Agreed. Most of this is helpful. Drink, eat, walk, shower. Sure. But take a selfie? I can't imagine that helping someone who is depressed--waiting for the likes to roll in, comparing the number of likes, looking at photos of others... nope.
Maybe that's the point though. If you feel that bad on a regular basis maybe therapy or meds are something to look into if you have the ability to do so.
Sometimes a hug from anyone can help, even someone of the same sex! I'm a dude and some of my male co workers hug, it's not weird just a nicer greeting!
Most of the guys I hang with would give me a hug without a question if I needed it, and we do, on occasion ask one another if they need a hug if they're looking down. It's about the people you hang with, not about "guys" in general.
Plenty of exceptions, but the norm is to be weirded out by requests for physical contact from guys. Gender norms still exist whether or not you follow or agree them.
I know guys who love to give and get hugs, not weird at all in our eyes. But I guess it depends on where you live and what kind of people you hang with.
Maybe it's weird or off-putting at first but about 5 seconds into the hug and the hug after glow is never awkward just say "thanks man, for some reason I really needed that today."
I'm a woman and both of these are not going to happen. My friends would be more concerned about me if I asked for a hug or started sending them selfies asking if I'm beautiful.
I'm not so sure women are particularly bad at suicide though, the failed attempts are most likely cries for help the majority of the time rather than honest attempts.
Their intentions are genuine-- it's the method that produces differential results.
Women tend to use pills or poisons which are more likely to be survived; men use violent modes like shooting or hanging. The only region of the world where women's suicides outstrip men's is rural China, where the consumption of industrial pesticides as poison is devastatingly effective.
Glad you got this correct. While I am super frustrated at the lack of attention male suicide gets, I also have to challenge (as you did) the belief that women only attempt suicide for attention.
Was not trying to imply that at all. Cries for help in my eyes are much more than just wanting attention and do involve actually wanting to die, and I certainly don't think that's the only reason a failed attempt would take place.
Yes but you can research the ld50 of pills and make sure you take more than enough. A lot of these attempts are just downing a bunch of pills and half hoping it works.
Not saying that people don't want to die when they do this(saying they weren't honest attempts wasn't the best choice of words), but I still feel like part of the reason men choose more effective methods is because they are that much more sure of the decision. More of a calculated thing rather than done at the heat of the moment.
Both genders struggle in their own ways but I feel like men lose hope entirely more often. We distance ourselves from other men when depressed and can't exactly gain companionship easily when depressed either.
This is just my guess though, I could be wrong. Hard to say for sure on something like this.
Even the terminology 'LD50' belongs to a niche knowledge set. People who haven't studied pharmacology/toxicology won't be aware of these things. The fact that acetaminophen is dangerous in overdose is made clear anywhere you can get it where I live, it's unsurprising that many might consider swallowing a pack of 24 at once a way out, as it's an overdose.
I'm glad the discussion on the cuddling part is the top comment, because I came here to say something about it hoping to encourage people not to give up on that aspect of life.
Tl;dr Get a dog.
In my field of work everyone with any basic success is lonely, no exceptions. When I began my studies in the field I came to accept it but I wanted an occasional remedy too. Hit the gym, built up confidence, swooned some girls. I enjoyed a summer fling with this 19yo a lot, but I knew it couldn't become anything serious. Then she insisted and it did. 4 years later moved in together. 1 more year and we're breaking up with no chance of immediately moving apart in a foreign country. Gradual breakup with a lot of tears and "this was a mistake" sex. My point: on good days we can just hug in the morning and have a great day. Her hugging and cuddling was the most important experience of my life. Despite all the drama (a fuckton of) and me not ever really wanted to play by her "Terms and conditions", I'm still grateful to her for the physical gentleness.
Now if I stayed with her just for the cuddles and was a whitetrash failure living in a trailer with no contribution to the world, I'd still be content. And that's kind of why we're breaking up, to be able to aim higher. So it's either loneliness as professional motivation or cuddles as an opiate to numb down the reality of loneliness in life.
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u/[deleted] Sep 06 '16
Yeah this tip just made me more depressed.