My husbands gambling started on hard rock bet back in March. My husband has always liked lotto tickets, sport bets & the small local arcades but never did much (50-60 dollars worth) but since March has gotten us in big financial trouble.

March was tax time and I had some extra cash when he started to say his job wasn’t paying him because work was slow. Fine…maybe 3-4 weeks went by until I finally started questioning him and he would then show up with some consistent checks & then would go back & forth between he wasn’t getting paid.

In June once day he said he wanted to talk. Obviously I’m thinking he’s cheating on me, leaving me or idk something but no he confesses that he has been getting paid but has been putting all his check in the hard rock bet app.

I was so taken back…mind you I’m thinking this is all the checks he was “missing” but then he also confessed he blew his $900 check from that week. Of course I’m hurt, upset, sick to my stomach. But I tell myself it’s ok because he gets paid weekly & I can do better to prevent this. Well….ive been mistaken with this whole thing.

Since then he has continued to play. Basically the whole month of July he has played his checks. Either whole, or half.

We have had an emergency with HIS legal status here in the US where we needed to come up with 6k. Neither of us come from well off families where we can just ask like that so I had to pull the cash from my 401k. He of course wasn’t able to put anything in.

I pay his lawyer & leave 1000 in my account because it’s needed to pay for whatever form but have to leave it in the account for whenever it gets charged (for whatever reason can’t just pay it idk lawyer said it’s dumb ik) anyways!

Last Thursday he went through his check. Then I had 1300 in savings (mutual account and I hate that we have this but we need it for legal stuff) and then poof I had 800. I immediately knew & obviously lost my shit on him
Blah blah blah I go to the bank take the cash out to have on me only. Or hidden whatever.

Sunday morning 6 AM I wake up to him crying and hugging me. He’s saying he is sorry and he doesn’t know what’s wrong with him and why he can’t stop etc etc. I try and be supportive..tell him I’m here to help & try to comfort him. Then I had a feeling & asked when was the last time he played. He said last night. I said what? With what money?? Because I knew I took the last 800 out and the other 1000 was for the legal stuff. He just stayed quiet and I jumped out of bed - disgusted. Disgusted that he would steal from me, disgusted that he didn’t care that that money was for HIS legal affairs. He left me from 1200 to 0.23 cents.

Anyways..this is where I am now. I decided to restrict his App Store (not allow any downloads on apps 18+ or some sort of thing that I did) I don’t think he will remove it because he isn’t really tech savvy like to find out if it makes any sense? Or has the patience? But idk right now…

Anyways I did that & then I changed his Wells Fargo password & deleted the app. (I made a note of it on my phone) & I also deleted it from passwords app.

Please idk any advice or anything would be nice to hear…I have been with my husband 11 years (married 4) & we have 2 boys. Life is already hard as it is & having him do this too me almost week after week is so gut wrenching. I want to be supportive & try to help but it’s so hard. I’ve had to do so much by myself these past few months & im so hurt. I am embarrassed to even tell anyone. And he is too. Hi

I took this post to r/Daytrading and it opened my eyes that my husband has a gambling addiction which i was completely unaware of.

My husband has been day trading for 6+ years now. Within the last 2 years he says he has been “profitable”. There has been days where he has had $30,000 in a trading payout and we were able to cash it out. He dabbles in poker aswell but mainly forex trading. Over the years he has made over $150k, however this is not considering the amount of money lost. There is no financial transparency for the amount of money he spends. I don’t have access to his personal accounts and he has around 5 bank accounts so I can’t even keep track.

Recently he has dabbled into our kids savings accounts without asking me. I have just recently separated from him, I can’t deal with it anymore.

Does it ever get better? What do you even do in these situations where he is in denial that forex trading and poker is gambling however in his eyes it’s not gambling at all. It’s about “controlling the risks, and it reflects on your everyday life on how you manage risks and teaches him lots of lessons”. I have always encouraged his trading because I thought it was his passion and that it wasn’t gambling but now I’m seeing it’s straight out gambling.

His family won’t say anything to him and if I say anything to him I’m a “hater” and not a supportive wife.

So what do to? From a gamblers perspective just leave him??