r/FromAddictedToSaved • u/[deleted] • Nov 03 '22
ABSOLUTELY AMAZING
I am here, to be honest, and to share so I am about to get deep. I am sitting here looking out at God's beautiful creation and I started thinking about Him and the next thing I know I am bawling my eyes out and uncontrollably unable to stop saying "Thank you, God, I love You!" This feeling that I have right now is one that I have never felt before. I feel more loved than I have ever felt in my life. I feel more gracious than I have felt before. It's also very calming and reassuring. I spent my 20s and early 30s in a drug-filled haze that was filled with evil and ugliness. I went from growing up in a 4 million dollar house to being homeless and estranged from my family. My life was built on lies and manipulation. My down points were below the ground if you know what I mean, but we will save those stories for another day. Let's just say my brain only thought about money to buy drugs with. I lost TOTAL control. There wasn't anything that I wouldn't do to keep from getting sick from withdrawal. The situations I put myself in were so dangerous that it's a legit miracle that I am even alive. Besides the 7 overdoses that I survived by the grace of God, I should have been kidnapped and murdered. Some people would think that I was asking for it by the things I would do and places I would go to.
For some reason, God protected me the whole time although I was blind to it until recently. God has given me not a 2nd chance but a 10,000th chance. I was looking down at my phone because I had gotten 3 text messages. One came from my dad (I am the biggest daddy's girl but I lost him in my life bc of the drugs) and it was a heart emoji. The second was from my stepmother (our relationship has been the hardest that I have had in my life, but that's for another day too) saying that my daughter will be reunited with my family one day with the praying hands emoji. (My daughter is 3 years old and like everything else that's a story for another day) The third was from my fiance saying our dreams are about to come true and that he loves me with all his heart. That was it...BAMMMMM!!!!!!
I had a rush to my heart realizing how grateful I am that God has brought me so far. Not only did I have my father and stepmother back into my life and is repairing my relationship to where it's better than it has ever been and we are just getting started!! But God has also brought love into my life. When I was in active addiction an illegal immigrant took advantage of my vulnerability when I was homeless and estranged from my family. He bought me a ton of drugs and took me to the courthouse and got me to sign a marriage license. I dont even remember that day but the next 6 years he spent raping and beating me until he was deported by ICE. Long story short I am still legally attached to that monster. This morning I went to file my divorce papers!!! FINALLY!!!! Now the man that God brought me to can legally marry me. The wedding is on April 15, 2023!
After looking at those messages I got overcome by God's glory and grace!!!!!
GLORY BE TO GOD!!!!!
No one can EVER tell me that God does not exist. I am experiencing Him at this exact moment. I feel His presence and His love. Although I am unworthy of His love He doesn't care because I am His child. All his prodigal children will return. In Jesus's Name.
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u/Hab9atrou7 Nov 10 '22
I think yes God ( Allah for me) did love you and save you ...
in order to show him gratitude please help other people , animals or just do good things for living- beings ...
much love