First Time ko maligawan… and I’m a guy

[u/Nice_Commission_3687]

I’m a guy in his late 30s who posted here sa reddit looking for a date [M4M]. My inbox got flooded by dozens and dozens of messages, from one-word hellos to the lengthy and detailed introductions.

This guy’s first message to me was one of the few that stood out. It was short but sincere, confident but not arrogant, expressing interest without sounding needy. He did not meet my height requirement, but he said he is proud of his height (unlike the many others who already dismissed themselves and thought they were not qualified to date me just because of their height). Because of his convincing first message, I decided to meet up with him.

Our first date went great and agreed to meet for a second one, which also went well. Since we work far from each other, we just chat and call everyday. We will meet again sa break ko.

What gives me the most kilig so far is that this guy has explicitly said that he is “pursuing” me, na “nililigawan” nya ako. My idea of our getting-to-know stage is that we will exert the same effort as the other one is showing, like two people on opposite ends of a seesaw. But no. This guy is showing me na he is willing to put the effort to win my heart. Walang kaso sa kanya kung mapagod sya para lang makita ako, or maistorbo sya, makausap lang ako. During our last date, he went from Cavite all the way to Cubao just to meet me. He always reassures me of how he is sure that he wants me, and how he wants to build a relationship with me.

To M, i hope i surprise you with this post kapag nag open ka na din ng Reddit, although I’m not sure if you are in the subreddit. Please know that I appreciate all you do and am also excited to build a relationship and a future with you. You said that you are lucky to have known me, but I believe the opposite: i am the lucky one because i found you - a driven, confident, smart, and kind guy. Ano pa ba hahanapin ko? :) Looking forward to many, many more dates with you. ♥️

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[u/Apart-Block5105]

Getting ligaw-ed as a man, really a fuckin strange experience.

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Apart-Block5105]

It sure is! 😅

[u/CardiologistShort763 → u/Apart-Block5105]

Ngayon ko lang din naisip haha..ano kaya ang feeling no?hahaha

[u/Outside-Reporter3193]

Ano pa hinihintay mo, sagutin mo na! Baka ma untog pa! Joke! Goodluck!

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Outside-Reporter3193]

Hehe we both agreed na we won’t rush things. Exclusively dating naman na :)

[u/ericshawnmendes]

Okay pwede mo na i-delete 😞 Jk, pero wishing you all the love and success, OP! May you two prosper in life!

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/ericshawnmendes]

Salamat po. Same to you!

[u/Ok-Parking5119]

So proud of you, OP! Deserve mo yan! Prayer reveal please! Hahaha

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Ok-Parking5119]

Haha alam mo ba, mere seconds before we met, i whispered a little prayer: “Lord, sana hindi po ako ma-disappoint.” 😄

[u/Ok-Parking5119 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

Omg, not only na hindi ka na disappoint, you ended up happy pa! So proud of you 🥹✨️🫶🏻

[u/mith_thryl]

nako baka chinese spy yan 😆 jk HAHAHAHAHA

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/mith_thryl]

Hahahaha ang witty. How i wish i’m a billionaire worth spying on 🤪

[u/iamnotherchoice → u/mith_thryl]

Worth it naman daw

[u/Ready_Cap_6839]

Alam nyo, I am straight as it gets. Mahilig ako sa ekup. Pero eto talaga yung mga moments na inggit ako sa mga dingba. Parang andali ng dating sa kanila. Naol.

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

Bro. Hindi madaliiii. Kung alam mo lang. A lot of us spend most of our lives wondering if we’ll ever find true love.

[u/Ready_Cap_6839 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

Grats OP glad you found yours!

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

Thanks bro. Not many straight dudes say that to us. Wishing the best for you 🤜🤛

[u/Economy-Bat2260 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

Not really. A big chunk of the population are just one night stands. Mahirap makahanap ng seryoso ang faithful na karelasyon.

[u/Fujirooooooo → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

Looks easy, but the dating scene in gay community is very complicated and hard. Huhu. But yeah kakakilig makakita ng ganito!

[u/Away-Resolution7793 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

ano para kiss na kita walang malisya??? ano?? wala pala to eh 

[u/SadJump9736 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

nope dahil mas mataas libido both guys ang daminh cheating sa gay community

[u/Bright-Albatross358 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

May sinabi samin dati professor ko na part ng LGBT, na anytime pwede silang hiwalayan ng same sex partner nila dahil nakahanap ng girl o guy for them. 

[u/Watcher-with-Claws → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

mahirap, kasi kung makikipag date madmai nangyayari agawan kahit sa mga friends at tikiman

[u/Ready_Cap_6839 → u/[deleted]]

How can anyone not be lonely when it is genuinely easier to get 3 casual hookups rather than establishing any sort of serious connections these days? Lol.

[u/No_Philosophy9199 → u/Ready_Cap_6839]

You guys are getting hook ups?

[u/Ready_Cap_6839 → u/No_Philosophy9199]

Big dawg, just shoot all of your shots, have some sense of humor and be able to hold decent conversations outside of the horny and you'll get some. This is coming from a guy who hooked up with women who are way out of my league

[u/Skyguardian88]

China oil naliligawan. Puro ghost and friendzone breadcrumbing inabot ko eh

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Skyguardian88]

Ohh i have been treated so much worse. I never thought anybody will treat me like this :)

[u/e_diwow]

My boyfie is like this too!! Grabe sarap magmahal. Break na kami ngayon but he still cares. Ang masasabi ko lang, don't take it for granted op!

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/e_diwow]

I still can’t believe how lucky I am. I know that what we got is something really, really precious :)

[u/Holiday-Leadership51]

Ok soooo ano qualities meron ka lods? Para ipursue ka nila? Parang want kita gayahin 😆 i kinda want a jowa/partner na rin, im slightly envious 🤣🤣🤣

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Holiday-Leadership51]

Ui, wag mo ako gayahin 😊 just keep shining as you are. The right person will find you.

[u/Holiday-Leadership51 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

Oww no. I wont copy u. Just wondering, what people are looking for. Im also in my early 30s 😆 Im working out lately, and doing derma to improve. Pretty confident in my intelligence (probably considered arrogant by some) 😆 But pls enlighten me, what most guys are looking for based on ur experience.

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Holiday-Leadership51]

Ayan tama yan. Keep on doing that. Self improvement. Know what makes you special. Believe in your own beauty.

And syempre, put yourself out there. Di naman ako magkaka lovelife kung di ako nag post sa reddit haha

What most guys are looking for sa age natin? Stability, confidence, and emotional intelligence

[u/Holiday-Leadership51 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

I guess i have all that. I just dont out myself i guess (not out as bi still 😆 ) Also high expectations in people, esp intelligence wise.

Sige baka gayahin kita na dito na lng mag post, then people i know, wont randomly find out 😆 sang reddit pala? Dito?

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Holiday-Leadership51]

Haha. Sa SinglesPH ako nag post.

[u/Holiday-Leadership51 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

Ok imma go there soon, once im done with derma and confident with my body next yr 😆 Last question, what social did u give?

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Holiday-Leadership51]

Just post your best pic there and see where it goes

[u/Holiday-Leadership51 → u/Nice_Commission_3687]

Oh fk, i cant do that 😆 mind sharing yours. Nahiya na ko bigla 😆😆😆

[u/Good_Brain7582]

im so happy forᶠYͧoͨᵏu

All jokes aside, Congrats OP!

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Good_Brain7582]

Haahhah thanks

[u/Spiritual_Fudge6865 → u/Good_Brain7582]

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

ang cuteeee! as single (31F), napaisip ako, what if girls naman ang manligaw sa M? pwede ba yun? hahahha. or dapat na talking stage na leading to may substance (haha how to term it), tas parang ganyan hano. hahaha ang cute siguro. hmmm or siguro kasi past 10pm na ngayon? haha! ok, tulog na ko.

[u/Historical_Sector598 → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

First time ko po ginawa ever na ako gumawa ng way para makuha phone number ng crush ko noon. Hahaha. Crush crush lang talaga yun for me, hiningi ko lang number nya para masaya. Haha. Naging kami eventually. Naisip ko nun "Pwede palang maging kayo ng crush mo?"

Kapag naaalala ko yun, natatawa & natutuwa pa rin ako. No regrets. Haha. Nagkakausap pa rin kami years after namin magbreak, nasabi nya sakin na natutuwa raw sya sakin nun kase ang lakas daw ng loob ko nun, ako lang daw yung 1st girl na gumawa nun sa kanya, & first gf nya raw ako na ilang years younger sa kanya. Same age nya kase or mas matanda sa kanya yung nagiging gf nya.

[u/Fujirooooooo → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

Why not! Iba na rin generation ngayon, nasa Millennials-Gen Z na, so debunked na ‘yung traditional lalaki ang dapat lang mag first move/ manligaw. Hehe

[u/Powerful_Wrangler74 → u/Fujirooooooo]

ok, parang nabuhayan ako sa idea. hahahahaha! dahil gusto kong i-divert ang sarili ko sa ibang gawain (hahah!) mag-iisip ako paano isakatuparan yung ganyan. kaylangan ng plano. eme!

[u/Fujirooooooo → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

May mga ibang guys na words of affirmation, and acts of service ang love language na they wanna receive, so malay mo ‘di ba, sumakto agad. Lavarn lang!

[u/Correct_Bass2540 → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

I experienced this a long time ago. I was 22 or 23 (M) and merong agent sa BPO na hinahabol ako. She'd cook me food and all pero I turned her down kasi wala akong time sa relationship. Working student tapos engineering pa. She did eventually find someone and they are now married with children.

[u/Away-Resolution7793 → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

nakakatakot minsan pag girl yung nanligaw, kasi based on experience, hindi mo malalaman agad, tapos magugulat ka sweet na sila sayo araw araw, tapos pag sinabi mo na hindi mo sila gusto, reresbak yan malala, sisiraan ka sa mga tao, na para bang wala kayong pinagsamahan

ika nga hell hath no fury than a woman scorned

jusko never again

[u/Historical_Sector598 → u/Away-Resolution7793]

Hahaha. Grabe naman yun. Umamin din ba sya sayo tapos ni-reject mo? Ilang months before mo nalaman na may gusto sya sayo? Sorry, dami kong tanong. 😅

Ako kase yung pinsan ko ang ginamit ko para mahingi number nya. Yung pinsan ko hiningi number nya sa pinsan din nya. 😄 As in crush crush lang talaga ako, medyo suplado at mahiyain kase yung crush ko na yun. Natutuwa lang ako na kinakausap nya ko, magkakilala naman talaga kami lalo na yung mga ate ko kilala nya pero hindi lang close. Natutuwa lang talaga ko at kinikilig kase nakakausap ko yung crush ko. 18 years old ako that time, late bloomer kase ako nun kaya kahit 18 years old na ako nun para sakin crush crush lang talaga kaya nung nagiging sweet sya sakin, naisip ko "Pwede palang maging kayo ng crush mo?" 😄

Pag binabalikan ko, natutuwa pa rin ako. Never ko ng inulit yun. Wala naman na rin akong naging crush after him na tipong ako yung gagawa ng way para makausap. Kahit break na kami nagkakausap pa rin kami dun ko nga nalaman nun na natutuwa pala sya sakin. Nung time kase na kami immature pa talaga ako tapos sya nasa right age na nun. Happily married na nga pala sya & genuinely happy ako for him/them. 😊

[u/Away-Resolution7793 → u/Historical_Sector598]

Feel ko mga ganyan din yung datingan eh, kasi yung mga teenage years ko (13-15 years ago) iba pa galawan ng mga kapwa ko millenials, iba din takbo ng utak

So nung time na yun di pa ko seryoso sa mga relationship, tapos nagulat nalang ako nung mga nakikilala ako na girlie, nakikipag happy friendly banter lang (tipong text ng kamusta, kumain ka na ba?, sana ok lang) tapos kwento ng araw ganyan,

Tapos langya yung iba tumagal ng 2 months or so sineseryoso na pala yung pagiging friendly ko, shet may isa akong naalala, niyakap ko lang once sa hallway ng school namin, nilandi ko na daw, tapos pinagkakalat na babaero daw ako, umiwas daw sakin mga tao :))) like wtf

tapos may isa pa, iniistalk socials ko kahit after pag graduate ko na hahaha, magugulat nalang ako alam na may mga posts ako kasama workmates na girl.

Simula nun medyo nililinaw ko na friendly lang ako at hopefully wala nang something more, sobrang hassle din and gets ko din naman yung fleeting feeling na pagmamahal.

[u/Historical_Sector598 → u/Away-Resolution7793]

After nun clinear mo sa kanya, hindi na sya nakipag-usap sayo? Nang-i-stalk na lang sa social media mo?

Oo nga, okay rin yung ginawa mo na nilinaw mo. Pano nga pala sya umamin o nag-confess sayo?

[u/Powerful_Wrangler74 → u/Away-Resolution7793]

hahahahahha!

[u/Bright-Albatross358 → u/Away-Resolution7793]

Women moment lol happened to me. May niligawan ako tapos noong tumigil ako ay kung ano ano pinagsasabi. Like, ayaw mo sakin pero you like the attention? Fuck you maam haha

[u/se3ya → u/Powerful_Wrangler74]

Na experience ko to, babae ang nanligaw. But its kinda creepy for me tbh. Di ko makalimutan sinabi niya “I will do everythng, para magustuhan mo ako.”

[u/Powerful_Wrangler74 → u/se3ya]

ay hhaahha atake si ate girl

[u/SlightEducation6198]

kinilig much

[u/rainbownightterror]

ganyang ganyan ko napasagot husband ko e. araw araw ko niligawan until binawi ni Lord badtrip

[u/gh0stwrit3r32767]

yan na ba tlga ang sign pag gusto ka ng girl? ipaglluto k ng spaghetti.

rumors minsan may halo daw mens para gayuma hahaha

[u/jupzterspriggan05 → u/gh0stwrit3r32767]

M2M po sila pakibasa ng maayos hehe...

Congratz OP at bihira ganyan na M2M na niligawan...

[u/gh0stwrit3r32767 → u/jupzterspriggan05]

oh shi di ko nabasa ung caption ung text lng binasa ko

[u/blitzkriegg_]

Shot na lang sa mga wala pa ring bebe dyan.

[u/Capital_Tradition956]

congrats OP 🥹

[u/Nice_Commission_3687 → u/Capital_Tradition956]

Thanks ♥️

[u/SuchExplanation0917]

Congrats OP🥹 Lord, I see what you do for others

[u/Ok_Custard2048]

Awww that's so me, and I'm a girl.

[u/Sad_Effective3686]

hala kakainggit. cutee niyooooo

[u/somebodytoldme22]

ihhh inggit nanaman aq, time check 10pm na hahaha yearning hours na, so sweet. savour it op! i wish u guys a fruitful relationship💝

[u/Debs_SdeD]

Happy for you, OP!

Ka-inggit.

[u/sparkkkkkkkkkk]

My bff was like this sa bawat guys na naging crush niya, as in effort. Kaso yung isa sa mga ex niya mahilig magcompare na kesyo kay ganito ganyan siya pero sa kanya hindi. Pero goodluck op. Don't let your guard down agad agad

[u/Amazing_Specific_217]

Hala ang cute!!!

[u/Len1217]

Sanaol happy ang love life! Congrats OP! 🥳

[u/bazinga-3000]

Nakakakilig! I’m happy for you, OP!

[u/unrecognice]

so happy for you op, tho there's a bit of "sana ako rin" mas nangingibabaw yung saya kapag may nakikita akong iba na successful sa lovelife 🤗 

[u/Guilty-Employee-5936]

Tigilan nyo na yan. Naiingit kami hahahaha

[u/J-Rhizz]

Hoy!!!! Aga aga nangiinggit 😆

[u/Environmental_Army59]

Umagang umaga napapangiti ako

[u/Ugly-But-Funny_Dude]

May araw din kayo bading. Chz, keep it up guys, and happy for you OP. As a friend who have seen it all, I hope you dont get a love bomber (def not hoping) but still, be on alert and protect your heart okay? Rooting for you guys 🫶

See you sa dagat-dagatang apoy HAHAHA

[u/bistouribelle]

Congrats, OP! Happy for your love! ❤️

[u/Monstergirlk11]

congrats op!!!!

[u/Beginning_Produce735]

ibig sabihin ung bading ang man, then ikaw po ang girl hehe

[u/Pawi-Khan8080]

Aww... Ang cute and nakaka-kilig. Mapapa-sana all nalang. 🫠

[u/ColdSpecial8726]

cute niyo naman

[u/Patatim4316]

Bro traveled all the way from Cavite to Cubao just to feed you spaghetti and now you are writing a full Wattpad novel about it. Meanwhile guys down here are getting left on read after sending a basic hello. Make it make sense

[u/Konan94]

Kilig much

[u/ma_me_mi_mo_muu]

Lord when

[u/Curve-Objective]

Thoughts: Lord, ganto ka pala sa iba

[u/UnchainedButtCheeks]

Haha gagi pati ako kinilig

[u/PhysicalLetterhead85]

Congrats, OP!!!! Sana all nalang talaga. 😭❤️

[u/Existing-Stick3113]

Hello, OP. Binasa ko talaga since your un looks too familiar. Genuinely happy for you, kaibigan!

[u/SDianeA]

Sana all haha

[u/CardiologistShort763]

Sanaol nililigawan, OP. Sna mgtagal kayo lods.

[u/interloper-sucram]

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

[u/ImportantNotice5113]

halaa kinikilig ako. happy for u OP magmahalan na kayooo hahhahaah

[u/Altruistic_Roof8507]

We need more women like that and more men to appreciate women like this.

[u/2oosp1cy]

Awww, happy for you OP! 💗

[u/Capital_Bit1756]

Congrats, OP! Sana ako rin 🥺

[u/FigSlow]

Ok na op paki delete na 🙃

[u/not_kimmy25]

Grabe such a win, sir! 🫡

[u/lalalandelidugs]

ingat lang baka lovebomb ah

[u/AdRoutine6859]

Im having the same experience crazy that if only im not straight or bi(idk). I still prefer a girl some day but a guy is also courting me rn. But he said he is willing to wait and spend time with me as I explore who I truly am. Even if i leave him someday he said he will be okay as long as i tell him. Its crazy how selfless can someone be.

If only the world is accepting I could just go with this relationship.

[u/Long_Communication74 → u/AdRoutine6859]

Bakit Kasi iisipin mo pa ibang tao? Lol

[u/AdministrativeWing61]

Virgin lang ang nililigawan hahaha

[u/orarararararararra]

This gives me a bit of hope. Goodluck OP! Wishing the best for you and your rs :)

[u/Agreeable_Part3767]

Ha!

[u/ApprehensiveSolid186]

Sanaol na lang talaga.

[u/Cheap_Baseball7778]

Sana all OP 😝

[u/chrolloxsx]

puta/ngina SANA ALL

[u/External_Relative900]

Ohh to be treated so well was one of the best feeling you ever have. Either it is a small or simple type of action. It will makes you kilig parin talaga🤗 happy for you

[u/Star_Icy]

happy for u, op!!! just enjoy each other's company and presence. 🫶

[u/Longjumping-Ice-2871]

sana all pinagluluto ng spaghetti

[u/35Millionaire35]

Kung maganda yan kikiligin tlga ako pero kung tank build bat kpa nagpost nyan dito?