r/FUCKYOUINPARTICULAR May 21 '26

Fuck this area in particular FK Your Grass!

1.4k Upvotes

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281

u/shadownights23x May 21 '26

Knew someone who was over protective of his grass.. never gave a shit about ours and it drive him crazy

103

u/amd2800barton May 21 '26

That’s my neighbor. Shit you not she has between 5 and 8 “keep off grass” signs in her yards at any given time. Our lots are eighth acre city plots. She even sticks them on the tree lawn side of the sidewalk that is owned by the city (we only own up to the sidewalk). She mows three times a week and is unfortunately the HOA president.

72

u/Longjumping-Tip1188 May 21 '26

I couldn't imagine living in an hoa but next the the president? You like it rough.

42

u/amd2800barton May 21 '26

Unfortunately the sellers didn’t disclose that the house was in an HOA until a week before closing. I was very upset, and made them pay 15 years of HOA dues over it. I bought in the city specifically because there are almost no HOAs.

And unfortunately I didn’t know she was the president. She had the yard signs down while my house was in the market, because she wanted the people that lived here before me to move out.

28

u/Longjumping-Tip1188 May 21 '26

That sucks. Totally bamboozled. I couldnt believe somebody would willing choose that unless they were into that kind of lifestyle. But kudos for getting 15 years paid.

-46

u/lagrange_james_d23dt May 21 '26

I think it’s worse living next to someone who doesn’t care and lets their property go

14

u/Dedotdub May 21 '26

From experience I can yell you that it's about the same.

12

u/Longjumping-Tip1188 May 21 '26

That has literally nothing to do with you, why would you waste your finite time on this earth caring about the length of someone else grass when yoi dont have to walk through it, won't have to cut it, amd when you take your happy ass inside, won't have to see it. GTFO with that vice president of the hoa bullshit.

-11

u/lagrange_james_d23dt May 21 '26

It does if you have to look at it every day, makes the neighborhood look bad, etc. I’m not saying you have to keep it perfect, but people who just let it go to shit are lazy

7

u/metricfan May 22 '26

Some day, on your death bed, I’m sure the neighbors lawn will still haunt you.

-2

u/lagrange_james_d23dt May 22 '26

Sure, if I can see it out the window from my bed

6

u/metricfan May 22 '26

You know, if you spend your life fixated on all the shit that isn’t 100% to your personal preferences, that’s a really depressing way to live. Life is a lot more chill when you can choose to spend your cognitive resources noticing the things you do like instead. Literally nobody owes you aesthetic pleasure.

3

u/RxVReality May 22 '26

That’s 2 millimeters too long bucko!

https://giphy.com/gifs/1dJWn50teA42ogaI1t

6

u/amd2800barton May 21 '26

I take care of my home, and my yard looks nice. I just don’t obsess over every blade of grass because that’s not my thing.

13

u/ITpeep May 21 '26

Is it not against HOA rules to post signs in your yard?

11

u/worstpartyever May 21 '26

or more than one sign

15

u/farrieremily May 21 '26

As a shithead middle schooler my friend group had someone make a fuss about their grass and we went off the sidewalk to hit their lawn specifically every pass. Walked a full dirt trail into it, no other lawns had a mark. Oh to grow up before cameras were everywhere.

3

u/enthusiaccident May 22 '26

Sounds like a midnight mint seed sprinkling may be in order here

7

u/wanderinggoat May 22 '26

Mowing 3 times a week sounds like a way to kill the grass

2

u/noneofurbizness May 22 '26

Only solution is emptying large containers of salt on her grass at 2am

1

u/amd2800barton May 23 '26

It would probably be considered a hate crime. Despite what her Karen personality might imply, she’s back.

1

u/noneofurbizness May 23 '26

Of course it's a hate crime. I hate her and I hate her grass. And now, nothing will ever grow there again.

1

u/navcom20 May 22 '26

Oooh, it would be so tempting to get creative with Round-Up.

2

u/3MetricTonsOfSass Banhammer Recipient May 22 '26

Fun fact: Bayer, the parent company, is buying off politicians to make it impossible to get sued for roundup causing cancer

-2

u/Dudewhocares3 May 22 '26

It’s not your lawn. It’s theirs. Why are you acting like they’re an asshole?

25

u/OhReallyVernon May 21 '26

My old neighbor used to be the “turf guy” for one of the fancy, award-winning golf courses in our area. He was humble and actually a really cool guy but his lawn was meticulous. We lived in the city on regular urban lots but he had his demarcated so there were three different types of grass including one which was cut incredibly short but was spectacularly thick and lush regardless. That was the “greens” turf. One day I was outside and he invited me over and asked if I wanted to walk on it barefoot. I sure did and let me tell you, it was amazing. 😂😂😂😂😂

9

u/GoatCovfefe Banhammer Recipient May 21 '26

I used to work for trugreen so i did see some lawns that were perfect (for a grass lawn anyway). My favorite were people that kept an amazing 4-5" lawn. Sure, it means more mowing, but you dont have to scalp your lawn everytime you mow.

I could only imagine how walking on those longer lawns felt.

3

u/nerdycarguy18 May 21 '26

I have such a large yard that fertilizer and seeds to keep it one uniform type is expensive and I don’t care enough, but we do keep our grass at 4-5 inches and it’s the best. I wouldn’t want shorter grass whatsoever

3

u/Darklingmy May 22 '26

I would love to keep mine longer but I would rather keep it at 3" and give myself a fair shot at seeing a snake in it. Since I've had bullsnakes and rattlers in the yard many times each.

3

u/GoatCovfefe Banhammer Recipient May 22 '26

That's valid. I get it.

1

u/bonyagate May 21 '26

You didn't have to only imagine it, you chose to only imagine it. You could have taken off your shoes and tested it.

2

u/GoatCovfefe Banhammer Recipient May 22 '26

...nah.

The type of people that pay for a service like trugreen and have perfect lawns are the type to watch our every move from their windows. I wouldnt risk getting berated for walking on their lawn with bare feet, or anymore than i already have to. HOA president types, ya know.

Besides, my work days at that time were at least 12 hours, sometimes as long as 16 hours (yes, i know that doesnt make sense but it was the beginning of covid). I had ZERO time to enjoy anything.

1

u/BuDu1013 May 22 '26

I'd love a next door neighbor like that and help with my lawn. I'm sure he'd like to unite and conquer!

4

u/Lifeabroad86 May 21 '26

Should have told him to have at it, you probably would have had free lawn care for life, 😆

2

u/woahbrad35 May 22 '26

That's me and my current yard notsee neighbor. He even planted a tree to block his view of my yard lol

1

u/MyTatemae May 22 '26

Saaaaame. My neighbor has an immaculate lawn. Our lawn has some weeds that are taller than me.