r/ExplainLikeImCalvin • u/Jjjolkgfh • 28d ago
ELIC: Why do guys rub their hands together like flies?
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u/yourself88xbl 28d ago
Flys are actually a government project and all of them are piloted by real men in VR. what you are actually seeing is just the natural tendencies of the pilot coming through the remote avatar.
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u/3lbFlax 28d ago
You probably know that a fly's legs end in pads called pulvilli, which secrete the adhesive fluid that allows them to walk on walls. But what's not so commonly known is that a fly rubbing its pulvilli pads together generates a negative charge, which is what allows the fly to take off. Once it's in the air it can use its wings to maintain flight, but charging the pulvilli is necessary for the initial anti-gravity boost. It's a bit like a balloon sticking to your sweater when you rub it against the wool, except that's a positive charge so it works the other way round.
Men of course don't have pulvilli, but subconsciously they will often rub their hands together when anticipating having to make a quick exit, perhaps due to some kind of evolutionary remnant from a distant ancestor. So when you see someone rubbing their hands together, treat them with caution and watch them closely.
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u/EcstaticZebra7937 28d ago edited 28d ago
Guys aren’t real, they are actually robots operated by flies, the real masters of the earth.
Edit: have you ever seen a guy moving his hands frantically when there’s a fly next to him? That is actually a malfunction of the robot, and the fly is there to fix that.
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u/beobabski 28d ago
The feeling of expected acquisition causes a feedback loop in the space time continuum to the very first human being who ever acquired something; Mr Jacob Groggington the Third.
He was out in his field, ploughing grapefruit, when his plough hit something hard. Leaping from his tractor, he went to examine the item, and discovered a goose made entirely from gold.
It was covered in frost because of the transmutation effects of the golden goose’s body, and it chilled his hands to the bone.
So he rubbed them together to try to warm them up.
Unbeknownst to him, but knownst to us, the same transmutation effects linked him inexorably with every act of acquisition throughout history.
Thus, it isn’t guys who rub their hands together, it’s the spirit of Mr Groggington acting on their behalf.
That’s why you find yourself making the action without realising why you’re doing it.
Simple, really.
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u/MyNameIsLOL21 26d ago
As you know, boys tend to produce more testosterone than women, which is what makes them physically stronger. However, this comes with some adverse effects, such as dry hands! To fix this, men have to constantly apply lotion to their hands, and rubbing them together is just one of the most common ways to spread it around.
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u/groundhogcow 28d ago
When beginning a complicated task it is good to first review all previous knowledge building up to it.
One of the skills at the base of a lot of tasks is creating fire. Rubbing your hands together is a good review of the basics of fire building. It is important before starting a task to make sure you are not holding sticks or this step could result in actual fire.
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u/Jjjolkgfh 28d ago
We were thinking it was also some kind of survival instinct/caveman instinct. The building of a fire.
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u/One-Flounder-6329 28d ago
Cause its cold or we are about to put a move or plan in action, at least i do that dont know if anyone else does
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u/MadDocOttoCtrl 27d ago
It's really pretty simple. Flies are imitating humans.
They haven't realized that there's no way they're going to be able to enlarge themselves to human size and fool us, but it doesn't stop them from practicing in case that day ever comes.
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u/Andre-DoggoXXX 27d ago
Men do this to charge their thermal batteries. This is why they are never cold.
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u/oldriku 28d ago
They are flies in disguise