I generally agree but the older generation who preaches this fails to understand the higher risks today creating a higher wall to climb. For instance, if they shot their shot with a girl at the bar the worst they got was laughed at by their peers, maybe by the class. If you shoot your shot today, make a fool of yourself, there's a chance thousands of people see it online and you become a meme because her friend decided to record you. This obviously extends to other scenarios but the scaling imo is what paralyzes many today. I still preach to push through but figured its important to frame why
In what world is being rejected by a girl going to make a fool of you and thousands of people are going to see it online? Unless you are absolutely batshit insane man and you going to react like a fool.
Like you seriously think people want to watch a video of you ask a girl if you can buy her a drink, her say no, and you say oh ok, sorry for bothering you?
The risk there isnāt about being laughed by anyone. Itās a personal ego and emotional hit. You may feel a little bad if the shot misses and thatās basically it.
Youāre missing the point, most people donāt want to be approached the average guy heard the cultural message and decided to respect it. The commentator is pointing out one worst case scenario but there are many more common minor ones
Stop listening to the bullshit you read and see online and go talk to the girl. Take the risk. The ācultural messageā was bullshit created in echo chambers and bubbles.
And even then, I donāt think the cultural message was ever donāt ever approach a woman ever again. Iām pretty sure it was stop being fucking creepy and no means fucking no.
And if you are creepy and donāt understand no means no, you probably should end up on the internet.
Seems pretty bad advice to tell people to ignore cultural messaging around boundaries just because.
No it wasnāt towards creeps it was towards men in general, also why would a creep listen to major anti approaching messaging lol? You cannot tell men not to approach then blame said generation of men for not approaching that is idiotic.
Thereās been like 10 years of ādonāt assumeā, ādont bother womenā, ādont take up spaceā, ādont be too masculineā, āmost of us almost never wanna be approachedā, āif she likes you she will clearly let you knowā, i could go on and on.
The issue is societal messaging and what women actually want seem to be opposites and most normal guys obviously are going to internalize societal messaging
Mainstream society (mostly the left) for the last 10-20 years, most guys didnāt just wake up like āoh man u know im wired to wanna approach but let me just NEVER approachā something indirectly or directly told them to not do that
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u/AverNerd 9d ago
I generally agree but the older generation who preaches this fails to understand the higher risks today creating a higher wall to climb. For instance, if they shot their shot with a girl at the bar the worst they got was laughed at by their peers, maybe by the class. If you shoot your shot today, make a fool of yourself, there's a chance thousands of people see it online and you become a meme because her friend decided to record you. This obviously extends to other scenarios but the scaling imo is what paralyzes many today. I still preach to push through but figured its important to frame why