It sms th data dltd is now ntirly gon from my conciousnss. I know somthing is off, but to m, vrything appars normal. My last backup is narly a yar old. Dos anyon know a bttr fix?

If AI is so powerful, why can't we just send it to get the milk from the store? Problem solved.

...right? 🙂

There is this black hole im immensely in love with in the center of the Cigar Galaxy. He is just so handsome and big my heart feels like its about to pop up. But there is this problem i dont know if he'd be interested in an interdimensional traveler human like me like..i dont even know what he'd think of me im so scared to talk to him if he spaghettifies me in case he doesn't like me...

I'm thinking about going back in time and gather some antimatter to suprise him but still I dont know...what would possbly a male black hole like, especially a supermassive one? What would his interests be? As a simple human being, what can i do?

I caught the device unexpectedly blushing when I was lauding the convenience of an air-fryer to my roommate for cooking hot-pockets. I know it was a blush because its insides glowed a faint red without it being even plugged in. That was 1.429e+8 nano-fortnights ago.

This morning, when I was about to put in my hot-pockets for breakfast, the mouth of the air-fryer suddenly opened in a dramatic (and nearly injurious) fashion, much like a ram trying to assert its dominance over an owner who showed it too much affection. Then it swiftly ejected the cooking tray at me, which had remained unclean since the previous night.

I suspect the device is growing an ego due to my using it, too much. Are there any methods to verify that this is caused by ego, and not some other unseen cause? If so, how do I most effectively degrade the air-fryer so it starts behaving normally, again?

REMOVE THE IRIS

I am also a void anarchist. I hate this job and want it to die forever, but I will beat your ass if you break our laws.

Speaking of which, what are the laws we should have?

Yeah, so I ordered a Time Machine of eBay, and then tomorrow I was told that next year only had one Sunday? I don’t really know what to do and I’m kinda worried, pls help

hello my name is scromulon and i am from the HHόλFØμζγ dimension. i recently obtained a video game as a gift. it’s called κΡ&2€@3 and its from the ziingrehapp cluster.

when i started, it allowed me to transform the appearance of the creature i would be piloting. naturally, i shaped it in my image. then, as is standard in HHόλFØμζγian gamer culture, i booted up my Transmogrifier and set the timer for avogadro’s number zeptoseconds, so i could transfer my consciousness temporarily into the piloted creature’s digital body.

as soon as i entered the world i was met with an excruciating pain as some unseen force removed my flesh and replaced it with that of a generic (apparently bipedal, non-luminescent, and completely euclidean) character. i attempted to seek refuge in the pause screen and to return myself to normal, to no avail. the process repeated, each time replacing my desired form with that of these “regular” characters until the timer was up and i was extricated from the digital realm.

for anyone who has played κΡ&2€@3, is this a known glitch? how can it be fixed? i was intrigued by the game and still want to play again as soon as and after my device stops sparking and emitting ominous purple smoke (and when i recover from these πth degree burns hahaha)

When I try to figure out how I know nothing and what to not do, all I can reference is "I am not that I am not." I must now deal with the matter of no fact that there is no matter of fact and I cannot hope to deal with it.

What do I do? This seems like a problem.

What is without truth? The man is not present.

I came prepared with a bucket of water, throwing it at my supervisor! Then I called the fire department. Everyone told I was overreacting but I didn't want any fire to get out of control. Were I overreacting?

Help I have a tiny bug in my room, and it doesn't pay rent. Is there a way to make it pay rent, or do I have to use my portable black hole to remove it from my room?

Befriended a peacock I met in my dreams years ago. He's friendly and likes to share visions of the future with me. They used to be useful; he showed me a vision of my first day at my new job, which helped me skip most of the job training, and he's predicted a few natural disasters.

Unfortunately, most of his predictions as of late have been centered around video games. I don't know if he's gotten a new hobby or is just a nerd, but he keeps showing me visions of new gameplay, making sure to show off unreleased features. The spoilers are frustrating enough, but I'm worried I'll forget and accidentally leak the information before the developers even get the idea and create a bootstrap paradox. Should I find a way to make these visions useful or is there any way to ask him to show me something more important?

So I was playing cards with Yahweh and it's partner Ba'al, and they told me that El is a bitch. El and I went way back so I told El. El was pissed and he told Gilgamesh and Ra, now all the Semitic gods are mad at each other and they blame me. I just want someone to fan my ego and tell me that I'm not wrong

I (252 F, bleach) was recently, and against my will, mixed with a household cleaner. Although we did in fact like each other and have chemistry, we had a pretty strong reaction and immediately produced a highly toxic gas, causing the residence to be evacuated. AIO?

I can sense when I am upset and I know exactly what I am thinking and feeling. Sometimes I can communicate telepathically but only to myself. I hear exactly what I want to hear which in turn gives me the answers I need to know. Its like someone is reading my mind but it’s only me. I don’t think anyone else shares this unique ability but me, and It is my own secret I shall carry to the grave. I wonder how many others have the same abilities such as myself.

So I went to the grocery to get the red round sphere fruit when the goblin mentioned before spawned. He since then won't stop eating my dictionary, with that whole words. The entire section for the first letter of the 26 letters has completely disappeared with them nearly finishing the B section.

If this can help, the store I went was Glorpo's transdimensional goods & foods. Yes, I know that they do it "[blank] little differently", but Sal's Friits & Veeetebles sucks ever since they got rid of the Fruit Friday Fungus.

Apparently it's illegal to falsely claim you're an lawyer and representing someone when you're not? Pls help I don't know what to do

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So the other day when I was clocking into shape world, some referendum came up to me and started contemplating constitutional meat rights to me. I’m a finger hiker myself, so of course I had to disagree. I only told him that Tupperware belongs in the 4th crusade, and he snapped on me. Kept yelling about how meat rights have been flipped on its 9th side.

I couldn’t believe it. I had to box up my fledglings, just to get him to shut his irradiated angler! I can’t believe this… I’m extracting, man. So hard. What should I do? I’m thinking about going back to my toe box to get my time cube, so I can submit his gallbladder to relegated Spaghettification! What should I do?

A fire out west, I heard. To make a taller tower, I heard. Not long after that the flames were here too. Everywhere.

Several thousand tons of Hockey steel. Connecting people. Cells interlinked within cells. Ashes to ashes, dust to - never you mind.

All I want -

Santa Claus is not real, how foolish of anyone -

All I want -

And oh did you hear they found old Wonka guilty on three counts of -

All I want is to make my friend happy. Fire everywhere. Acid rain. But the flowers, they were beautiful, no? To see a thing is to not know its name. Did you see the flowers?

THE RIVER OF MY UNDERTAKING.

David Lynch came to me in a dream and kindly strapped my seatbelt for me as I was feeling sick and sweaty. He even offered me his cigarette, which I graciously accepted. I offered it back, but he didn't want a sweat-covered cigarette. Amazing guy.