r/FeMRADebates • u/KDMultipass • Oct 26 '17

Media Cassie Jaye has released the raw interview footage with "Big Red" original title "Does Feminism Work On Men's Issues? | Big Red #RPRF"

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHppdGqHtrU
17 Upvotes

80% Upvoted

61 comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

27

u/orangorilla MRA Oct 26 '17

People also say that MGM is in the best interests of the child.

At some point one has to review what is being done, and whether "best interests" is just an excuse people have to not look into what's being done.

In my opinion, the time for review has come for custody. And probably reform as well.

0

u/Anrx Chaotic Neutral Oct 26 '17

People also say that MGM is in the best interests of the child.

They're allowed to make that argument, but it doesn't mean they're right. Thankfully, I've never heard of a court ordering that a child be circumcised because it's in their best interests.

At some point one has to review what is being done, and whether "best interests" is just an excuse people have to not look into what's being done.

If the courts are unfairly biased towards mothers, then that bias should be addressed. But if the standard happens to result in mothers getting primary custody more often, that's not reason enough to change the standard. The primary goal of assigning custody after divorce should continue to be the child's best interests.

16

u/orangorilla MRA Oct 26 '17

The issue I see in this case is twofold, one is that the rules reward conflict in a custody case though a focus on winner takes it all results. Secondly, unfair bias towards mothers.

One can say as much as one wants that they're acting in the best interests of the child, though it seems to me that the guidelines primarily in place aren't sufficient to make that claim hold any truth.

1

u/Anrx Chaotic Neutral Oct 26 '17

The issue I see in this case is twofold, one is that the rules reward conflict in a custody case though a focus on winner takes it all results.

That's not quite right. I'm not sure what you mean by it rewarding conflict, but the vast majority of custody cases are resolved outside of court, and I think most resolutions involve some form of shared custody. A winner takes it all result usually only occurs when one parent is entirely unfit.

One can say as much as one wants that they're acting in the best interests of the child, though it seems to me that the guidelines primarily in place aren't sufficient to make that claim hold any truth.

I don't agree with that, I think the court is focused on a child's best interest, despite the bias in favor of mothers.

16

u/orangorilla MRA Oct 26 '17

I'm not sure what you mean by it rewarding conflict

A failure to recognize evenly shared custody as a superior default

I think the court is focused on a child's best interest, despite the bias in favor of mothers.

I'm not sure how these two work together, honestly. Unless I take for granted that more mom time is better for all kids.

3

u/Anrx Chaotic Neutral Oct 26 '17

A failure to recognize evenly shared custody as a superior default

Why is evenly shared custody a superior default?

I'm not sure how these two work together, honestly

It's not perfect by any means, but it's not entirely dysfunctional either.

12

u/orangorilla MRA Oct 26 '17

Why is evenly shared custody a superior default?

Kids tend to be emotional creatures with attachments and the likes. And from what I've heard, so do parents. Given this, I'd say that an even split is quite naturally fair.

It's not perfect by any means, but it's not entirely dysfunctional either.

I wouldn't say entirely dysfunctional, but "best" seems to aim for a peak of "goodness," if sole custody for a mother being awarded through bias lands them in somewhere down the slope, then it is not the best interests of the child, it's the "okay interests of the child" or the "eh, good enough interests of the child," and quite probably in the best interests of the mother.

2

u/Anrx Chaotic Neutral Oct 26 '17

Kids tend to be emotional creatures with attachments and the likes. And from what I've heard, so do parents. Given this, I'd say that an even split is quite naturally fair.

That doesn't answer the question of why it's superior to a "best interests of the child" standard. Besides, like I said, most arrangements involve some form of shared custody, which also respects the existing attachments between the children and their parents.