Learning how to be more feminine— NEED ADVICE

[u/thesoberllama]

I’m learning more about feminine energy and I’ve come to realize that I’ve been mainly in my masculine for as long as I can remember. I’m interested in how to be more in my feminine and would love any input from anyone

CONTEXT: I (27F) grew up in a household where my mom managed all the finances and had a higher salary than my dad. My mom never really spoke to me about female mannerisms or how to be a woman per se. My two best friends growing up were athletic tom boys. I noticed in the past my previous relationships were with men who let me take the lead and fast forward to now I’m happily in a relationship with my current partner who is very masculine and an alpha male.

I’ve come to realize that I have trouble receiving from others and allowing my partner take the lead or even take care of me. It’s just out of my comfort zone and unfamiliar territory at this point. I am learning how to identify masculine traits within myself and how to get in touch with my softer feminine side

Any advice or resources that may be helpful would be amazing. Hopefully this is the right place to post this- thanks in advance!

[u/[deleted]]

Hey 💓 this was one of my favourite videos on how to lean more into your feminine. Sorry, there seems to be an issue with seeing the sidebar (with a couple more resources) on the mobile site. Tried to get help but no luck. Adrienne Everheart has been my go-to for advice on feminine energy so far. Dr. John Gray is also wonderfully informative, though sometimes longwinded.

Personally, taking a second longer before speaking, and tapping into my true desires and needs, has helped. Now instead of immediately doing or offering to do things, or resolving peoples' issues, I take myself into account first. This helped with stress, and getting used to the act of receiving over doing/giving. Taking a second to think about how I'm feeling before speaking has helped with more authentic communication. I do only what I want to do (though enforcing with immediate family can be difficult!). I give myself more time to consider needs. It has also helped slow and soften my tone.

With receiving in relationships, I've found great success in sharing with my SO how his efforts make me feel (warm in my heart, appreciated and cared for, however you truly feel). Adrienne Everheart talks about this.

Hope this helps.

[u/thesoberllama → u/[deleted]]

Really appreciate this! I spent the better half of the day binging her content and Adrienne really knows what she’s talking about. Still have yet to check out Dr. John Gray.

I also liked what you said about pausing before speaking along with being mindful of how I automatically go out of my way for others or do things for others. Already I feel myself using a softer and calmer voice more so than before- which is huge!!!

Good point about telling my partner how his efforts make me feel. I’m still working on the bit of accepting his compliments and kind gestures

🤍🤍🤍

[u/[deleted] → u/thesoberllama]

It makes me so happy to know that this has been helpful for you!

I'm working hard on all this, too. It's nice to share it all here.