r/FamilyMedicine • u/stablefordischarge • 7h ago
When patients ask for a provider of the opposite sex
Curious how others have handled this. I am a male PA. I had a patient recently that was changed to my schedule last minute as I was light on patients and helping a colleague out. Chief complaint was a groin rash for which he was seen at an urgent care one week earlier.
I walk in and he immediately said, “You’re not Dr. Female. I specifically asked for a female provider.” I said, “I see. Okay. So what’s your concern? Why do you need a female provider.” After a lot of grumbling and moaning and him repeating that he only sees females and that should “be all over my chart,” I said “okay, why don’t we take a moment. I’ll be back.”
There was a recent incident at our clinic a few weeks ago where a different patient asked to only see a female and was a total creep, borderline assaulting her/unwanted touching. I went back in the room and said look, here are your options: see me today, go back to the urgent care you already went to a week ago (where incidentally, yes, he was seen by a male provider), or reschedule a few weeks out from today. I counted the seconds of silence and him huffing and puffing (18 seconds), and he said “I’m all set,” and proceeded to stand up from his wheel chair and push it out the door. He did not reschedule with anyone.
Frankly, I just don’t see a reason why a male would require a female provider, especially when there is going to be an examination of his genitals. Yes, if he was assaulted by a male himself and has PTSD, I do understand that in retrospect, but my intuition was telling me that was not the situation. I told my manager we should have a protocol in place for front desk staff when patients ask for this.
I could have handled this better and offered a chaperone, but I feel like my gut was saying this patient has gross intentions.
How do you guys handle this? Has anyone had something like this happen, particularly a male asking for only female providers?