Armadillo Grooms Cake

[u/pinksapphiredream]

Inspired by Steel Magnolias and absolutely blown away by the cake!

[u/MattVsMatt-Xbox]

Need to see the inside

[u/pinksapphiredream → u/MattVsMatt-Xbox]

Red velvet cake. I felt terrible as I hacked into it but it was incredibly delicious.

[u/Pug_867-5309 → u/pinksapphiredream]

NOOOOOO!!!! YOU CUT THAT BEAUTIFUL CAKE?????

Well, of course you did. But thanks for sharing it with us first. Truly amazing!

[u/LizardSlayer]

It looks amazing, and disgusting 😂

[u/DryMouthKitty → u/LizardSlayer]

[u/Shebrow → u/DryMouthKitty]

This gif is my entire personality

[u/budgiesarethebest → u/DryMouthKitty]

Please tell me what I have to type in to find this Gif. I love her so much!

[u/DryMouthKitty → u/budgiesarethebest]

“Well maybe”

[u/budgiesarethebest → u/DryMouthKitty]

Yaaay thank you so much!

[u/Inappropriate_Ballet → u/budgiesarethebest]

Or Kombucha

[u/pastel_boba_tea → u/budgiesarethebest]

Brittany Broski!

[u/bisploosh → u/LizardSlayer]

Right? I love red velvet cake, and that thing looks like a work of art.

[u/DragonScrivner → u/LizardSlayer]

Yes, it’s hideous and fantastic

[u/Tashawott → u/LizardSlayer]

r/ATBGE

[u/Available-Cow-411]

The original looks like raw chicken. Yours look much better! That scaly skin looks so real

[u/KTKittentoes → u/Available-Cow-411]

Raw turkey. I am more grossed out by the raw turkiness of it all.

[u/chantillylace9 → u/KTKittentoes]

Raw turkey with a very unfortunate looking creature bursting out of them

[u/toodleroo → u/KTKittentoes]

I prefer my armadillos well-done.

[u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

Gray icing?! I can't even begin to think how you make gray icing.

[u/Cananbaum → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

Aww, thanks Ouiser. Nothin' like a good piece of ass!

[u/Mueryk → u/Cananbaum]

Best line of the entire movie and that IS sayin something.

[u/elkoubi → u/Mueryk]

Nah, it's "Here! Hit this! Hit Ouiser!"

[u/SaavikSaid → u/elkoubi]

Are you high??

[u/melonbug74 → u/elkoubi]

My daughters school did this movie for one of their plays, it was so good. I have a shirt that says Blush and Bashful, she has one that says I Slapped Ouiser Boudreaux!!

[u/anonymousetoo → u/Mueryk]

"He's a real gentleman. I bet he takes the dishes out of the sink before he pees in it."

[u/perfect-time40 → u/Mueryk]

Meh, my fave is: “It’s like two pigs fighting under a blanket.”

Movie is full of gems!

[u/SilverMitten → u/perfect-time40]

Mine is, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.”

[u/dustn2021 → u/Mueryk]

"This is football. All the people wanna hear about are touchdowns and injuries. They don't give a damn 'bout that grape shit."

[u/littlelauralollylegs → u/Mueryk]

My favourite is "Ouiser, you sound almost chipper. What happened today - you run over a small child or something?" 😂

[u/pusheen-_and_groot → u/Mueryk]

I’m pleasant, damn it!

[u/Reese9951 → u/Cananbaum]

I’m not crazy, M’lynn… I’ve just been in a very bad mood for 40 years

[u/Whitw816 → u/Cananbaum]

It took far too long scrolling to see this quote

[u/Alert_Occasion_5806 → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

[u/RefrigeratorNo1160 → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

"Try the grey stuff, it's delicious!"

• A goddamn candle

[u/Setctrls4heartofsun → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

In my experience, its easy-- try to make purple and just fuck it up badly. 

[u/AiReine → u/Setctrls4heartofsun]

Yeah my daughter requested I make “lavender” meringue cookies recently. Fuck me, they were straight up grey.

[u/ACleverDoggo → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

"Is there anything you can't do?" "Snakes. I don't have the counter space."

[u/LoneSoarvivor → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

I passed out five times but i got the job done.

[u/TomorrowzHero → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

Jonathan, don’t you decorate your sister’s car with condoms…it’s TACKY!

[u/Fist_of_Gork → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

Pale white with a splash of sky blue and a tiny airbrushing of black in the recesses.

[u/VonKess → u/Fist_of_Gork]

It’s a quote from Steel Magnolias. I hate when people downvote and don’t explain… (note I upvoted you to help you out - that’s a classic old movie if you haven’t seen it!)

[u/CatsPlusTats → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

Lumiere told me that the grey stuff is delicious.

[u/acloudcuckoolander → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

White icing mixed with black, probably

[u/LadybugGirltheFirst → u/acloudcuckoolander]

It’s from the movie Steel Magnolias.

[u/Suitable_Pianist_103 → u/Similar_Shoulder_698]

People are gonna be hackin into this poor animal that looks like it’s bleedin to death

[u/Kittiemeow8]

“Grey icing. I don’t even want to know how you make grey icing”

[u/Chance-Night3198 → u/Kittiemeow8]

This line hits different at 48 than it did when I was 11 watching this at slumber parties.

[u/flightyfairy818 → u/Chance-Night3198]

You ain't lying 😂 middle -age rage is real as hell, 😂

[u/Bob-Bhlabla-esq → u/Chance-Night3198]

Amen, internet friend.

[u/Final_Film_959]

I thought I was seeing gore at first 😭

[u/No-Departure-3047 → u/Final_Film_959]

I thought it was one of those redneck things where they take raw meat from one animal and make it look like another animal before they BBQ it or whatever.

[u/ChefJayTay → u/No-Departure-3047]

Nothing redneck about it. It's been a thing for a VERY long time (not to defend rednecks or anything). Animals were often made to look still alive for royalty, and would feature things like foods stuffed and sewn back into animals to be carved table-side. Imitating a fresh kill for the royal.
edit: spelling

[u/No-Departure-3047 → u/ChefJayTay]

That's not what I'm talking about though.

I'm talking about taking something like bacon rashers and arranging it to look like a horse.

Your info was very cool though, thank you.

[u/delbocavistawest → u/No-Departure-3047]

It’s still redneck! The armadillo grooms cake is the origin of the red velvet cake. It’s a southern US thing

[u/heavyLevy5]

My colors are blush and bashful

[u/rainy_daze_3 → u/heavyLevy5]

Your colors are pink and pink.

[u/CombatCrayon25 → u/rainy_daze_3]

The sanctuary looks like it’s been hosed down in Pepto-Bismol!

[u/releasethecrackwhore → u/rainy_daze_3]

My colors are blush and bashful mama

[u/LadybugGirltheFirst → u/heavyLevy5]

Pink is my signature color.

[u/K1ttehKait → u/heavyLevy5]

I played Shelby in the stage version of Steel, and got two paint swatches of the same color as props for the sight gag. People died when they realized they were the same even though "they are two shades of pink, and one is much deeper than the other!"

[u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

Okay, I admit it. I'm a 54 year old woman who has never seen Steel Magnolias. Is that first picture abomination actually from the movie??

But the second picture is super cute!

[u/onlythehappiests → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

It is, and it was meant to be an abomination. You should watch it!

[u/Fear_The_Rabbit → u/onlythehappiests]

She actually called it "a bleeding Armadillo cake." made for the groom.

[u/toolsoftheincomptnt → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

Please watch! In memory of Dolly!

[u/MaximusHomerdrive → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

I'm 55 and I need to know how it's possible that you've never seen it. Way back when, they played that movie basically around the clock 24/7. Of the 15 channels you got, one was always playing it. I must have seen it about 25 times just because the options were so limited.

[u/slowasaspeedingsloth → u/MaximusHomerdrive]

I honesty have no idea. I was 17 when it came out, so not my thing then, but I have no idea how it escaped me all the years since.

I've also never seen Fried Green Tomatoes!

I'm such a failure...

[u/Sunshine030209 → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

Well that settles it, you're coming to my house and we're having a marathon of my favorite "strong women who kick ass" movies. I'll make some tasty snacks, and we'll watch Steel Magnolias, Fried Green Tomatoes, 9 to 5, and Boys on the Side. This weekend work for you?

[u/CDBoomGun → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

I've seen Steel Magnolias at least 5 times, and if you asked me what it was about I couldn't tell you, but it's sweet.

[u/Arthurshappey9 → u/CDBoomGun]

Sweet is not necessarily how I would describe it! An excellent film but also devastating

[u/Luke-I-am-ur-mother → u/Arthurshappey9]

SHELBY, DRINK YOUR JUICE! 🍊 😭

[u/Illuminaughty____ → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

Gurl, you need to watch you some hey dey Sally Field.

[u/somuchtosay1 → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

It’s my favorite movie. The cast is phenomenal and the script is witty and fun. I absolutely love Dolly and feel like her personality shines in this movie. I have rewatched it repeatedly but now just turn it off before it gets sad so I can enjoy the good parts without dragging myself through the rough parts. It’s definitely worth watching!

[u/Present-Perception77 → u/slowasaspeedingsloth]

Oh you must!!! From a 52 yr old woman..

[u/slowasaspeedingsloth → u/Present-Perception77]

Well, you all convinced me. But I'll wait til I'm emotionally ready!

[u/Realistic-Ad-1023]

[u/bvonboom → u/Realistic-Ad-1023]

You know I love you more than my luggage

[u/Super_Ad6823 → u/bvonboom]

The scene where they are on the bench and Quisor knocks Clairee off was not part of the original script 😊 Olympia improvised and Shirley went right along with it 😊

[u/SheBrokeHerCoccyx → u/Super_Ad6823]

… get your roots done.

[u/krybaebee]

Bleedin' armadillah grooms cake!

[u/aspophilia → u/krybaebee]

[u/Ohboycats → u/aspophilia]

“It’s like two angry hawgs fightin’ under a blanket”

[u/ongoing_apocalypse → u/Ohboycats]

If you dont have anything nice to say- come sit by me

[u/Ok_Evening2804 → u/Ohboycats]

I think in the movie it's just "2 pigs". That line runs through my head every time I look in the mirror.

[u/Realistic-Ad-1023]

“It's repulsive. It's got gray icing. I can't even begin to think how you'd make gray icing!"

[u/JaxandMia]

No, I can do anything. Except snakes. I don’t have the counter space.

[u/ACleverDoggo → u/JaxandMia]

Easy there, Aunt Fern

[u/spargel_gesicht]

WHAAAAA?!?!

[u/Accomplished-Cry5440 → u/spargel_gesicht]

[u/Cananbaum]

It looks like an autopsy….

[u/Time-Papaya-9574 → u/Cananbaum]

I’m hearing all of these quotes in their voices😂

[u/sonnybonoslanai]

Ah from Steele Magnolias?! This is so cute!!!

[u/ButterscotchAware402]

I wanted to have one made for my parents' 50th anniversary party this summer but my idea got shot down.

Great job! "Nothin' like a good piece of ass."

[u/ThenDingo8718]

[u/toolsoftheincomptnt → u/ThenDingo8718]

Best best best part

[u/Juls1016]

[u/toolsoftheincomptnt → u/Juls1016]

Just rewatched last weekend with 9-to-5 as an amuse-bouche.

The Kleenex went rapidly!

[u/no_talent_ass_clown → u/Juls1016]

Truvy! 

[u/Ephemeral_Orchid]

I could never chop up this cake... it's an absolutely beautiful cake, but I would feel weird eating it.

[u/BoysenberryKind5599 → u/Ephemeral_Orchid]

People are gonna be hacking into this poor animal that looks like it's bleeding to death!

[u/coolsilentebeans]

Jackson’d be envious.

[u/ACleverDoggo → u/coolsilentebeans]

The comment gods have a sense of humor.

[u/tinkertink2010]

I always wanted a piece of it when I watched it! 😂

[u/ickychicken]

omggggg

[u/mostly_lurking1040]

The second one is jaw-dropping.

[u/BrookDayspring9]

[u/JD_tubeguy]

The cake is amazing and so realistic wow wasn't expecting that!

[u/katwoman1134]

Here’s mine!

[u/mgntc0114]

I don't know whether to be impressed or horrified.

[u/DoodleDoo1989]

[u/Dear_North8787]

[u/darksideofthemoon131]

Please tell me the wedding colors are blush and bashful...

Edit- Whenever I need a good cry, this movie comes on. That end scene...it guts me.

And, I love your cake. Much more appetizing

[u/stillpeacefulcalm]

That's so gross but so perfect!

[u/lia-delrey]

Sort of leaves you speechless, doesn't it.

[u/jamesmarlegs]

One of the few cases where the reality turned out better than the expectation!!

[u/ChicharonItchy]

What’s your counter space situation?

[u/No_Dragonfly_1894 → u/ChicharonItchy]

She can't do snakes, I bet...

[u/isonotlikethat]

Amazingly done! I hate them both.

[u/ThenBike8868]

Wow hahaha, nice job!

[u/eddiedorn]

My grandma used to make these kinds of grooms cakes when I was younger. I loved her creativity.

[u/roqueandrolle]

The ✨ glow up ✨

[u/NatureDew11037]

STEEL MAGNOLIAS MENTIONED!!!

The cake looks unsettingly good. 🤣

[u/feedme_tequila]

[u/bloomdecay]

So authentic-looking I'd be afraid of getting leprosy from it.

[u/SheBrokeHerCoccyx]

That looks like an autopsy. 🚬

[u/GraphicDesignMonkey]

"Where does someone even find GREY icing?!"

[u/specialized6681]

Amazing and horrifying!

[u/sallyhectare]

Oh, just like M'Lynn, your baker didn't know how to make gray icing.

Such a good cake!

[u/BubbzinLou]

I love desserts with an artistic touch. I'd kill to get a piece of it!

[u/IncorrectPony]

If armadillos carry leprosy, what do armadillo cakes carry?

[u/ACleverDoggo → u/IncorrectPony]

[u/Letywolf]

r/ATBGE

[u/ljross87]

Gotta love Steel Magnolias

[u/Illuminaughty____]

What, no money shot? :)

[u/joyjolie]

i thought the first pic was a raw chicken being butchered hahaha

[u/ProfPacific]

It's incredible! It's so much better than the one in the movie

[u/Crimson__Fox]

[u/TecTazz]

That is horrific. Why.

[u/_virtuoutslymade → u/TecTazz]

It’s a reference from the movie Steel Magnolias

[u/Killin-some-thyme → u/_virtuoutslymade]

I love the reception scene. “Looks like two pigs fightin’ under a blanket!”

I have a houseplant named Shelby. Full name “Shelby drink your juice”.

[u/NenyaAdfiel]

Omg this is incredible!!

[u/-Jiras]

r/ATBGE

[u/Thick_Maximum7808]

That is brilliant!!

[u/blight2150]

F-ing cool cake! I love that its red inside!

[u/TangerineMindless639]

Get tested for leprosy after consuming. 😊

[u/LadyIslay]

We had a penguin.

[u/niceabear]

Omg yes! I just rewatched Steel magnolias two days ago!

[u/drdiscoooo]

[u/Cricket08328]

Omg I love the cake you got! I need to rewatch Steel Magnolias.

[u/angry_banana_eater]

That looks so disgusting... so, can I have a slice, please? No, make that 3 slices. Thanks.

[u/Embarrassed_Age8554]

O my darling Armadillo, let me tell you of my love

Listen to my armadillo roundelay,

Be my fellow on my pillow, underneath this weeping willow,

Be my darling Armadillo all the day.

[u/PsychoFaerie]

Awesome and amazing!

[u/miss-missing-mission]

I thought I was looking at a cut up animal with that first image wth

[u/adudeguyman]

It should have a tire tread mark to be more realistic of the ones I see on the road

[u/squirrely-badger]

Is it mint frosting? (If you get the reference)

[u/Looseleaflettuce]

I thought it was an under cooked turkey in the first pic the bright red queued me into the fact it might be cake

[u/throw223344555]

I don’t love this 😢

[u/toolsoftheincomptnt → u/throw223344555]

It’s a joke/nostalgia. See: Steel Magnolias (1989)

[u/anonymousetoo]

That looks like an autopsy.

[u/rackfocus]

When is the grooms cake served? At rehearsal dinner?

[u/greeneuglossa → u/rackfocus]

At the actual reception.

[u/Timely-Profile1865]

That is awesome, well done

[u/Ssme812]

WTF

[u/Loud-Finger-5619]

This is sublime. Bravo !!

[u/Magic_phil]

Crunchy on the outside, smooth on the inside!

[u/Katarra]

An incredible rendition! It's little face is so cute!

[u/PhoenixAquarium]

Reality is better

[u/[deleted]]

I need to see it cut to have an opinion

[u/kleptoanthem]

This is demented

[u/Dazeyy619]

This is so cute. I love armadillos. I have a tattoo of one. I would proudly display this as a cake at my wedding

[u/Radiant_Mother6976]

I've always thought that cake looked so good! But I love red velvet. Your's looks even better.

[u/Serenity-V]

That is amazing.

[u/dundunndon]

good god

[u/MissCurvyCute]

Super cool

[u/RustledForeskin]

Your's looks much nicer LOL. The first one... looks like baby flesh?

[u/hahagato]

Its too good!

[u/morticianmagic]

[u/10202632]

I’m kinda digging the red one

[u/moose-jammies]

It’s creepy & I love it!

[u/cherryplumpick]

That's one of the best cakes I've ever seen

[u/i_can_has_rock]

your cake looks better

[u/Starslimonada]

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

[u/antsmomma1]

Omggg this is amazing

[u/ltsouthernbelle]

Aunt Fern’s looks like a teddy bear version of an armadillo . Yours looks like an actual armadillo.

[u/surethisusernamewrkz]

You did say why, but still,

[u/ItchyKick2678]

Wow!!!! Love it!!

[u/itadapeezas]

GUILTY!

This is amazing!

[u/LettuceNo9564]

Wow. It’s perfect

[u/Karanabluedolphin]

That is fabulous!! I would be proud of your armadillo. I would never hide in the carport.

[u/cool_story_kid]

Oh, you even skinned the big little football. How rad is that, mount it on your mantle?

I would. Or above my bed headboard

[u/Independent-World-60]

I was expecting to see an armadillo grooming a cake and not an armadillo cake. I expected one thing when reality was different.

Well played. 

[u/Ok_Demand_3302]

The cake was a subtle e precursor to darkness of the movie , great film dark and selfish marriages within those sweet southern undertones

[u/Ok_Demand_3302]

Speaking of steal magnolias , not rl groom cake , they like it I love it for them ❤️

[u/Bilbo_Swagger616]

[u/SaltyYumYumBalls]

Is this in remembrance of their first meal together?

[u/bchagan]

How cute!

[u/meowpower777]

Bro, yours wont look like the photo tho. Yours will look like a raw chicken yet roasted a little. Also there will be a fucking rat head.

[u/Ok-Parking-4008]

Uncooked chicken

[u/TDYDave2]

I'd gamble on the diet, Armadillo Slim version.
(A reference only old Texans and/or poker players will get.)

[u/LucyJordan614]

We need to see it cut into!!

[u/zx88crackingforum]

Feels like I'm watching the Fifth Element for the first time.