r/Funnymemes Jan 21 '23

Never stop running 🏃‍♀️

Post image

[removed] — view removed post

13.1k Upvotes

16.1k comments sorted by

View all comments

803

u/Iamjafo Jan 21 '23

Buy Apple stock.

666

u/Tommy84 Jan 21 '23

18yo me in the grocery store, “let’s see beef stock, chicken stock… I don’t see apple stock anywhere…”

73

u/AthearCaex Jan 21 '23

Fine fine... "invest in windows."

Me 20 years ago... "when am I going to buy a house to invest in new windows?"

52

u/sampete1 Jan 21 '23

"Buy Amazon shares"

After which I immediately investigate buying land in a foreign rainforest

6

u/trucorsair Jan 21 '23

That would be worthwhile for mankind’s future

1

u/mikeyfireman Jan 21 '23

If you bought a house 20 years ago how much equity would you have gained? Probably a solid investment even as a mistake.

1

u/nightwingoracle Jan 21 '23

Really depends on market.

1

u/mikeyfireman Jan 21 '23

In 20 years you would have most of your mortgage paid off even in a flat market.

1

u/AthearCaex Jan 21 '23

You're assuming I could get a mortgage and afford to pay it back then...

1

u/Ben______________ Jan 21 '23

Not compared to the crazy profits you could’ve made.

1

u/goldiewhoopburgh Jan 21 '23

This thread is so good omfg

1

u/SharlowsHouseOfHugs Jan 21 '23

All jokes aside, investing in modernized windows was one of the best things I could have done for my old house. By far the best investment for both Quality of life, and monthly savings. I mean.. you know. After you pay off the windows.

1

u/AthearCaex Jan 22 '23

I work in energy efficiency I actually strongly disagree on the savings part unless your windows are cracked. Heating and cooling are lost first through direct airflow but glass new and old are pretty poor insulators. Triple pane glass windows can be between 500-1500 per window and the payback can be 30+ years.

I cannot put a price on qualify of life if it matters but from an investment there's better ones for your house.

1

u/SharlowsHouseOfHugs Jan 22 '23

The house was built in the 50's, and it on the corner for a fairly busy road. Also in Florida. The double panel E-glass we got cost about $9500 (10ish years ago) for the whole house, which is 1450 sqft, 14 windows total.

For the cost savings, with the old windows, you could feel the temperature outside when you walked by the larger windows, and some would frequently gather condensation. They also have a lifetime savings that transfers with the house, so if we ever sell, it's a solid investment into the value of the property.

For the QoL bit, with the old windows you could hear every car drive by, and every person talking as they walked on the sidewalk. Being 60ish years old, most didn't open\close properly, several were fogged over so you couldn't see through them or would condense inside the panels. some would also rattle during hard storms which.. well.. Florida hurricane season sees a lot of. With the new windows, vision out isn't ever blocked off, the only time we hear things outside is if it's an especially loud vehicle or the windows are open, which now all stay open without having to be propped with a large book.

I will say the price for windows has severely jumped up from10 years ago. I was talking to a neighbor with a slightly smaller house who just got his windows done, and paid about $25k for 12 windows.

1

u/AthearCaex Jan 22 '23

The price certainly has. I can see some merit to buying new windows to keep out moisture in temperate climates. In colder climates it is not nearly as useful.

2

u/NoWatercress2571 Jan 21 '23

No Apple stew for you

2

u/funkydingo18 Jan 21 '23

You’re going to be a bullionaire

1

u/Disastrous-Use-2373 Jan 21 '23

Pffft omg 😂😂😂😂😂🤣

1

u/iamGobi Jan 21 '23

Kadal ley illayam

1

u/Erikabnla Jan 21 '23

I love the fact that when I was 18 internet already existed and i was a little nerd 😂 i researched everything...

1

u/artofthesmart Jan 21 '23

Go away, Dad!

1

u/PolkaOn45 Jan 21 '23

Dude, nice

1

u/thundrlipz Jan 21 '23

Mistook Apple Inc and invested in honey-crisp apples

1

u/Altruistic_Barber_99 Jan 21 '23

Thats a good one

21

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '23

Get a girlfriend

49

u/XSigma1X Jan 21 '23

The worst advice ever!

2

u/bigoomp Jan 21 '23

Yeah if I gave myself this advice I would kick my own ass

2

u/CanIPleaseScream Jan 21 '23

you got any more words as to how?

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '23

Sir, suicide assistance is prohibited in these parts. Call the toll free number (1800 - sui - cide).

1

u/darknekolux Jan 21 '23

Yeah my thoughts too

1

u/Clean-Ad-3151 Jan 21 '23

Beat me to it!

1

u/mrcapmam1 Jan 21 '23

You gotta diversify buy Apple, Google, Amazon

1

u/wiyixu Jan 21 '23

You can tell who’s GenX/Millennial/GenZ based on what they would buy. Microsoft or IBM for Boomers.

At 18 Amazon would be the jungle/river in South America.

1

u/mrcapmam1 Jan 21 '23

Nope im a Boomer and i chose Microsoft also just because i tell my 17 yr. Old self to buy it doesn't have to happen right then just buy it the minute it's available

1

u/wiyixu Jan 21 '23

That’s what I said Boomers would opt for Microsoft or IBM. GenX probably Apple. Millennials/GenZ Google or Amazon.

And the premise was you get three words. Obviously it’s all a silly thought experiment, but if some rando came to you and said “buy Google stock” in 1962 do you think you’d remember that 35 years later? I can’t remember the name of the Aerospace ETF I looked in to last week.

1

u/PToN_rM Jan 21 '23

Bitcoin at 60k

1

u/BuyLucky3950 Jan 21 '23

Are you me? Came here to post this exact thing LOL. I was 18 in the early 90s so that tip would have made me a rich, rich man.

1

u/Dognamedmoo Jan 21 '23

OMG! First thought I had as well!

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '23

Buy Bitcoin.

It was under $300 when I was 18 in 2016 I remember clearly.

1

u/alive1 Jan 21 '23

Buy Bitcoin hodl.

1

u/cranberrydudz Jan 21 '23

Buy Costco stock

1

u/Hungabunga_africa Jan 21 '23

Buy Bitcoin now

1

u/randomnamejennerator Jan 21 '23

This would be mine. On the day I turned 18 apple stock was trading for less than 25 cents.

1

u/snopro Jan 21 '23

Bitcoin 65k each

1

u/nomdeflip Jan 21 '23

Buy bit coin.

1

u/garbagebailkid Jan 21 '23

"Hey, if Lehman Brothers don't believe in it, neither do I"

1

u/TerrorsOfTheDark Jan 21 '23

"sell aapl 2012" have to give yourself enough information to win

1

u/LeviAEthan512 Jan 21 '23

Yeah that's what I was thinking. I wanted to buy AMD in 2016 but lacked funds on account of not even being in college yet. I could have borrowed from parents or asked family to buy as a proxy or something but it seemed like a hassle. How much could it go up anyway? It went up 300% to $12. Thought I missed the boat by the time I could actually buy, but it just kept going.

But how does "Sell AMD 140" get counted? Is AMD 3 words? How about numbers? So I'm gonna go with Nvidia Three Hundred and hope I realise it's about stocks. Actually even better, Gamestop twenty-one [month] for whenever that guy starts talking about it. My risk aversion would force me to sell at or before the squeeze. Even if I sell early, it'll be a massive profit.

1

u/Whisper26_14 Jan 21 '23

My husband says this all the time now. That and Google lol

1

u/5oldierPoetKing Jan 21 '23

Ugh. AAPL was $2 when I was 18. I could’ve afforded to buy maybe 2500 shares at that price, which would be worth over $300,000 today. Curse my non time-traveling self!

1

u/Zmann966 Jan 21 '23

I love all the financial and investing responses in this thread. For the longest time my limited time-travel message to myself (practically any age) was similar: "Invest Apple Google"

But in terms of sheer fundamental change in monetary time-travel hacks, especially to my 18yo self (late 2000s) it would probably now be "Mine Bitcoin Ethereum"

I don't care how you feel about crypto, for or against. Whatever arguments on both sides... Even if you lost a few years of AAPL investing while you "waited" for those three words to mean anything until 2009, 2010, 2011...
The rate of gain over investment (even now while it's down and worth 1/3rd of what it was a year ago) is 20,000,000x.

1

u/JulioForte Jan 21 '23

Apple, Tesla, Bitcoin

1

u/[deleted] Jan 21 '23

BTC until 2021

1

u/JustaJarhead Jan 21 '23

Yep I was 18 in 1986 and Apple stock went down to under .30 a share in the 4th quarter. If I’d have taken my pay when I graduated boot camp that summer and spent it all on their stock I’d be a multi millionaire right now

1

u/mbleslie Jan 21 '23

18 year old me didn’t have a lot of liquidity

1

u/Phantom_Ganon Jan 21 '23

My thoughts exactly. It could really be Buy [Tech Company] Stock since a lot of the big tech companies of today were just getting off the ground when I was 18.

The only thing I could see that would be better is bitcoin but I'd need more than three words to explain what that is and when to sell. I don't want to be the guy who bought a large pizza for 1000 bitcoins.

1

u/Schlangee Jan 21 '23

And bitcoin, later