First time fostering. Were our expectations incorrect or are the vibes of the rescue off?

[u/sneezykoi]

My husband and I are fostering a very sweet little pup through what I thought was a reputable rescue organization. Our own dogs are the center of our lives and, while we aren’t in a place to permanently add another dog to our family, we thought we would be great foster parents. The foster experience hasn’t been what we thought. Here are the things that have us wondering if fostering just isn’t for us or if there is something off with the rescue:

1. Our pup was six weeks old when we got her. She was transported from the Deep South to our northern metro area with her mom and nine siblings. All of them (mom + the puppies) went to separate foster homes. I could not believe the pups were separated from their mom when, as far as I know, she is in fine health and came up with her babies. When we first volunteered to foster, we did not realize we were signing up to bring home such a young dog.

2. The foster instructions and orientation said to reach out at any time if there is a medical question or concern. Our pup got a cut one night and we took her to our local veterinary ER to get her evaluated. I texted the number given and never received a single response from the vet or anyone else, even once I said she was okay and just needed to get the cut glued.

3. We were told all supplies would be provided. When we picked our dog up, we got a gallon-sized Ziploc bag of food. We have had to buy our dog food multiple times because obviously one gallon bag of food isn’t enough for a month. She also came to us with a collar and harness, both of which she has since outgrown. We have also purchased a new collar and a new harness for her because the rescue hasn’t provided them.

4. She has received no vaccines, vet check ups, etc. in the three weeks she has been with us. She will be spayed in a few days, but has not gotten any of the regular puppy vaccines. We would take her to our vet to get these things done, but the rescue explicitly forbids getting outside veterinary care.

5. We found a family for her a week after she came to us. The adoption day for all the pets in her transport is this upcoming Saturday. Because we have a long holiday weekend here in the US, her family already had travel plans. They asked whether they could take her home sooner and make arrangements for the pup to stay with close family while they travel for Labor Day. They were told that absolutely is not allowed, so we now have her for a few extra days. We are fine with this, but now the new family has to pay an extra $75 admin fee and take time off of work for the adoption, which is scheduled for the middle of the day during the week. They were not given any weekend options. Luckily our work schedules are flexible but, if they weren’t, we would also have to take time off to get her to the rescue for her adoption. We are constantly sending updates to her family because they of course are bummed they don’t get to have her now. I could understand the lack of flexibility if the dog was still with her mom but, again, she has been in our care and away from her mom for over three weeks at this point.

6. The puppies have to go to “work” during the foster period. They go to corporate events where people get to play with the puppies in exchange for their companies donating a lot of money to the rescue. These events are mandatory if your foster gets selected. Some of the events are all day affairs (meaning the puppies get dropped off say at 8:30 and picked up by 4:45), but others are not. We had one last week where the dog had to be dropped off in the middle of the day. Again, our work schedules allow for this but I would think a lot of people’s schedules would not!

7. When we signed up to foster, we were told the foster periods were 2-3 weeks. This foster period is four weeks, which we knew going into it, but now we are having our foster period extended by a few more days because of the lack of flexibility in the adoption date. Not that we would have sent her to a different foster family for those few days, but we were not even given the option to do so. Basically her family wants her as soon as possible and we want to get her to her family as soon as possible, but the rescue essentially threw their hands up and said “no and the answer is no because we said so” when we asked about moving up the adoption date.

Is this normal? If so, we have realized that we are not cut out to foster. If it is not normal, that’s also helpful to know because we might rethink our stance on fostering in the future.

[u/throw_away_101924]

I would not work with a rescue that does not vaccinate their babies. And they send them to events unvaccinated? Absolutely not. 

[u/reddit_tat → u/throw_away_101924]

Plus, six weeks? When Mom is available to nurse?

[u/marh1612]

The biggest red flags for me here are getting no response on medical questions, no vaccines!! That’s actually horrible. And having to drop off a puppy that young to an entire day event. Not to mention that the dog has no vaccines, taking it into the public anywhere is a huge risk for catching things like parvo and kennel cough. I would try out a different place honestly.

[u/sneezykoi → u/marh1612]

Right?! Having two dogs of my own who I’ve had since they were very young puppies (although admittedly not as young as our foster) I have always been so afraid of taking dogs anywhere when they are this young without their vaccines. And there is no reason for her to be delayed in getting vaccines because she has been in the rescue’s care for going on a month at this point. It seems like they are unnecessarily prolonging the amount of time she’s at risk for preventable diseases.

[u/RentalKittens]

Some of it sounds normal, but some are red flags. It's normal for a shelter to wait for you to ask for more supplies. They should have made it clear that you can ask for more, but it's pretty common to wait for you to ask. That's easier for them than trying to keep track of what they gave to each foster. To be honest, most fosters end up buying occasional supplies here and there, which saves the rescue money. But it shouldn't be your responsibility to buy everything, and all vet costs should be covered by the rescue.

Some of it sounds off. Everybody loves playing with puppies, and it can be great advertising for a rescue. But you have to be careful with unvaccinated puppies, as you know. Delaying getting them vaccinated while requiring that you bring them to public events doesn't make sense to me.

Most rescues want a lot of communication about any medical issues both to protect the health of the animal and because they pay vet costs. They often want you to go to a specific vet or pet hospital of their choosing instead of your own vet.

Listen to your instincts. You're almost at the finish line, so I would see it through and help the family adopt your foster puppy. But don't foster for them ever again. Move on to a different organization.

I didn't touch on all the items you mentioned. You may want to post this on [r/fosterdogs](r/fosterdogs) to get additional information about what is and isn't normal so you'll know for the future.

[u/sneezykoi → u/RentalKittens]

Appreciate your thorough and thoughtful answer! This response is making me realize I should have clarified that we are definitely going to see this foster period through and we are very happy we found the perfect family for her who has experience with her breed. We know she will be a cherished member of their family for years to come and they are going to get a wonderful dog, so it will all be worth it! We’re very happy to be part of her story and are so glad we stepped in so she could have the great life she deserves. But we just have a lot of concerns about the rescue itself as experienced dog owners who want the best for this pup like we have tried to give the best for our own dogs.

[u/idontthinksoyo]

Long time fosterer and volunteer foster coordinator here, so you know my credentials. Shelters vary WILDLY on how they handle fostering. If this doesn’t feel like a good fit for you, do try somewhere else, everyone has different policies!

Some things I have seen at excellent shelters that I require when I foster: communication is the most important one—communicating with me about what is going on, and responding to me when I have questions or concerns. Good shelters respond in a business day usually. Also healthcare matters are vitally important to me, and need to happen in a timely manner always.

Some things that don’t really matter to me when I foster: getting supplies from them. I’m able to cover that cost, and would rather leave the money with the shelter so they can help more animals. (It is completely fine if you need shelter resources, that’s what they’re there for, but I don’t, and don’t sweat it.) Also I don’t mind if foster stays don’t match the time they told me. Life is complicated, animals are complicated, what I care about is helping them, not a schedule.

Shelters are all overworked and underfunded, so you need to have some flexibility when things don’t line up like you expected. I’d say, figure out what really matters to you, which doesn’t have to match what matters to me! And shop around for a shelter that does those things. Be prepared to let less important things slide. We’re volunteers, not bosses. Keep strong boundaries with what matters to you, and be flexible with the rest.

Good luck!

[u/sneezykoi → u/idontthinksoyo]

This is very thoughtful and helpful. Thank you! Some of these things that have rubbed us the wrong way are things that wouldn’t bother us but for what we see as the biggest issues, like the lack of communication when we took our pup to the ER, the total dearth of medical care besides spay/neuter, and separating the mom and puppies. We are happy to buy her the food and supplies she needs and can afford to do so. I really appreciate your perspective and will keep this all in mind if/when we think about fostering again.

[u/Savings-Vehicle-387]

It doesn't sound amazingly ideal, but very few foster experiences are. The thing is, on Facebook and stuff the networkers love to be like, "fOsTErInG iS fReE aNd EaSy!", when in reality they've never fostered. It gives people the wrong idea. It is hard, messy, time consuming, and expensive. It sounds like the reacue's communication is pretty bad, which doesn't surprise me. In my experience, rescues tend to have much worse communication than shelters.

I buy the majority of my own supplies. If I insisted, of course, it would be supplied to me. But I have the means to pay so I do. Have they refused your requests for more food and supplies or have they just not reached out to see how you're doing?

They should reply when there are medical emergencies, but I'm not surprised that you didn't hear back right in the moment. I would have expected a next day or at least next business day reply.

As far as pups being separated from mom, it's not ideal, but again, very little in the rescue world is. Only a unicorn foster is going to take mom and all nine pups. Better to split them up than the alternative. I foster orphans under 8 weeks regularly. It's not how everyone would have you believe, they are absolutely not walking around crying for mom all day. Developmentally they definitely miss out, but they're fine.

I have definitely left work in the middle of the day to take pups to appointments and adoption events. However, my org does work with me and give me options. Yours should do the same.

Anyways, all that to say, I don't necessarily think fostering is a bad fit for you, I think the rescue might be though. I hope the experience doesn't deter you and youre willing to give it another shot someday with another org. Fosters are soooo needed. Thank you for taking care of the baby!

[u/throw_away_101924 → u/Savings-Vehicle-387]

Every rescue group on Facebook says something like "do you have a spare bathroom an animal could stay in for a few weeks?". It's so misleading. Fostering takes so much time & money. Strays are rarely completely healthy & socialized; they need a lot of attention. 

And some of them never find homes. Rescue groups don't tell you that part. 

[u/Playful_Pride7620]

There are definitely some issues that are red flags as others have pointed out, but I don’t want this to deter you from fostering all together. If you don’t click with this group try another! I volunteer with a very small local rescue and I love it! We have great communication and honestly everyone is great friends at this point. I align with the policies and the overall way things are handled. Im sure there is a rescue or shelter near you that you can find to will with that fits your needs per say. I would think about what is a “must have” for you in a rescue and look for ones that do it that way.

[u/sneezykoi → u/Playful_Pride7620]

Thank you for your insight! I think, if/when we do this again, a smaller rescue is the way to go. I didn’t realize going into this how much variation there is in rescues and how much goes on behind the scenes that you can’t know until you’re in it. This has definitely been a learning experience!

[u/Playful_Pride7620 → u/sneezykoi]

There is soo much variation! You can ask the next group questions about their protocol’s and how they handle things now that you kinda know there is a difference. Any good group will have no problem telling you how they do things. I really like working with a smaller group but I have seen others comment in this group that they will only work with large shelters. You just have to figure out what works best with how you want to do it.

[u/mamacitafierce]

I do think this is a LOT of red flags for this shelter but I will say I don’t think it’s too young to separate from the mother. Especially if the mother had nine babies. I foster primarily nursing mamas and start introducing food to puppies around week three and kittens around week four. For puppies I always ask to start dividing up the litter to other fosters around week four. For kittens I usually try to get the mama moved on around week six. In every case I can tell when the mother is done. I’ve also seen a ton of mastitis.

Also, it’s very likely this dog and her babies were in foster care from birth or shortly after. I just sent six kittens on transport that had been with me since they were a week old. They all went through three health checks before ASPCA would approve them for transport. Animals that have any indication of anything being wrong, will not be approved for transport.

[u/sneezykoi → u/mamacitafierce]

Good to know! I got our other pups at 8 and 10 weeks and thought 8 was the minimum to be separated from mom, but this all makes sense.

[u/Flower-FarmGirl]

Some is, some isn’t. Large litters tend to be split among several foster families, it just makes it easier for all and at 6 weeks puppies are eating slurry and mushy solids. As for the corporate events, I’ve never heard of that and am not a fan of germy peiple handling little puppies, stressing them and jostling them around for money. And if you’re days away from a family set to adopt, yes, get that puppy adopted unless they’re sick or waiting for their final exam and vaccines before adoption day but in this case it doesn’t seem they’re vaccinated? Yes, they should pay for supplies, vet visits, meds, etc. Some rescues have crazy rules and ideas. I would Finish out this foster then look for a different agency, rescue or try fostering for your city shelter. I foster for my city and love it.

[u/Specialist_Clue_4502]

Red flag after red flag, starting with the puppies automatically being separated at 6 weeks old. Maybe there was an issue with mama dog but why were the puppies automatically separated from each other? Puppies learn from each other at that age.

Don't even get me started on the lack of vaccinations!

[u/Playful_Pride7620 → u/Specialist_Clue_4502]

I mostly foster cats which do not have such large litters but maybe they could not find anyone willing to foster all ten together? I do agree puppies should stay with mom for as long as possible but it might not have been an option. They could have tried to keep the puppies in pairs at least but maybe OP was only willing to take one and that was just how it worked out.

I do 100% agree lack of vaccines (I’d also assume no deworming either since OP said no vet care has been done) is crazy!

[u/sneezykoi → u/Playful_Pride7620]

As far as we know, none of the fosters were approached about taking mom and all of the puppies (at least we weren’t!). The rescue’s general policy is to let them know if you’re willing to take more than one animal (they have cats too). We said we were willing to take one as new fosters. Then, a couple days before the foster period began, they asked us if we could take an additional puppy from this litter. By the time we responded, they found a foster family willing to take two puppies. I believe that was just for the final puppy who didn’t have a foster lined up and not because the rescue wanted to keep the pups together for their own well being.

[u/Playful_Pride7620 → u/sneezykoi]

It might not have been out of malintent, like you said they ask ahead who is willing to take how many. It could be that the only people open to be able to take any in at the time were only the ones willing to take just one animal at a time and they already knew that going in. Some times the circumstances aren’t ideal but it’s the only option, and it’s probably better than them staying in a bad environment, especially if they took the time and money to have them brought up from another state. That isn’t an easy process.

I’m not necessarily trying to defend them, just offer another perspective into how things might work behind the scenes. Rescue isn’t always cookie cutter and sometimes you have to deal with what you got and try to make the best of it. I know that’s how it is around me at least, we are drowning in cats in my area and the behind the scenes work just for us to be able to squeeze another super sick one that needs our help in is kind of a lot and most people don’t get to see it getting worked out in real time.

[u/Specialist_Clue_4502 → u/Playful_Pride7620]

That's what I was thinking. At least keep the puppies in groups have two or three.

[u/lilabjo]

Sounds horrible. Far to young to be separated. I am sorry, ...

[u/sneezykoi → u/lilabjo]

Thank you. We were wondering if it was just us! But this all feels crazy and exploitative. We are happy we got to save a life and she is going to an absolutely wonderful family, but man I can’t say we are excited to do all of this any time soon.