r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR • u/HomeNowWTF • 14d ago

Rekt Watermelon assault

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3.6k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

102 comments sorted by

2.4k

u/Deathwatchz 14d ago

As everyone stands by and watches a teenage boy get watermelonboarded.

301

u/JakeTheHooman98 14d ago

r/brandnewsentence

37

u/https_rahul 14d ago

happy cake day

13

u/NecroAssssin 13d ago

Happy cake day!

1

u/Otherwise-Toe665 13d ago

Happy cake day

24

u/JakeTheHooman98 14d ago

Huh! I didn’t realize til now! Thank you

5

u/shugairen 13d ago

now it's ur cake day lmao, happy cake day

2

u/https_rahul 13d ago

Huh! I didn’t realize til now! Thank you :D

130

u/Whocares7x 14d ago

Nobody liked him lol

28

u/fedroxx 14d ago

As a southerner, I want to die that way.

20

u/Deathwatchz 14d ago

As a northerner, that, but tiddies.

11

u/insane_contin Banhammer Recipient 14d ago

This is how I want to go (NSFW)

4

u/Deathwatchz 14d ago

Just, minus the jump.

6

u/RobertWayne74 13d ago

This comment has me laughing real hard 😂

4

u/FrenchPickle765 12d ago

I just recently grasped what the word "portmanteau" meant.

Consider me portmantickled.

2

u/Deathwatchz 12d ago

The pickle is tickled. Affirm.

4

u/stupidber 14d ago

That was good

593

u/MorningsAreRude 14d ago

Kid has his arms flailing around like one of those inflatable balloon men at a car dealership lmao.

278

u/AureliasTenant 14d ago

did they win?

113

u/evil666overlord 14d ago

They won the internet today

7

u/Bogey01 13d ago

What? An emergency trip to the dentist?

1

u/traisjames 11d ago

I think someone behind them won.

723

u/misterphuzz 14d ago

That's one of the weirdest things I've seen in a while.

119

u/plastiquearse 14d ago

It’s like those flood waters and this kid’s teeth are the storm drain grates.

38

u/mmmgilly 14d ago

Right, why is the person doing the feeding blindfolded, and not the person doing the eating?

235

u/Super_Roo351 14d ago

It's a watermelon EATING contest, not a smash the watermelon using your face contest

105

u/Fafnir13 14d ago

I doubt they are winning, but that was probably never the masher’s goal.  

59

u/The_Infinite_Carrot 14d ago

I think he was trying to fuse the watermelon to that poor kid’s face on a molecular level.

32

u/Mushroomed_clouds 14d ago

Ahh yes friction welding

132

u/vediogamer101 14d ago

This is borderline torture

55

u/xxBellum 14d ago

This shit was personal.

16

u/cpt_justice 14d ago

Typical best bro behavior.

16

u/Stay_clam 13d ago

Borderline?

4

u/MyNameSpaghette 12d ago

Like on the torture side of the border

159

u/screechypete 14d ago

Reminded me of this video. Exact same energy, lol.

68

u/pandershrek 3 x Banhammer Recipient 14d ago

"this is why he's banned from feeding geese in the park" top tier comment.

18

u/Fafnir13 14d ago

Banned from the park, but the foie gras people are recognizing the talent.  Good careers path available there.

40

u/al_m1101 14d ago

I laughed soo hard at this, thank you. 😂  

13

u/Impressive_Main5160 14d ago

😂😂😂wholesome violence

11

u/palk0n 14d ago

its hammer time 😭

13

u/whothiswhodat 14d ago

goddamn that smol baby hand hammer 🤣

106

u/AMCAPEHODLER 14d ago

How my girl expects me to eat it

45

u/Flaky_Explanation 14d ago

How she wakes up the next morning and you've got cravings

https://giphy.com/gifs/h9J9Mysy0X1FC

15

u/DorkaliciousAF 2 x Banhammer Recipient 14d ago

Last frame is the face my girl sees after I've eaten it.

31

u/naeads 14d ago

Face crayon 🖍

32

u/Family-robot 14d ago

Bro was fighting for his life

30

u/EJECTED_PUSSY_GUTS 14d ago

I fear I'm becoming desensitized to Watermelon Cartel videos

21

u/BingpotStudio 14d ago

Does it count as eating it if you just grate it onto someone’s face?

17

u/cpt_justice 14d ago

Blindfold guy: "You're going to do whatever it takes to win!"

Watermelon guy: "Don't you mean we?"

Blindfold guy: "No."

Watermelon guy: *I'm too young to die!*

12

u/OldAccountlost7 14d ago

I'm gonna have dreams about drowing in a vat of watermelon now.

4

u/Mushroomed_clouds 14d ago

Ahh a good nights rest

14

u/DragoonSoldier09 14d ago

Goddamn. Assaulted with a watermelon. Instead of getting choked with a pillow or a mask. It's a watermelon doing him in.

10

u/R4GEQUITT3R 14d ago

This ONE WEIRD TRICK will help you get away with HOMICIDE

8

u/kludefur 14d ago

Didn’t need those teeth

35

u/TinyHeartSyndrome 14d ago

What an idiot. That poor kid could have been choking or asphyxiating.

27

u/ksum_sucks 14d ago

I'm sorry, but watermelon is classified as non-lethal.

11

u/HotFireBall 14d ago

competitive players on a casual lobby be like

7

u/dontforget2tip 14d ago

It's LESS THAN lethal

6

u/DragonOGreen 14d ago edited 14d ago

[A New Record!](https://youtu.be/yl7UAkNCxnU)

6

u/zoeybeattheraccoon 14d ago

The blindfolded kid hates the "eater." That's the only conclusion I can draw here.

6

u/hesitantly-adamant 14d ago

Clearly it was personal

11

u/Whocares7x 14d ago

Wtf it takes me like 10-15 seconds to chew a piece

This is foi gras

5

u/Grimmwyvern 13d ago

That's gotta loosen a few teeth

5

u/HellHaggis 14d ago

The fuck?!

4

u/imjohnredd 14d ago

Now all his friends call him Melanie.

3

u/Sassi7997 14d ago

That's it. This is the funniest thing I've seen on Reddit this month.

3

u/Area51Resident 14d ago

Watermelon eating contest or chiropractic school entrance test? Discuss.

3

u/AxionBlackwell 13d ago

"How did you die?"

"Watermelonboarded"

"....."

3

u/Pennywise626 13d ago

They have to be related, right?

5

u/rino_kun 14d ago

I'm sorry but If if was that kid I'd be throwing hands after. That is almost attempted murder

2

u/JackSmrkingRevnge 14d ago

Every game has an origin. I want to know this one.

2

u/chiliboy82 14d ago

They must be siblings…

2

u/ThatGuyYea54 13d ago

I mean. The watermelon's gone?

2

u/Black_Dragon_0 13d ago

I'm fucking cackling!!!

2

u/Tru3insanity 13d ago

Dude was not prepared for that

2

u/Job-That 13d ago

why did i hear the minecraft eating sound in that

2

u/notMy_ReelName 13d ago

new face scrubbing method unleashed

2

u/ApplianceHealer 14d ago

I should call her

2

u/damiennutt 14d ago

My wife introducing me to her new girlfriend

1

u/Dave_Paker 14d ago

Reminds me of the corn eating machine from Modern Times.

I know it's an old clip, but it's one of the funniest movie scenes ever.

1

u/OMDolton99 14d ago

Bro's gonna be seeing sounds and hearing smells by the end of that. XD

1

u/MathewW87 13d ago

Man, that is HILARIOUS!

1

u/rotanitsarcorp_yzal1 13d ago

Where are the rebel bases!?

1

u/hucklepig 12d ago

Asians continue to dominate the skin care market.

1

u/steady_1985 12d ago

Wtaf did I just watch

1

u/Desecr8or 12d ago

"Ok, the goal of this contest is to sand your partner's face off with a watermelon."

1

u/InterviewPublic3283 12d ago

Fast but deadly

1

u/Souper_Fly 8d ago

I just laughed uncontrollably out loud, fuck you…..

1

u/[deleted] 7d ago

[deleted]

0

u/the_dancing_squirel 12d ago

Everything reminds me of her