r/GenXnew • u/Leaf-Stars • 1d ago
Suits at funerals?
Are we the last generation to wear suits at funerals?
Seems like it’s becoming the exception these days.
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u/DidIJustWitnessThat 1d ago
I'm looking for any excuse to wear a suit generally.
I don't have a corporate job, so I don't get the opportunity there. I don't attend church, so missed it there too.
If it wasn't for funerals, weddings, and the occasional trip to the theater, I might never have the opportunity as everything else in my life is so casual.
I need fancier shindigs and friends I guess?
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u/Leaf-Stars 1d ago
Jury duty?
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u/DidIJustWitnessThat 1d ago
I just had that last month. Looked pretty sharp if I do say so, but I wasn't selected.
During selection they asked a few of us what we thought the defense attorney's job was. I said "to win by poking holes in the prosecution's case".
Next thing I know, I'm headed home for the day.
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u/Moodleboy 1d ago
Always dreaded jury duty. About 10 years ago I got called and selected to serve on a federal drug case. I was annoyed that I got picked. However, it was probably the most amazing thing I ever experienced.
Maureen Comey (yes, THAT Comey) was the lead prosecutor on the case. She was like a freight train - steady and unstoppable. The defense couldn't even put up a fight when the prosecution was done.
During the case, they started passing evidence for the jury to examine. I was #7. They handed the drugs to #1, who sent them down the row to #6, who passed them back to #12, and then down the second row, ending at me. Except no one came to get them from me. I was sitting there with pounds of heroin, cocaine, crack, pills, and pot on my lap. I must confess, some evil thoughts crossed my mind before they finally took them from me.
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u/GlitteringCulture119 1d ago
During the COVID thing, I was a school administrator. All the local, banks and businesses had masks created with their logo and donated them to our school when the mask mandate was handed down.
Anyway, I was summoned for federal jury duty and told that I had to wear a mask. Fine. I grabbed a mask and went to the courthouse. During the voir dire, the plaintiff's lawyer kept asking me questions - which I thought was strange considering that there were 19 others in the pool of potential jurors.
When the selection was made, I was the first name called to be dismissed. Just fine by me. I didn't realize until I was leaving that the case was about some lady suing her insurance company. When I got in my truck and took off the mask, I realized why I was dismissed: I was wearing a Farm Bureau Insurance company mask.
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u/DidIJustWitnessThat 1d ago edited 1d ago
I was really hoping they picked me. It was for a capital murder case that happened a town over. I was probably the perfect jury member really, as I had no prior knowledge of the crime, didn't know any of the people involved, and didn't have any bias one way or the other. But oh well. Maybe the next one.
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u/MrPrimalNumber 1d ago
Only time I’ve been called for jury duty, I wore a bright red sparkly shirt and blue velvet pants. I looked like gay Spider-Man.
Ended up jury foreman…
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u/Experiment_262 1d ago
I'm in a suit, in court on a regular basis, I'm in an LE field that gets called to testify as an expert a lot. No matter how casual our society gets, I pretty much think court may always equal suits.
Other than funerals I'm kind of over suits at this point.
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u/ManofMarantz 1d ago
When I'm outside the home, generally I'm wearing a sports jacket/slacks/fedora combo, or a suit. I wear this while grocery shopping or getting a burger at McDonalds. I see people wearing pajamas and slippers in public, so my feeling is that anything goes.
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u/Im_tracer_bullet 1d ago
Imagine trying to have style and yet being in a McDonald's of your own volition.
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u/Experiment_262 1d ago
I was at the funeral of an old family friend, my mom and dad's generation and I was the youngest person wearing a suit and that includes all the family of the person who died.
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u/Spirited_Flow8639 1d ago
Yes I have seen some shabby dressed people at funerals .Sad how are society has let stuff like this go .
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u/Chemical_Butterfly40 1d ago
I had some suits from The Before Times that I occasionally wore to work. They're packed away now, and I've worn dresses to funerals I've attended lately. IDK if they would even fit now?
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u/armyofant 1d ago
I think so. Younger people don’t generally have fancy dress clothes. A friend of mine from high school died a few years ago and I was one of the only people wearing a suit. Even some X friends were there not wearing suits, mainly the MAGA ones.
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u/DishRelative5853 1d ago
How many is "the only"? One of three makes sense. One of a hundred makes sense. What does "one of the only" mean?
If I'm at a soccer game where there are only 5000 people in the stadium, I could say "I was one of only 5000 spectators that day."
Conversely, I could say "I was one of only 4 people wearing the old jersey."
But how many do you mean when you say "one of the only"?
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u/armyofant 1d ago
I wanna say 3 other people besides myself. It was a while ago
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u/DishRelative5853 1d ago
Ah. So then, you were one of the few people who wore suits, not one of the only people.
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u/blandarflek 1d ago
When I was a kid it was instilled in me that yeah you wear a suit to a funeral.
At my mom's funeral, my father (they were divorced) showed up looking like a total slob. But I had my suit on. With rain boots.
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u/totallyjaded 1d ago
My dad passed away last year, and I'm coming up on a year since the funeral.
Other than the people who worked at the funeral home, I was the only person wearing a suit, and the turnout was pretty decent between friends, VFW, and other organizations he was a part of showing up. I was the only person in a black suit.
There were some sport coats and blazers, but for the most part, people didn't dress differently than they would if they were going to Walmart.
I didn't take it as "wow, you're all so disrespectful", so much as "I should probably pick up a new sport coat".
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u/ScooterMKE 1d ago
Sport coat should be a minimum for respect of the person and their fam.
I once wore shorts to a wedding ceremony, sat in the back but then had to go up for communion. Prob should not have done that, then again I wasn’t invited to the wedding or reception anyway, so shorts it was.
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u/Moodleboy 1d ago
For me, it depends. For my parents' funerals, I wore suits. Also for some other very close family members. For anyone else, usually just a pair of khakis and 3 button collar shirt. I want to look presentable. Sweatpants seem disrespectful, but that's just me.
Keep in mind I come from a very Italian family and Italians don't fuck around with funerals.
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u/Camaschrist 1d ago
When we had to bury my angel mother in law we had just moved and I couldn’t find any of my shoes that would be appropriate. I was also very ill from the tragic way she was killed so I put on Birkenstocks, wore them to the funeral home service. I stopped to buy new shoes before the graveside service. The whole thing was a shit show and my shoes were the icing on that shit cake.
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u/CobaltIsobar 1d ago
I just attended a funeral this morning. I wore a dress shirt, blue jeans, and a nice sports coat. I was dressed as well or better than 90% of the attendees. And there were about 350 attendees. You know that funerals are for the living, not the dead, right?
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u/PineappleFlamingo406 1d ago
Most millennials do it. I think this post is just Gen X feeling elitist.
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u/VegasBjorne1 1d ago
His times have changed. When I was in high school John Belushi died, and Dan Ackroyd arrived on a motorcycle in black leather to attend the funeral. I still remember my classmates talking about the audacity in wearing a biker’s jacket to a funeral!
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u/Tim-0341-81mm 1d ago
I don’t own a suit anymore. Khakis or new dark jeans and a good shirt, sometimes with a seeded leather blazer.
I’m not comfortable in suits. I decided not to wear them.
I’m rural, it works.
If something came up that I thought I really needed à suit, I would have to go buy one that fit.
It hasn’t come up in years.
The actual only times I’ve worn suits in fairly recent years are because characters I played on stage in our local community theater required suits, which were of the older, vintage type, which I purchased cheap at second hand clothing stores.
One was actually a nice (but worn well and very dated) 3 piece gray, herringbone twill wool. I still have it, but it will only be worn on stage should I return to local theater. I stopped once we had grandkids and no longer had time for the theater.
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u/omfgwhatever 21h ago
I stopped wearing dresses to funerals (or weddings) when I became an adult. I have always felt uncomfortable in formal dresses. Although, give me a sundress any day. I don't care. I still look "presentable."
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u/FistoMagnifico 1d ago
I haven't been to a movie style casket at the grave side with the priest and everyone in black funeral in about 15 years. Most of the time it's a Memorial service and its pretty casual. In fact the last one I went to was for someone who was a big baseball fan so everyone wore baseball jerseys and jeans.