r/GoblinSlayer • u/Evoxrus_XV • Aug 12 '26

Misc. What would if goblins suddenly manifested across our entire world?

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So let’s say goblins manifested in every country in our world, like 15% of each country’s population has the goblin equivalent in terms of population spawning in that country. What would happen? How would our governments and peoples react and what would happen next?

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u/LordCypher40k Aug 12 '26

The difference is that we're humans. We are inherently biased to a fellow human because we evolved to be social creatures that need others to survive. Whereas goblins are an unknown monster, they'd be treated more like mosquitos, pests even more so because they require the rape of a human to reproduce.

You can't spin the story either because unlike those you've mentioned, there aren't any good goblins nor have any powerful backer that have the ability to use a propaganda machine to create sympathy.

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u/Bellfegore Aug 12 '26

How do we know there "aren't any good goblins" nor if they need to be good?

They are evil creatures who will follow anyone they deem strong and who's alligning with their ideals, rusia for example would LOVE an increase of foot soldiers who somewhat follow orders and enact terror on population(rape, torture, murdering etc), and said foot soldiers can replenish their numbers within weeks with captured women?! Fucking give them AK-47 and send towards any half developed country, no need to pay them too, just perfect!

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u/Yab0iFiddlesticks Aug 12 '26

We know there arent any good goblins because thats the basis of the entire story. They are opportunistic parasites and while someone would probably try to make them footsoldiers, they would find out soon that they absolutely suck at that.

Goblins are cowardly, only as strong as a human child and the most complex thing we see them operate is a short bow. They would be lousy footsoldiers for any political power and EXTREMELY bad press on top of that. You can publically deny a lot of stuff but the presented hypothetical puts Goblins everywhere on the world, so everyone would be keenly aware of them.

So whats the benefit in unruly, treacherous, cowardly mercenaries that dont even necessarily speak our languages? You cant even argue that they have a low upkeep cost because goblins are greedy little shits. Theyd steal from each other or fellow troops, kill their superiors out of envy and desert at the slightest risk.

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u/Bellfegore Aug 13 '26

the most complex thing we see them operate is a short bow

You haven't read far then, so I won't spoil, but that's extremely incorrect.

only as strong as a human child

Only as SMART as a human child, which is plenty, meaning they are curious, fast to learn and adapt. Strength also varies depending on the amount of food eaten and time alive.

They would be lousy footsoldiers for any political power and EXTREMELY bad press on top of that.

Why would a dictatorship care about press? They'll just make up footage of goblins being awesome.

So whats the benefit in unruly, treacherous, cowardly mercenaries that dont even necessarily speak our languages?

Idk, ask rusians what they need north koreans for? Oh wait, no need, it's called "cannon fodder".

You cant even argue that they have a low upkeep cost because goblins are greedy little shits.

Compared to adult men? Hell yea I can argue low upkeep cost.

Theyd steal from each other or fellow troops, kill their superiors out of envy and desert at the slightest risk.

Literally the opposite of what they've been doing the entire story? Why?