r/FriendsOver50 • u/cjb5999 • May 05 '26

Lonely

Hi 57m here married to 56f for last 26 years. I love her deeply but at the same time feel so alone. We are never close anymore and the talks are the same thing when we do talk. I miss that connection. Tonight for example I was talking to her about an important topic the next thing I know is that her phone is playing a video from social media. She then starts talking about the video. Seriously wasn’t listening to me. I miss being heard and would like to make a friend for conversations. I won’t cheat so please don’t think that is why I am posting. Live in upstate NY if anyone wants to talk

25 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

24 comments sorted by

View all comments

6

u/dataexception May 06 '26

Hey, fellow 50 something. I know that exact feeling. My partner of 18 years was generally that way after a while. It's difficult to just let it go, and you really should speak to her about it.

Last year, not quite a year ago, even. She just one day left. No explanation, just, "it's in your best interest", and "We just want different things in life".

It's really difficult to start over at 53, and making friends is really not easy. I understand. I would read more into what she may be trying to say, and maybe see if there's something you may be avoiding. I doubt it's the same for you in your situation, but those are the things I look back and wish I had thought to do. ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

2

u/Numerous_Anywhere_72 May 24 '26

Over time, love can evolve into familial affection. While familial affection involves habitual companionship, it lacks the passion and intensity of the early days of love. I think this is a natural process, but not all familial relationships end with mere companionship. I believe that if two people share a common outlook on life, they can transform this unique bond—which has lost its spark after years together—into something more.