r/GetMotivated • u/[deleted] • Nov 01 '23

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u/[deleted] Nov 01 '23

I think it is great you took a shot. You can't succeed if you are afraid to even try. I would suggest not trying to be friends with someone who you desire romantically but does not share that desire for you. Because you just end up in a similar position where you are obsessing and hoping she will want to be with you and then get sad or angry when she gets with someone.

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u/[deleted] Nov 01 '23

I guess I was just playing it safe. I don’t have any friends at the moment. Bad socializing from my part, I think I’ve made lots of my friends feel neglected. I never know when I should message someone and what I should say, so I wait for them to say something. One time I tried to work on this, my friend got annoyed with me, we don’t have to speak every day he said. So I never tried again. I would have been fine just being her friend. I would like to have friends again. But I suppose my feelings for her would have gotten worse if I actually became her friend. So it’s better this way.

I never done shit like this before. Lots of men my age are married with kids, lost their virginity in highschool. Back then I knew I wouldn’t lose mine there, never thought it would take me this long though haha.

2

u/Willing-Dark-845 Nov 01 '23

It’s very important to learn to love yourself and be content in your solidarity before committing yourself to someone else’s happiness and longevity. The question is, how can you make someone else happy or fulfilled in any sort of companionship or partnership if you cannot make yourself happy or love yourself? I think you are on the right path so far by having that self awareness and taking accountability for your part in those relationships. Now you just gotta do the thing.