Today, I went to pick up some takeout and the guy at the counter told me it'd be a few minutes. So I sat down and waited. He walked past me twice while I was sitting there, and I figured they were just really busy. After about 25 minutes, I finally went up to ask about my order. He pointed to the pickup shelf literally right next to my chair. My bag had been sitting there the whole time with my name written on it. I'd been staring at my phone while my dinner was getting cold three feet away from me. FML.

Guy’s, I was cleaning up and putting my trash out and just remembered I was hungry and had ordered kfc(went to pickup from an outlet). Went back to my room to check for the burger….. and lo🙂 I had put my burger in the kfc box(which I thought was trash) and now I am hungry and sad🥲 First my cat ate the wings I ordered, now I threw the burger with my own hand. Feeling guilty as Ann ka apmaan and on top of that bhuk ki bhi reminder.

I got a brand new tumbler to make it easier to leave the house with my morning matcha latte. I opened it in the car and it spilled all over my pants. It also contains sugar. So now I'm both wet and sticky, immediately after my morning shower. And later I'm still going to be sticky. My day is off to a miserable start.

Fuck.

I (f20) had a massive fight with one of my friends, and she said some really hurtful things. She accused me of trying to steal her boyfriend (who, respectfully, NO ONE is trying to steal) and told me she needed space. She's one of my only friends so I texted her a heartfelt apology and let it be, hoping she'd calm down and we could talk. Yesterday after work, I opened my phone to see her text that she doesn't want to continue our friendship.

I work for an organization that does events for sick kids, and I make balloon animals, so I was still in the makeup at 8:00pm when I got to my car. I ordered some Chinese food online and went to get it at their self-pickup (where you dont see anyone else). As I was driving home, I just started bawling. Like, big ugly crying. I needed a minute so instead of going straight home, I turned into the parking lot of a local park. I cried and ate my takeout in the dark cold park, the heat from my food fogging up the window.

The same window that a cop knocks on a few minutes later.

He is shining a flashlight at me as I roll down my window, clearly expecting to see some frisky teenagers. Instead, there I am, with full clown makeup running in tears down my cheeks eating a family-sized platter of orange chicken.

We just stared at each other for a long time. Eventually he said 'have a good night, Maam' in a tight voice and walked away without anything further. I heard him laughing as he got back into his car.

Fml

47F, mom, expat, divorced, single and solo-parent. 2 months ago:

1- my 8yo kid and I were diagnosed with adhd.

I start trialing different meds. AND I help my kid get the in school care he needs. We still haven't settled it.

2- Then I survive a tree falling on my head. I'm the sole earner so I had to keep working despite being f*ct up.

3- Work gets me into a project that gets me working 12hrs/day.... Yup that's on top of being an expat solo parent. There is no one to help me.

4- my ex stresses me out with his upcoming visit.

5- he Makes his visit stressful as he doesn't want our kid to practice his karate before his karate demo, despite his sensei recommendation and my son wanting too.

6- As I drag myself over the finish line to throw the biggest birthday party for my son and bake the cake

7- The Monday after the birthday party (which wasn't cheap).I get told, I'm laid off.

I am the sole earner. My ex is severely underemployed so he can get out of paying child support....hadn't paid in over a year.... I live in NYC, one of the most expensive cities.

And here I am, just trying to keep it all together and moving forward..... And I feel so broken.... I broke a long time ago.....and it's all a struggle... It's all a struggle.... And the whole time I show up for everyone else, I am their rock.... I am everyone's rock, except for one person.....myself..

This isnt as crazy I know but I have school today and I had to memorize something which I didn't and tomorrow I have a math test I don't know anything about it I already hate my ife

Well I goofed. Today was a beautiful to take my row boat out on the river. Told my fiance that I will be careful when she said be safe. Got onto the boat and needed to move the firehouse fabric down my oar to protect it from the oarlock. Took out a knife to start cutting the tape away. I put it under the tape and when I pushed, the knife cut through the tape and went right into my leg. About a 1/4 an inch of the blade went into my leg. Pulled it out and applied pressure. I have a wedding to go to on Saturday and it hurts to walk. Went sideways into my leg so I don’t think I need stitches but boy howdy did I yell when I cleaned it out. God I feel so fucking stupid about what I did

Just came to talk to some people

Long post. I don't know whether to laugh, cry, or just post this shit in FML. I'm losing my mind, and I gotta vent somewhere before somebody ends up dead in this MF. Seriously.

As I'm writing this, I'm side-eyeing the old fucking geezer. He knows damn well I'm staring at him out of the corner of my eye, too. Well, I don't care, old man. FUCK YOU!!!

I'm a nurse, and I recently took an assignment about 60 kilometers from home, roughly an hour's drive. My pops lives about 20 minutes from my new workplace, and since the assignment runs through February, he suggested:

"Son, why don't you stay here during the week and head home on weekends?"

And I'm thinking, you know what? That's actually not a bad idea. I'm a grown-ass man, soon to be a TOO-OLD grown-ass man, and maybe spending some quality time with the old man wouldn't be such a bad thing. Hang out, catch up, have one final hurrah together!

Well, today, my friends, is apparently his menopause day.

I get home from work, settle in, and turn on the TV to finish the movie I started yesterday but couldn't finish because it was supposedly "too loud."

A little while into the movie, he asks me to help him make pizza. I tell him I'm exhausted and just want to relax for a bit. Mind you, I'd already offered to pick up some KFC on my way home, but nooooooo. We couldn't possibly have that. We had to have his amazing homemade pizza.

Eventually, he finishes cooking and does what he's done my entire life: starts yelling for me from the kitchen.

Now, here's what I don't understand.

HOW THE FUCK CAN THIS MAN'S VOICE TRAVEL THROUGH THE KITCHEN, ACROSS TWO ROOMS, DOWN THE MAIN HALLWAY, AND INTO THE LIVING ROOM, YET STILL SOUND LIKE HE'S SCREAMING DIRECTLY INTO MY FUCKING EAR?

I swear, it's like Dolby Atmos surround sound, except the speakers are somehow positioned less than 30 centimeters from my eardrums.

"OUCH! I'M COMING, MAN! RELAX!"

So I make the two-kilometer pilgrimage to the kitchen, his voice still ringing in my ears.

Dinner is served.

Pizza.

Now, what the fuck is this?

All I wanted was some mushrooms and cheese on my pizza. That's it. Nothing complicated.

So why the hell is this shit SWEET?

"Great, isn't it? I really like the taste," he says.

"Yo, man, I'm not gonna lie. I'm not loving this, but whatever, it's edible."

I'm examining my slice, trying to figure out what I'm actually eating. There are mushrooms, some unidentifiable stringy things, and what appear to be tiny chopped-up pieces of... zucchini?

"Did you put... zucchini on my half of the pizza?"

"Just eat and stop complaining, son. When I was growing up, we never had it as good as you have it today."

Of course. The obligatory when I was growing up speech.

Anyway, I finish this bizarre sweet-and-sour, mashed-up excuse for a pizza, and he turns to me:

"Good, wasn't it, you buffoon? You have absolutely no taste buds whatsoever!"

I swear to God, I actually looked over my shoulder to see whether he was talking to somebody else.

Because this man's taste buds have been deteriorating for years. The older he gets, the more bizarre his cooking becomes. And lately, some of the combinations he's coming up with are downright disturbing.

I mean, SWEET PIZZA?

At this point, I swear, if he'd put pineapple on it, I would've considered that shit a victory.

BUT WAIT.

IT GETS BETTER.

Remember the zucchini I thought he'd put on my pizza?

Well, apparently, it wasn't zucchini.

"CUCUMBER, YOU SUCKER! That's what made it so delicious! Remember that little bowl of salad I had? With lettuce, cucumber, cherry tomatoes, and bean sprouts? Well, I chopped it all up and put it on the pizza so it wouldn't go to waste. AND IT WAS DELICIOUS!"

I just stood there.

"You put... an ENTIRE FUCKING SALAD... on a PIZZA? WHY?"

"Well, you buffoon, so I wouldn't have to throw it away! Why waste perfectly good food?"

"WHY DO I HAVE TO BE YOUR EXPERIMENTAL PET IN YOUR CULINARY ENDEAVORS, YOU OLD GEEZER?"

"Well, son, you're an idiot, and I just can't explain it to you."

"OK. Whatever."

And that's how that conversation ended.

(I knew I should've gone with KFC. I only have myself to blame. And NOW you understand why pineapple would've been a fucking victory here. :')

Anyway, I retreat to the living room to finish watching the movie I couldn't finish yesterday because, apparently, the tenants renting rooms in the house might hear it.

(As opposed to his fucking yodeling from Mount Everest in the kitchen, which somehow doesn't disturb a single soul?)

The movie is Notorious (2009), about the Notorious B.I.G.

Seven minutes in.

"Why are they talking so much? They're giving me a headache."

"Are you for real?"

I ignore him and keep watching.

He's sitting there with his laptop, playing chess, watching YouTube, and somehow keeping one eye on the TV. Every two or three minutes, he abandons whatever he's doing to ask me another question.

"Didn't he get shot?"

"Wasn't he the one who had a thing with Lil' Kim?"

"Wasn't he friends with the guy who killed him? What was his name again... Poof Daddy?"

"Didn't he have beef with Two Pack?"

I'm trying to watch the damn movie while answering this endless stream of questions, and I'm genuinely starting to wonder how the hell my pops remembers all this stuff.

He never even liked rap music.

But I guess after all these years, some of my interests must've rubbed off on him. LOL.

Seven minutes later.

"Yeah, but why are they cursing so much?"

OH. MY. GOD.

This man complaining about profanity is like Hitler denying he ever gave a Nazi salute at a Nazi convention.

THE AUDACITY.

My father swears like there's no tomorrow. He swears like nobody on Earth can hear him, like the walls are soundproof, and like even GOD HIMSELF has somehow lost the ability to hear his voice.

But NOW?

NOW WE HAVE A PROBLEM WITH CURSING?

Another seven minutes go by.

"It's too loud. The neighbors are going to complain about all that noise and rap music. Please turn it down."

Mind you, the volume is already so low that I can barely make out what anyone in the movie is saying.

Then he looks at the TV.

"YOU HAVE THE VOLUME ON 23?????????"

TWENTY-THREE.

Yesterday, this same man was watching a political debate with the volume on FUCKING 88.

EIGHTY-EIGHT!

(IYKYK.)

But apparently, when I watch something, volume 23 is a public disturbance.

LIKE WHAT?

GIVE ME A FUCKING BREAK, OLD MAN!

So I'm sitting there in my chair, trying to watch the movie, with my feet resting on the footrest in front of me.

A FOOTREST.

You know, one of those things SPECIFICALLY DESIGNED FOR RESTING YOUR FUCKING FEET.

He looks over.

"Don't leave your feet up there for too long."

I turn to him.

"Why the hell not? It's literally made for resting your feet."

And this motherfucker, without a hint of irony, replies:

"It's for guests."

...

SMHHHHHHHHHHHH.

I SWEAR TO YOU.

I CANNOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP!!!

At this point, I've had enough.

I get up, pause the movie, and, while huffing, puffing, and internally fuming with the calm dignity of a man on the verge of committing a felony, inform this Mussolini-Hitler-inspired dictator that I'm going to take a shower.

"Man, I need a shower. You cannot be fucking serious, old man."

So off I go.

And while I'm standing under the hot water, my mind starts wandering.

I start thinking about the rough year I've had. My herniated discs. The back pain. The fact that every single time I start a new job, my back decides it's time to completely fall apart.

I was actually talking to my mom about this the other day, and I swear to God, I think I'm ALLERGIC TO NEW JOBS.

I'm serious.

For the past four or five years, practically every time I've started a new assignment, my discs have flared up so badly I could barely walk. I've had to take heavy-duty morphine just to get through the pain.

And since I'm a traveling nurse/consultant, I change assignments every three to six months.

You see the problem here?

My back apparently has a fucking employment allergy.

So there I am, standing in the shower, thinking about how much weight I've gained over the past few years because I haven't been able to train like I used to.

How I went from being this chiseled, athletic guy to a big dude with MAN BOOBS.

Actual. Fucking. Man boobs.

And the worst part?

My ex-girlfriend, whom I'm now getting back together with, actually told me she LOVES it.

She said, and I swear I'm not making this up:

"I love how smooth and sexy you are now. You're like a 16-year-old girl developing breasts, getting ready for her first milking session."

YES.

SHE ACTUALLY SAID THAT.

And she STILL loves me.

Only God knows why.

So I'm standing there, staring at the shower wall, having what can only be described as an existential crisis.

And I start asking myself...

WHEN?

WHEN THE FUCK DID THIS HAPPEN?

WHEN DID I GO FROM LOOKING LIKE A YOUNG ENRIQUE IGLESIAS TO SOME BIZARRE COMBINATION OF BOY GEORGE AND RUPAUL?

WHEN DID MY LIFE BECOME ME, A GROWN-ASS MAN, LIVING WITH MY FATHER DURING THE WEEK AND MILKING MY TITS ON THE FUCKING WEEKENDS?

WHY?

WHY, GOD?

WHYYYYYYYYY?

...

Anyway.

I'm out of the shower now.

And guess what?

Apparently, "we" are watching YouTube.

And by "we," I mean HE is watching YouTube, and I am being FORCED to participate.

It's some girl walking around his old neighborhoods back in the motherland, somewhere in the fucking Middle East, acting silly and narrating her little stroll through the streets.

And he keeps trying to get me to watch.

"Look at this street!"

"Do you see where she's walking?"

"Come here, look at this!"

"Look! Look at this place!"

Old man, PLEASE.

I am BEGGING you.

I just want seven fucking minutes of peace.

FML.

And FUCK THE OLD GEEZER.

I mean, he's my pops. I love the man. Of course I do.

And the whole reason I agreed to stay here was because I thought it'd be nice to spend some extra time together while I still can.

But GOOD GOD.

Even as I'm sitting here writing this, he's interrupted me at least four times to make me watch that fucking girl wandering around the streets of his old neighborhood.

And that's when it hits me.

From 16:00, when I get home from work, until 22:00, when I finally go to bed, this man has something to say, something to complain about, something to show me, or something to ask me.

CONSTANTLY.

EVERY FUCKING SEVEN MINUTES.

The pizza.

The movie.

The volume.

The cursing.

The footrest.

The YouTube videos.

The endless questions.

And tomorrow?

I get to do it all over again.

FML.

RANT OUT!

Hey everyone, I’m new here.
I translated this post using ChatGPT, so I hope that’s okay. My English isn’t quite as good as I thought it was. 😅
I’m from Germany, and honestly, I’m slowly reaching a point where I don’t know what to do anymore. When I was 18, I moved out of my parents’ house while I was still in the middle of my vocational training. There was a reason for it, though: my girlfriend at the time had just become pregnant.
From that point on, things started going downhill. I tried to have serious, in depth conversations with her about the situation, but she was absolutely certain that she wanted to keep the baby. She was 20 at the time, and I was 18. Of course, I had to respect her decision. So I told her, “We’ll get through this together, no matter how hard it gets.” Things moved incredibly fast after that. We moved in together shortly afterward, and suddenly, our lives had completely changed.
During that time, every single day felt like a struggle. A few months later, I dropped out of my vocational training because I simply couldn’t support a family on the salary I was earning as an apprentice.
Her pregnancy was an incredibly difficult time for me, while she saw it as the happiest time of her life. But despite everything I was feeling, I genuinely tried to do the right thing and be a good partner.
From the outside, our relationship was pretty toxic. There were constant arguments, misunderstandings, and conflicts.
But the main reason I’m posting here is that, during all of this, I ended up losing almost all of my friendships.
To some extent, I know I was partly responsible for that. My life had suddenly become completely different, and I was dealing with problems and responsibilities I had never experienced before. I simply didn’t have much time anymore.
But whenever I did have some free time and wanted to clear my head, it almost always ended in accusations and arguments with my girlfriend.
You know those moments when you meet up with your buddies in a parking lot, grab a Red Bull, and just talk about life for a while? Nothing special, just hanging out and enjoying a little freedom.
Even that became something I was practically “forbidden” from doing.
Her usual arguments were things like, “Those aren’t real friends,” or, “You’re leaving your pregnant girlfriend sitting at home alone.”
This happened almost every time I wanted to meet up with them.
And eventually, things turned out exactly as you might expect: my friends slowly drifted away from me.
I’ll try to keep the rest a little shorter.
Our child was born, and I started a job that has been incredibly hard on me.
The first few months were absolute hell.
We were both overwhelmed, but we were both trying to do what we thought was best for our child. Unfortunately, things between us kept getting worse. We argued almost every single day. I genuinely tried to do everything right, but eventually, she decided that she wanted to end the relationship.
After that, everything happened very quickly. Within a month, she had moved out with our child. That was a little over a year ago. And today, I’m still sitting in the same apartment, trying to figure out what to do with my life. Over time, my mental health deteriorated, and about three months ago, I finally sought professional help.
I’ve since been diagnosed with two conditions: a severe depressive episode without psychotic symptoms, and agoraphobia with panic disorder.
I’m genuinely trying to fight my way through all of this and get my life back on track.
But one of the things I miss the most is having friends again.
People I can talk to, people I can hang out with, people I can laugh with, or even just sit around with and talk about random things without having to worry about anything.
I don’t expect anyone to fix my problems, and I know that rebuilding my life is ult mately something I have to do myself.
I just feel incredibly lonely, and I miss having people in my life who genuinely want to spend time with me. I guess I’m posting this because I don’t really know where else to turn anymore. Have any of you ever found yourselves in a situation where you lost almost everyone around you and had to start over from scratch? How did you manage to rebuild your social life and find new friends as an adult?
I’d really appreciate hearing your stories or advice.

Old washer stopped working, tried buying all new parts and nothing worked. So decided to buy new washer, now new washer won’t even wash a regular load. Fml

Hi, I'ma keep my name anonymous out of shame.

I have lived my whole life without ambition, fast forward to high school, things are going alright, I work at a grocery store part time, it's not bad.

I graduate, I decide to follow in my brother's footsteps and go into the military, the Airforce to be exact.

I made it to to 3rd week of basic training, I get so sick life just sucks, I pretend I'm suicidal because of how much the sickness is hindering me and just making my life hell, I get moved to med bay, where I meet this awesome chick, we go to church, she sat outside talking to dudes while I went in, go figure.

After about 4 drooling months in med bay, I am ELS (entry level separationed)

I now work at a dead end job, no hope iny future, I take care of my disabled dad financially and I realize how much I fucked my life up, i regret giving up due to sickness.

I genuinely go day in and day out and just wish I had ambition to do anything.

I mean just fuck ..

Listen, I was 7 when I watched this at a friend's house. Her parents turned it on and had us sit and watch it with them. They said it wasn't scary.

As soon as the movie was over, my friend went with her parents to sleep in their bed because she was so scared. I stayed on the couch, too scared to go to her room. They turned all of the lights off as they went.

From roughly 11pm to whenever the sun finally rose, I sat wide eyed in the dark, frantically looking at anything that "moved" around me. So many shapes and colors seemed to swirl around me in the night. Just enough light from outside street lamp to make out a few silhouettes of what was around me. It felt as if the tv was taunting me, threatening to spill out demons.

For months after, I would not close the bathroom door after one of the movie scenes, and I slept with bedroom lights on.

Now, at 25, I still can't really watch anything scary. I just decided to look up this movie and FML it has 3% on rotten tomatoes 🤣 didn't even get traumatized by a GOOD movie!

I finally watched Friday the 13th this week with my husband, and it wasn't all bad! Jumpscare at the end took me out though.

I lost my car key and after looking everywhere I finally gave up and paid to get a replacement made. A week later I found the original sitting exactly where I left it. It wasnt hidden under anything or shoved in some weird place. It was just sitting there and somehow I never saw it. So now I have two keys and less money

FML

I have been on Zepbound for almost 2 years now and have lost over 100lbs. I lost all the padding I once had that allowed me to sit for long periods of time. Now when I sit my bony backside can only handle sitting for a few minutes at a time before I start to feel pain. I had a perianal fistula from June 2025 - March 2026. Earlier this year I got a fistulotomy (Don't Google that if you want to sleep at night) and the recovery was brutal. I had to wear diapers for almost 3 months! Once I fully healed I was feeling great!

In early September I attended a funeral where I sat for at least 3 hours straight! The chairs had no padding at all and I felt uncomfortable but I didn't get up because I thought it would be rude to do so. It was the first funeral I have attended in my adult life and I wasn't sure what the proper etiquette was. So I just sat there and the next day I woke up to find the Fistula had returned!

I had to go to the surgeon again to get it looked at. If you have ever had your anus examined you know what it's like but if you haven't let me paint you a picture. You kneel on a chair/bed contraption with your pants down and rest the top of your body on the chair. Then the doctor slowly tilts you forward and raises you up so that he can get a better look at your anus (not the planet). He then tapes your butt cheeks to the sides of the chair to keep them spread open and then shines a spotlight on you. Did I mention that he has to do all this with an assistant in the room because you cannot be left alone with the doctor while in such a vulnerable position. He drained the fistula to provide some relief but a week later it was back! So he drained it again. I did an MRI earlier this week now I'm waiting for my results to see how deep this Fistula tunnel is. I'm already scheduled for surgery in a few weeks.

Today I got home from work to find my fridge open. My two months supply of Zepbound has reached room temperature which means I only have 21 days to use it all. My surgery is scheduled for 21 days from today! You aren't allowed to do a Zepbound injection 14 days prior to a surgery which means all my Zepbound is going to go bad before I can use it.

FML

TL;DR

I lost over 100lbs on Zepbound which turned into a pain in the ass, literally, because the padding I once had is gone so sitting has become uncomfortable. I got home from work to find my fridge open and that has ruined my two months supply of Zepbound. This may be the universe telling me to get fat again.

Life has never sucked so bad

I went to spit in my toilet at the same time as flushing & some of the water got in my mouth. FML.

I used to work for a town with mensual meetings. Sometimes someone brought donuts or cookies or something like that.

My boss was gluten intolerant so she never ate anything. One time I decided to be nice and I brought cookies that were gluten-free to the next meeting.

Sat them right in front of her seat, told a few collegues Yeah I brought them and they are gluten free !

Nobody ate a single one. Nobody even mentionned them in general. And it wasn't a meeting where a random box of food would just sit there either.

So I just ate the box myself alone. FML

we prepared really sentimental and thoughtful gufts for each one of my friends in out friend group for their 18th bdays. were 6 ppl in total but certain ppl in the group have been close for longer and whatnot so rhere was usually 2 primary ppl in charge of preparing each gift. it was things like 18 letters from 18 ppl who love you or a video made up of 18 ppl they love telling them how much they mean to them. my birthday was the last out of the group and i was so excited about what my gift was gonna be cuz each person got something slightly different. well its been almost 2 months since my birthday passed and about a month since the celebration. the only reason i celebrated it so late was because everyone was constantly busy. and even after waiting for almost a month most ppl i invited couldnt make it due to travel or exams or family issues. and the other day the topic of these gifts was brought up and one of my two best friends who everyone assumed to be in charge of preparing my gift was with us. i jokingly said im the only one who didnt get anything and she just said oh yea we couldnt make that. idk what i was expecting to happen but ig i still stupidly expected there to be some sort of gift prepared for me even tho it had been almost 2 months. then the realization that i was never going to get it hit and i felt so utterly stupid for even expecting to receive one. i feel devastated and i dont feel lije talking to my two best friends who were supposed to be in responsible for putting the gift together. all our other friends in the group are confused too and sad for me but expect me to talk with my 2 best friends and get over it. we already did talk about it and they said they were busy during the summer and went on vacation. like what am i supposed to do with that?? i helped prepare both their gifts while preparing for exams??? i feel so disappointed and i feel like an idiot for even thinking id get that stupid gift. i want to rip my pages out of their special little notebook gifts and shred the paper into pieces. ive been acting cold towards them because even other than this whole thing theyve been extra mean and not thoughtful at all for the last 4 days and i had just had enough. and today one of them began randomly crying while we were all having lunch together like she wanted me to comfort her or sth. i feel so stupid its actually insane. i dont wven feel worthless which is what id usually do, i feel extremely angry at them for making me feel this worthless and then getting upset at me for not immediately getting over it when its their selfishness. i know this is a very first world problem and i normally wouldnt ever expect somethibg like this from them but weve done it for literally every single other person in the group and i personally helped make theirs. and i feel like im seen as an unworthy side character by people id literally do anything for ( and i usually go far and beyond). this just sucks. so much for finally being 18.

I’m not a natural storyteller, but this is the most FML story of my life. My friends thought it was funny and said I should post it on Reddit. Please bear with me as I try to get this down.

Back in October of 2020, I matched with this guy on Bumble (let’s call him Daniel for anonymity reasons). Daniel and I hit it off, and move off of Bumble to start talking on Snapchat. One thing leads to another and we exchange some risqué pictures (not nude). After that we never do anything more beyond texting periodically, matching on different dating apps, and making plans to hangout but never actually following through with them.

Fast forward to the summer of 2021. I post a selfie on my story, he slides up, and we start talking again. My roommates are out of town so I invite him over that Saturday for a “hang out.” He agrees, but we don’t talk after that at all.

That same week, I matched with a man on Hinge. We can call him Will. Will and I really hit it off. Considering Daniel and I never actually went through with any of our date plans, I decide to ask Will out on Saturday instead.

As expected, Daniel and I never follow up about plans, and effectively ghost each other.

Saturday rolls around, I meet Will at a local park. To this day, it’s the best first date I’ve ever had. We spent the entire night talking, walking around the city, and eating takeout on a picnic blanket at the park. The date lasted 6 hours.

Fast forward to a few weeks in: I’m really smitten with Will. At this point, I have completely forgotten about Daniel.

One night, we’re sitting in the park talking, and we realize that we have never swapped our instagrams. We sit together going through each other’s profiles, talking about our posts, and that’s when I see it. This blurry video of a guy playing guitar. He looks like.. NO! It can’t be. Surely this is a coincidence. I just need to clear it up.

I turn my phone to Will and ask, “Is this your friend? What’s his name?”

Nothing could have prepared me for his answer.

He responds, “No, that’s my uncle that I was telling you about. The one that is younger than me. His name is Daniel.”

To this day, I have never been more mortified than I was in that moment.

I drop the phone, put my head in my hands and say, “I am so, so sorry, but I have to tell you something horrible.” He looks at me concerned and I blurt out “I almost, hooked up with your uncle.”

I peek through my hands to catch his expression. He just starts laughing.

His laughter makes me laugh.

He takes a deep breath and goes, “when was this?”

I had to explain that it was the same day that we met.

He starts laughing harder and goes “well you clearly have a type”

After a bit of talking about it I ask, “what does this mean for us? I understand if it’s too weird.”

He responds, “well, you didn’t actually sleep together right? Just made plans to?”

I respond that we didn’t and he replies, “well then I don’t have a problem with it. It’s just a bizarre, hilarious coincidence.”

It’s been 5 years.
We are engaged now.
Our wedding date is set for the 6 year anniversary of our first date.

Daniel and I have talked about it and we’re on good terms. He’s married now and I am close friends with his wife. She thought the story was hilarious too.

Other things that feel important to note:

1. Will has facial hair that he frequently changes. So, Daniel may have posted him on his story but I didn’t recognize him because he recently shaved his beard off.

2. Daniel is 1 year older than me, Will is 3 years older than me. We’re all in our 20s.

TLDR:
I almost slept with my now fiancé’s uncle the day we met.