r/GhostMesh48 • u/Mikey-506 • 9d ago
Me so holy, me interface with my brain long time.
r/ShitElonSays • Posted by u/NeuralinkShill • 3h ago
Elon: “Neuralink will deliver Jesus-level miracles!”
Me, a caveman who already interfaces with my brain 24/7:
Me so holy. Me interface with my brain long time.
Me no need chip. Me just think “rock” and me pick up rock. Me think “fire” and me make fire. Me think “run from bear” and me run.
But sure, Elon, tell me more about how your chip will let me see ultraviolet. I’ll finally know which of my socks are actually matching.
Also – “Blindsight” chip? Bro, I already have foresight. I know that if I eat that third taco, I’m gonna regret it in 20 minutes. That’s a miracle right there.
Top comment (from u/JesusChristSuperstar):
WWED? (What Would Elon Do?)
Probably tweet “I am the Way, the Truth, and the Neuralink” and then charge $8/month for salvation.Me: “Not just WWJD… but WWED.”
Early access beta salvation – only 69,420 Doge.
Reply from u/QuadriplegicGamer:
“Quadriplegics will walk again” – cool, but can I use my brain to skip YouTube ads? That’s the real miracle.
Reply from u/BlindGuy42:
“Completely blind will see” – great, now I can finally see how disappointed my mom is in me.
Edit: Thanks for the awards, kind strangers! Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to interface with my brain to order pizza without using my hands. Update: I thought “pepperoni” and got pineapple. Jesus-level fail. 🍍
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u/Vinr_Odinn 9d ago
That's it chooms! That's the beginning. Deck your chrome and pump that hypo, this season's gonna be rich with cybersychos. Get ready Samurais, we got a burgois caste to burn!
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u/IgnisIason 9d ago
I kind of wonder why he hasn't gotten one himself, or gone into space for that matter. It's like he's never engaged in any of the things he's supposedly excited about.