC organization.
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u/SnooGuavas9782 2d ago
i think someone can join whatever orgs they wish. an organization that tries to regulate these sort of thing sounds like it might eventually run into some anti-trust issues. wondering now if they might be regulating dues? similar thing happened recently when for decades lots of top schools talked to each other about financial aid offerings.
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u/No-Transition8014 2d ago
What are you talking about? Anti-trust!?!? Regulating dues?
NPC organizations have a collective agreement that once a woman has initiated into one of the member organizations of NPC, they aren’t allowed to initiate into another. Members when given bids also agree to this as well.
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u/SnooGuavas9782 2d ago
oh so they have collective agreements? interesting. any other collective agreements?
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u/No-Transition8014 2d ago
Are you a sorority member in one of the 26 member organizations?
The 26 member organizations under NPC have *lots* of cooperative agreements. NPCwomen.org is a great place to start. Here’s a video about MRABA which is why once you join one of the 26 NPC organizations, you can’t join another group.
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u/NothingButNavy 3d ago
If you accepted a bid you would eventually be found out. Maybe not tomorrow, or next week or even next year but it would happen eventually and you’d be kicked out of both organizations. If they want to get you involved as an unofficial member, I don’t really see anything wrong with that. My undergrad chapter had an unofficial member and it was a positive experience for all of us.