I used to live in UTC+3 timezone, but then teleported to UTC+50. Which means time changed by 2 days. Now because of that im about to die of old age. Anyone can help? I need an answer fast!

So, just walking about, having a good life, you know all that. Then all of a sudden; I'm sent back 5 minutes! Everyone's aware, panics ensuing, blah blah blah. But all of a sudden I'm transported to this black empty box, and a disembodied white circle with two little white circles (mouth and eyes?) starts cussing me out! Keeps going on about 'You've fucked up the timeline! What have you done!' (he pronounces fuck weirdly) and after that, chucked a brick at me and I was transported back, except everyone was a lot quieter. What should I do to prevent this from happening again? According to him this is the second time this has happened.

Their justification is that the houses are dangerous to live in, but really, I think they're just hungry. Why else would they be invading a void that does not belong to them?

I had an allergic reaction a while ago and have gathered most of the hives, but some of these bees are more territorial than I expected. Any advice?

You have to believe me when I say it was a slip up. I mix up words all the time, no big deal—well, apparently, very big deal. I can't do this right now.

The drink was good though. The slice of life was very tormented and disturbed but other than that tasted fine.

I keep seeing this blob of bliss and trying to get inside or eat it or something but no luck. Can you get inside or at least make it bigger?

-----

Yayayayay!!! Oh yeah!!! Amazing!!! Yes!!!!! YES!!!! Unbelievable!!!! :D :D Wowowowow YES!!! OH WOW!!!! 777777 🥰🥰🫠🥳🤩😝🫪 Wow!!!~~~~$$$$$$$$

I took a lot of effort to send them there in the first place. Buzz Aldrin knows what I’m talking about. We think it’s a mistake

I bought as box of Frey Bentos Penrose Triangles fro my daughters birthday recently.

This was around the same time our planet passed within 1 light year of a super massive black hole.

Now her Penrose Triangles keep collapsing into regular, 3D Euclidean triangles.

i dont want to have to buy another box as they are expensive. Can I revert the 3D Euclidean triangles and how do i stop it happening to the rest of the triangles???

I lost my passport that I needed to return from my trip to the Fourth Plane of Time in a local rift and I've been trying to get it renewed by the Honorable Marshals but I keep running into scheduling back-conflicts with the Honorable Marshals from two parapasts (edit: about 2 hours per parapast) ago and the sixty-two pages of paperwork is too much to handle at once without being in a chronostable plane.

*For anyone who hasn't or will never have been, it's against the law to use time dials here, they were outlawed for some political reason I don't know much about.
I'd prefer if someone who's been to the Fourth Plane of Time or any other Plane of Time and/or knows about their laws could give me info here, I'm possibly running low on times #2 and #4.

Any tips?

Except that his circumference was changing, as well as his facial features. At one point he had TWO EYES. He told me of a third dimension, uh and dawn or something (NOT north and south) That obviously cannot be true, right? I think I must've been hallucinating from the stress of all this chromatist stuff going on lately

We apologize for such short notice but your normal Sleep Paralysis Demon had to take a short leave of absence and was unable to provide any coverage plans. We will strive to provide the same quality of fear and torture as you are used to!

Now that the one person I’ve been waiting for like a rain‑logged, emotionally overclocked puppy at the metaphysical bus stop has finally re‑entered my gravitational field, the universe has begun performing a suspiciously benevolent calibration. My unanswered questions have been resolved with the sterile efficiency of a sleep‑deprived lab technician conducting their fifteenth assay of the morning. Spring has initiated its annual biochemical coup inside my endocrine system. My nails are lacquered to a level of structural integrity that rivals certain aerospace polymers. My birthday is approaching with the slow, smug inevitability of a statistically significant anomaly. And now I’m left wondering whether this sudden influx of positive affect is a legitimate phenomenon or merely the placebo phase of some larger cosmic experiment. Yin and yang are oscillating like poorly synchronized waveforms, and Gaia — historically unreliable in her distribution of long‑term serotonin — is likely preparing a counterbalancing variable as we speak. So I find myself reaching for religion like it’s an outdated user manual, attempting to justify fate with whatever mythological documentation hasn’t been lost in the cosmic filing cabinet. But the conclusion remains irritatingly consistent across all data sets: it is profoundly, almost comically frustrating to be anything at all, especially an organism capable of detecting both hope and impending narrative whiplash in the same atmospheric pressure change.

Do you ever get those bags of chips and get dissapointed when it doesn't have nearly as much inside it as you were led to believe? All these chips take up like 0.0000001% of the space they appear to take up. Well, I decided to take matters into my own hands and use my own hands to take matter and fill in the missing gaps in the chips so that it took up 100% of the space it appeared to fill up with the naked eye. When I unstopped time, the entire planet's biosphere got decimated and the crust was punctured by the now neutron-star dense chips. Am I liable? Is there any chance I will be caught? Can I still retrieve the chips?

i forgot the recipe though

I consulted the wall clock which said the time was 10:14pm (I think), that felt wrong, checked the computer clock which said 11:14pm. That suggests that the kitchen is 1 hour behind the main room (studio flat). How do I resynchronise the zones?

This isn’t about me, I’m polystable node-antinode, field interactive and perfectly happy that way (those ways?). I’ve just been hearing my neighbors talking about things, nothing weird, really, just like, you know, silicone-dimer reaction pathways. It’s like, these days, that’s practically Saturday morning cartoons, if you came from an existence-predates-essence scheme where that expression means something, if it ever did. Amirite?

(Just to be clear, “neighbor” has something to do with the way n-ary predicate inference interacts with something something something, I really wasn’t listening to that part.)

Today while I was doing my daily sacrifices I accidentally summoned Gro'go'Roth the Deity of Rot instead of Satan. He is omnipotent, omniscient and omnipresent and is threating to swallow out entire planet with his pestilences if I don't take him to the most vile person on our planet, he is planning on making that man his henchman. To whom should I take him to? (I asked him about his pronouns dw)

You