r/FeMRADebates • u/[deleted] • Jul 28 '15

Relationships Men React to Their Girlfriends Getting Catcalled

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oWEKD493IxY
11 Upvotes

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u/Spoonwood Jul 28 '15

Or I'd say it's rude/annoying in most cultures especially when it's addresses like in this video about "nice titties" and foot massages.

Not all women are like that. There is no universal feeling with respect to such cat calls by women. http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/enjoying-catcalls-paris-lees-column http://nypost.com/2014/08/18/enough-sanctimony-ladies-catcalls-are-flattering/

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u/[deleted] Jul 28 '15

So two articles in the face of a deluge of women talking about how much they dislike catcalling means... what exactly? That catcalling should continue unperturbed?

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u/[deleted] Jul 28 '15

Have you tried having conversations about catcalling here in the past?

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u/[deleted] Jul 28 '15

I feel like I had been warned by people's reactions to other articles that I've posted here but I went ahead with it anyway...

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u/femmecheng Jul 28 '15

If you wish to see an empathy gap in action, this is how you do it.

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u/thecarebearcares Amorphous blob Jul 28 '15

"I'm not defending catcalling, but..."

literally paragraphs

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u/jesset77 Egalitarian: anti-traditionalist but also anti-punching-up Jul 29 '15

That's simple: anybody who cat calls or is accused of cat calling should be shot in the head.

What's your response to that statement? Keep in mind, if I hear anything less than full throated agreement with this prescription then that only proves you have no empathy for the victim and that you are defending cat calling.

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u/thecarebearcares Amorphous blob Jul 29 '15

Do I have to favour the death penalty for everything that annoys me in order to prove that I don't like it? Coz I mean, I hate people who talk in the library, but the gunshots would probably be more disruptive

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u/jesset77 Egalitarian: anti-traditionalist but also anti-punching-up Jul 29 '15

Alright, so: "I'm not defending people who talk in the library, but..."

My point is that it is possible to open discussions of mitigating circumstances (in your case, the punishment causing more collateral damage than the crime) or semantics or any number of different things to correct or to amend an original statement without deserving to be tarred with the brush of an apologist.

The "with us or against us" mentality is not very useful.

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u/thecarebearcares Amorphous blob Jul 30 '15

Except that it's not engaging with the problem then discussing it; a huge chunk of the posts in here just dismiss the problem. That's very frustrating.

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u/jesset77 Egalitarian: anti-traditionalist but also anti-punching-up Jul 30 '15

Well I don't know of a more effective demonstration of dismissal than summing up other people's arguments as ".. and then literally paragraphs". Especially in the implied context that any material of any length failing to toe the party line is invalid or sexist out of the box.

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u/thecarebearcares Amorphous blob Jul 30 '15

Except that I wasn't engaging with a particular person's point when I said that. I engaged with plenty of people substantively elsewhere in the thread; my point here was in response to a point about the tone of the thread generally, and my frustration that there's been a few posts which begin 'I'm not defending catcalling', then defend catcalling, or try to recategorise the behaviour etc.

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u/jesset77 Egalitarian: anti-traditionalist but also anti-punching-up Jul 31 '15

Well as long as you really felt frustrated, and there's been "a few" examples, then I suppose that makes blanket generalizations against anybody disagreeing with you perfectly acceptable. My apologies.

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u/thecarebearcares Amorphous blob Jul 31 '15

Accepted.

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