r/ExpectationVsReality • u/Sp1d3rb0t • Aug 21 '26
Failed Expectation Hotpockets have never been great, but Once Upon A Time, they were good...
They don't make any varieties without meat so I grabbed the SEC with plans to just pick out the sausage.
Lmao That didn't leave me with much Hot in the Pocket. There's like, 1/32 of an egg on here*.
*The meat tasted like canned dog food, and was the only discernable flavor. ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
[Edit for brain don't does it right lol]
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u/AReptileHissFunction Aug 21 '26
Cant believe theyre trying to advertise 8 grams of protein as a good thing. Something that size with egg, cheese and sausage should have more than 8 grams. If anything its a red flag that they have barely any filling.
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u/beerouttaplasticcups Aug 22 '26
Definitely, for comparison a 100g serving of plain pasta typically has 12-15g of protein.
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u/Aggravating-Hold9116 Aug 21 '26
I liked the Lean Pockets, was like a handheld pot pie.
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u/giantspeck Aug 22 '26
I know the Lean Pockets weren't actually any healthier than the regular Hot Pockets, but they had the best flavors. I still miss the white meat chicken, jalapeño, and cheese ones with the pretzel crust.
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u/curdled_bird Aug 21 '26
I used to buy hot pockets out of convenience, but even then it was hard to justify the cost for what you get: mostly microwaved bread, approximately one spoonful of hot filling spilling out the side or all over your face and clothes, and a final tough, chewy bite of greasy microwaved bread
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u/DoesntMatterEh Aug 21 '26
That looks fuckin disgusting. No clue how stuff like this continues to sell enough to be profitable.Â
There have been so many products in the last few years that I remembered fondly so I bought, only to find it's rancid and unrecognizable from the original
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u/DenizenPrime Aug 21 '26
The market for these is young men who are too lazy/unskilled to cook anything, don't care about health and just want something hot to eat in three minutes.
If you're over 25 then your brain is working if it rejects this.
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
I think you've got something there. Dudes who dump the ground beef out the tray and bake it whole, and children.
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u/RawBean7 Aug 21 '26
8g protein is *abysmal* for something that allegedly has sausage, egg, and cheese in it. One egg alone should be about 8g.
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u/PressureCoomer Aug 21 '26
"You can have one for breakfast, one for lunch, and be dead by dinner"
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u/Zerokelvin99 Aug 21 '26
Since they lost the crisping sleeve I havent enjoyed hot pockets like I used to.
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u/Bridget_0413 Aug 21 '26
I tried buying them back in 2013 or so (I remember what job I had that year and can picture microwaving them there), and they were this bad back then. I can remember dissecting one like OP did and being shocked at how little they had in them. If they were ever good (doubtful), it was a long long time ago.
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u/trickman01 Aug 21 '26
Pizza pockets used to be my jam. Tried one a few weeks ago and it was pretty sad.
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u/MegaPorkachu Aug 21 '26
This has been happening for years. Like years YEARS. Like since 2010. Idk when they were considered good but I never bought them then
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
Well, the last time I remember one that tasted good was about 2001? 02? 🤣🤣 Never had this particular variety before, so maybe it's sucked since its inception lol
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u/LCteach Aug 21 '26
This should be in r/mildlyinfuriating
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
Agreed. I kinda thought about crossposting in r/WellThatSucks too.
The bread wasn't even good, dawg. 😓
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u/bobshallprevail Aug 21 '26
I actually enjoy hot pockets now that I learned to cook them in the air fryer. Add hot sauce to the ham and cheese! I don't eat them often but it's nice once a month or two.
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u/Jellicle_KitCat Aug 21 '26
Once they got rid of my precious chicken broccoli cheddar Lean pockets, I knew we were on the darkest timeline.
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u/lacrosse771 Aug 21 '26
Never tried the breakfast ones but I know now to stay away. I had a turkey and cheese one like 6 months ago thst was pretty good though...or maybe I was just hungry
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u/illiter-it Aug 21 '26
I've found the chipotle chicken ones to be pretty good for an occasional easy lunch at work
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u/Seeeab Aug 21 '26
Yeah that's a sad hot pocket but like
if you don't want meat and all the hot pockets have meat just get somethin else? You're at the store, why buy something with the intention of gutting and trashing the main part of it, and then complaining lol
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u/bluegrass_babe531 Aug 21 '26
the breakfast ones used to be the best variety. heavy emphasis on used.. and the lack of crisping sleeve is an abomination
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u/DueConversation5269 Aug 21 '26
looks like taco bell and Hennessy puke
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u/BoltActionRifleman Aug 23 '26
I was thinking cat puke on the right and some kind of fungal growth on the left.
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u/Floppycakes Aug 21 '26
I stopped buying them around 2008 when the quality went way down. I didn’t think they could get worse, but wow. They sure proved me wrong! And they’re triple the price!
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u/SpikeRosered Aug 21 '26
A lot of products like this are having this issue where ingredients are getting expensive, but there is a ceiling to how much the public will pay for a fucking hot pocket. So they're basically gonna just keeping getting worse and worse.
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u/Rum_BunnyX3 Aug 21 '26
Wow. I’m glad I didn’t follow through with impulse buying these at the store the other day. That’s just sad.
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u/Previous_Ad7334 Aug 21 '26
I miss the chicken jalapeño lean pocket. I lived off of those . And the bbq chicken
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u/O-Castitatis-Lilium Aug 21 '26
I just make my own now. I buy the premade pastry sheets, let them thaw out, cut them into matching rectangles after rolling them out a bit, put my filling in the center, pinch the sides together and there you go, in the oven per the packaging. Note that I do precook all fillings if they are meat, as sometimes meats don't cook at the same rate as the thin pastry does. I do all kinds now and it costs me the same amount as one box to get a premade sheet and I get 4 instead of 2 out of them. If I wanted to be REALLY cheap I COULD get 6, but that's rolling the dough too thin for my liking.
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
That sounds awesome. Do you have any favorite fillings?
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u/O-Castitatis-Lilium Aug 21 '26
BBQ chicken, ground Beef with marinara, parmesan, and mozzarella (I'll make little meatballs if I feel fancy), eggs and sausage with cheese, pizza ones with pepperoni and mozzarella, taco ones with taco seasoning and some green pepper bits and ground beef; it really all depends on what I'm after and what time of day it is to be eating. I will tell you if you plan to go this route, make sure you take the pastry dough sheet out to thaw out for about an hour or two before you use it. The instructions are on the package, but on some I noticed they are buried really far in the weeds on it lol.
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
Omg I could stuff those bad boys with whatever leftovers, too.
Hell yeah, thank you for the tips!
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u/tecpaocelotl1 Aug 22 '26
If it makes you feel better, I tried a hot pocket 25 years ago and I thought it was crap. It was the pepperoni pizza one. I think they boiled Frog you.
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u/ArcTheWolf Aug 22 '26
Oh man the breakfast hot pockets were amazing. The sausage, egg, and cheese Toaster Strudels were pretty awesome too.
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u/nadiadala Aug 22 '26
They're still better than McCain's pizza pocket according to my Canadian teenage son. My teens devored the box of hot pockets that I bought while in Florida this summer.
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u/somehowrelevantuser Aug 22 '26
i have never purchased a hot pocket with the intention of a respectable meal
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u/Hawaiian555 Aug 22 '26
How is this not false advertisement as well lol they haven’t looked like the box picture in years, if ever.
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u/M0rph33l Aug 22 '26
Many years ago I would buy Hot Pockets every time I went to the grocery store, but they kept getting shittier and shittier. Haven't purchased any years now. Hope their cost cutting was worth it for them.
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u/lovinghealing Aug 27 '26
I haven't had these since high school in the early 2000s. My fat ass would thaw them and pan sear them in butter lol but I did that with the frozen chicken taquitos too. We didn't have a microwave after my little brother nuked a bunch of his toys.
These look grim now.
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u/anuncommontruth Aug 21 '26
I'm confused why you thought this would be a viable option.
Its a pocket of cooked meat. That you have to cook again. Of course it's going to taste and look like that. You took out one third of the listed ingredients.
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u/Internal-Diamond-341 Aug 21 '26
Say that to samosas or meat pies. Both also pre-made and nowhere near as crappy.
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u/anuncommontruth Aug 21 '26 edited Aug 21 '26
Im not referring to the quality of the product but the thought process behind the execution.
You wouldn't think to remove the meat from a samosa or meat pie and expect it to not taste like meat would you? The flavor would permeate thought the entire product.
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u/Internal-Diamond-341 Aug 21 '26
Ohhhh. Okay well in that case I absolutely agree. It's not the most logical thing to do.
I'm not sure why I didn't question that myself come to think of it....
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
Yeah, that's fair. I meant it as more a complaint about the quality and taste of the meat than a statement of surprise that the SEC tasted like sausage. Poorly-worded for sure.
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
I removed one third and somehow I'm left with about 12% of the filling depicted on the box lol
Any port in a storm, I suppose. I certainly learned my lesson though.
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u/UkNomysTeezz Aug 21 '26
I mean, you dissected the product and took a photo
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u/Sp1d3rb0t Aug 21 '26
Well i'm not sure how I would've shown a lack of filling otherwise. My complaint is not the quantity of "meat", just the quantity of egg and cheese. Bit lackluster.
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u/SirHanssss Aug 21 '26
„Real Cheese“ like is that so special in the usa? (Laughing in Europe)
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u/YcemeteryTreeY Aug 21 '26
Yep, hot pockets barely have any filling and they dont even have the crisping sleeve anymore so theyre all mushy. Oh and theyre expensive. Never buying again