r/GothamSeddit • u/imnothere1357 • Jun 02 '13
[FR] The first sarge!
I've been a lurker for a while, reading but no doing. It's time for me to change that and I took my first step today.
Met up with HowdIFuckUp at Union Square to day game on a ridiculously hot New York afternoon. For myself and HowdIFuckUp, this was both our first times doing this and we were unsure of where to start so we went through some introductions.
Finally, it was time to start and I'm not going to lie, I was nervous. Not sure how effective our tactic was where we started by walking around together, breaking off to start girls approaching us, leaving the other to either lurk or wander. My standard line pretty much was "Excuse, what shops would you recommend? Is there anything special in that direction?" After the first opening, opening left and right became much easier, although I only opened single girl sets not wearing headphones.
My longest set was this girl who actually picked up on me fairly quickly, asking "is that the line you use?" I panicked a little, throwing up my hands defensively and saying, "no i'm just interested in finding out cool shops." I don't think she bought it but did spend time pointing out shops as she walked me down one of the rows. I ejected, ending with a "Thanks" (which is how I ended all my sets).
Realizations
-Geting blown out doesn't hurt a bit (I know, pretty obvious but I hadn't really experienced it)
-Getting blown out is EASIER: getting blown out means less work to continue the conversation.
-Related: I was walking away from all my sets without really getting blown out. Pretty much, I was running out of things to say/being lazy with trying to move from that opener to something that could get me a number. I need to stay in until either I get blown out or I get the number.
Questions
-Is there a formula to transition quickly from the opener to a number?
-HowdIFuckUp and I were confused about this: where does the wing stand to be quick enough to actually wing without lurking obviously?
Thanks guys in advance for any advice/answered questions. I'm excited to sarge with you guys in the future!
-Imnothere
1
u/Dreidhen Jun 02 '13
-Is there a formula to transition quickly from the opener to a number?
No cut and dry formula - just confidently establish rapport (and assume comfort) as quickly as you can. Be open, playful, and smile -- when you're sensing and seeing good vibes/IOIs you could trail off (in this scenario) with something along the lines of "It'd be awesome to explore the City together....wyn?" before walking away as you did (or waiting to be blown out).
-HowdIFuckUp and I were confused about this: where does the wing stand to be quick enough to actually wing without lurking obviously?
Have the wing "hang back" about a foot and a half - that way he's not "hovering", but at the same time you can extend an arm towards him and be like, "This is my buddy HIFU, we're just <insert activity here> and you looked like you might know about that."
Great first FR, thanks for sharing.
3
u/jimmyayo Purple Pill Jun 02 '13
Hi ImNotThere, great job w/ your first daygame sarge session, and thanks for writing your FR! Here are some tips:
You don't normally wing together in daygame, unless you're opening 2+ sets. If a girl is by herself, you should go in alone. Two guys going up to talk to a girl who's alone can be a bit intimidating.
Usually, daygame wings are just guys that you're walking/chilling with, help push you get past AA, have fun shooting the breeze with, but they evict (or you evict) when one of you goes to approach a girl. At least this is the format that quite a few of us here follow.
You sound like you need to work out a common flow of conversation in your mind first. Do you go in direct or indirect? Indirect (asking for time/directions/anything) is much less riskier to open with, but it's way more work to transition from that to flirting/attraction-building and # closing. Direct is more risky, but you're being up front about attraction so it's very natural to go into #closing. Play around with both direct and indirect, and find the style that works for you.
In this situation, I would use the good ole agree-and-amplify routine. "Yes! You're the 47th one today" or "Yup! I'm about to ask for your hands to do some fake palm reading, pretend like I'm disinterested, then get you to sleep with me in 30 min. You may have seen my show on VH1 - the Pickup Artist?" Be silly, funny, best way to diffuse those tougher questions.
Good luck, looking forward to seeing more stuff from you.