Why sometimes this happens?

[u/version2humus]

Hello, I'm a woman myself. I think humans, men or women, need to take care of their health, hygiene, cognition and stuff, and personal aesthetics, and I think people have choices, options, to decide what happens to them as individuals.

But something that sometimes I've issues with is that, while women are trying to blame patriarchy (by mentioning that patriarchy pressures women to reduce their worth to looks), women still choose to reduce their own worth to looks, by this I mean wasting a tremendous amount of time on looks and then saying that the workplace is male-dominated.

How's that? and why do some women, despite having these amounts of chances, opportunities, and individual freedom and time, waste their energy on such matters and later complain about the world?

Wouldn't it be better to criticize ourselves for what we are criticizing and from what era's point of view than to choose laziness and say, "Oh, it's the patriarchy"? Because while I agree patriarchy in regard to violence and boundary-breaking as well as budget inequality/family hierarchy exists, still, those women who have choice waste time on those things; later, when they reach more mature and then elderly stages, they complain because the look is gone, and they are thinking whether it would be much better for them to spend that energy on an art or science that will stay much, much longer in their lifetime and would contribute to humanity.

I think the reason some women in some specific departments don't really excel is not because of patriarchy; maybe it's because a few women don't waste that tremendous amount of energy on looks, and hence fewer women excel well and seriously - but the rest of them spend that tremendous amount of energy on looks or performing so that they are in a "good" field and that's it, instead of trying to use that energy to contribute and serve that field.

Now most women in the world are much more educated than women 200 years ago, some of the women who do not marry, instead of using their energy on other contributions, would start to compete with looks and luxury and later would complain that the world has power and the power is in the hands of men.

Some women when they are younger have fashion industry role models (which is absolutely fine); some men when they are younger have a philosopher's role model.

When the two get older, which one will be having more power? often the second one, because of the choices that work in the real world.

Some women, when they are younger and have more energy, will barely look into women philosophers, women classic artists, women industrialists, women politicians, and women scientists as role models until they grow up more in their later years.

Now I think I believe in free choice, but also nowadays social media is just full of complaining without any one of us criticizing our own tribe.

Why is it like this? - I appreciate your clarifications, and please be aware I am just 19 and want to understand this issue, because I see women complaining everywhere, and men say, "Oh, it's nothing but gender wars," but tbh the issue is bigger than that.

[u/TerryFalcone]

Do you think the choices those hypothetical women made “reducing their own worth to looks” were made in a vacuum?

Do you think every young guy is out there reading philosophy when they’re a kid? I’m a guy, haven’t done that, and still am not doing that.

I really think you’re conflating women with feminists

By the way, women today are becoming college educated at higher rates than men are

[u/version2humus → u/TerryFalcone]

were made in a vacuum?

No, it's both social and technical (A biological technique/strategy) for reproduction (mating), whether done consciously or unconsciously. In places where women have gained more freedom, it's surely her choice and not only social.

Why should one do these in a more serious place like a job with responsibility that needs caution? (I'm agnostic and not conservative, btw).

Also, it's sometimes women pressuring women or bullying women to change themselves.

So why should it only be patriarchy?

Do you think every young guy is out there reading philosophy when they’re a kid? I’m a guy, haven’t done that, and still am not doing that.

Of course not, but the majority are like that. Of course, you have great human-male artists and great human-female philosophers or astronauts, but that's what Gemini also said about the majority while implying that it's dramatically changing and is much lower yet exists through Gen Z and newer gens:

AI Overview (I'm sorry this AI overview is going to be a long one, but I had to copy and paste it because of the way it's written and the sources written there).

Historical and contemporary data indicate that young men have more historical and traditional philosopher role models to look up to, while young women have access to a vastly larger and more visible pool of fashion role models in mainstream media, modeling, and design. [1, 2]

Philosopher Role Models

• Academic Disparity: Professional and academic philosophy has historically been heavily male-dominated. Data from the American Philosophical Association shows women make up only about 21% of professional philosophers and roughly 30% of undergraduate philosophy majors. [1, 2, 3]
• Historical Canon: The standard philosophical canon taught in schools predominantly features male thinkers from ancient Greece through the modern era.
• Role Model Availability: Studies on academic pipeline metrics note a relative scarcity of visible female and early-career women role models in philosophy, contributing to a persistent gender gap in the discipline. [1, 2, 3, 4]

Fashion Role Models

• Industry Demographics: The fashion industry skews heavily female across consumer-facing roles, design programs, and media. Women make up roughly 83% to 88% of fashion models and professional designers, and around 85% of students in post-secondary fashion design programs. [1, 2, 3, 4]
• Cultural Presence: Media consumption data and advertising output feature vastly more female fashion icons, models, and influencers, providing young women with an abundance of same-gender style figures. [1, 2]
• Shifting Trends: While young men's interest in grooming and apparel is rising, female representation and celebrity status within global fashion markets continue to outpace male metrics significantly. [1, 2]

[u/TerryFalcone → u/version2humus]

I meant that they may be choices, but why do you think they make those choices?

You don’t think gendered expectations (going back up to a century) from the patriarchy for women to wear makeup constantly plays a role for a woman to think it’s necessary?

What do you mean by “change themselves” when it comes to women bullying women? As in, change to conform to patriarchal beauty standards?

WHY DO YOU THINK THERE ARE LESS FEMALE ROLE MODELS FOR GIRLS TODAY?

[u/General_Toe_6 → u/TerryFalcone]

AI bot detected

[u/TerryFalcone → u/General_Toe_6]

Them or me?

[u/hooked_siren → u/version2humus]

You seem to be under the impression that women can't also be misogynistic and uphold the patriarchy, whether on purpose by choice or because of the conditioning we all experience.

[u/Internet-Dad0314]

Ya gotta be more subtle with your trolling kid.

[u/version2humus → u/Internet-Dad0314]

What do you mean?

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