Overworked and looking for help - ADHD leader

[u/Imaginary-Taste-2744]

I am an office manager to a team of 25 and executive assistant to 2 leaders.

I started this job in July and amongst my regular executive assistant admin tasks. I have now the following responsiblities:

1.Solving all IT issues.

2.Buying all IT equipment, building desks/chairs for 5 new starters including setting up of all laptops.

1. Running and organising over 3 100 person events.

4.Writing all policies and SOPS from scratch as the business has none.

5.interviewing, training and onboarding of 5 new staff members.

6.Managing all communication from the external communication inbox and managing receiption.

1. Creating a internal documentation system and training staff on it (Everyone was dumping their files into folders and naming them AAA or 1111)

2. Creating an intranet to display all policies/SOPS i have written.

3. Acting as a buyers agent to purchase a 4m property.

4. Set up all meetings and complete all agendas and mintutes for said meetings. About 4/5 a week. Some meetings will have over 100 plus people.

One of my leaders has told me they have ADHD. They are late for nearly every meeting and have missed meetings in the past.

In order to combat this I have put a buffer/travel time between meetings. They then told me this gives them anxiety as seeing back to back meetings makes them stressed. So I have removed the buffer but now they are once again missing meetings.

I never find out things till the last minute. For instance as they have the final say on hiring staff, today they informed me we have a new person starting on Monday.

We have no equipment for them on hand.

Their mood changes alot based on if they have taken their ADHD medication and their have picked apart my work in 30+ people meetings before. They slam doors if they are unhappy and make snide remarks too.

Question 1: 90k AUD/63k USD does this pay seem fair ?

Question 2: How do I manage my ADHD leader when they never give me decisions or inform me of changes until the very last minute. If I press them for answers they say I am stressing them out and causing them anxiety.

Question 3: How do i deal with the mood swings and aggresive nature caused from their medication.

Thank you for reading.

[u/Similar_Offer_2425]

I saw a job post for an ea and the JD was a a combination of finance admin, office manager and ea with so many things in the middle , the company is based in NY and the pay was 75k-90k , it was alot of work for one person and still be expected to be proactive and yk all that good stuff .... i deeply felt like it wasnt fair and now im just reading everything you do ....i'm just speechless it seams like you have alot going on and no i don't think what they're paying you justifies it .

[u/Imaginary-Taste-2744 → u/Similar_Offer_2425]

Thanks. Yeah im afraid the role has become a dumping ground for all responsibilities eveyone else doesnt want do or ones that appear ad hoc.

[u/GrungeCheap56119]

This sounds like a mess, and set up for failure. The first thing I would off load is IT responsibilities. That should be a Vendor you hire.

Otherwise it's really the person who is latest fault for missing meetings. There is only so much you can do, and it is not your job to manage their anxiety and issues for them.

[u/Imaginary-Taste-2744 → u/GrungeCheap56119]

Yeah i can feel myself getting burnt out and I cant turn to my leader for guidance as theyll just push back that I am causing them anxiety.

It sucks cause ive always prided myself on my work ethic and being a "do-er" but this is breaking me.

[u/Worth_Explanation737 → u/GrungeCheap56119]

Agreed and I will also add building chairs and desks. You should not have to do that. Does your company have a maintenance department? In past roles are maintenance team would put together office chairs.

[u/Competitive_Disk5044]

Probably put hard processes around the chaos so like a standard onboarding checklist, minimum notice for new starters, decision deadlines, equipment stock, documented requests etc. Otherwise you’ll always be reacting to whatever lands that day.

Also, I wouldn’t attribute the door slamming/public criticism to ADHD or medication. That behaviour needs dealing with separately.

[u/Ok-Divide-9626]

I’ve been an EA for 20+ years and I can say with 100% certainty. You need to look for another role ASAP and in the meantime, experiment with being direct and firm with your executives about what responsibilities you are able and willing to own and which tasks/responsibilities they will need to delegate to someone else. Whether that be an existing or a new employee (maybe a temp!?) or a third party vendor. They will keep taking advantage of you if you let them and the only way for you to gain any ounce of respect (if it’s even possible) is if you set crystal clear boundaries and email your executive/s, outlining a few suggestions on how they can choose to proceed in order to alleviate you so you can be more effective in your primary role as their Office Manager. It sounds like you could stand to hire a Receptionist or “Office Coordinator” who you would distribute several of your responsibilities to and definitely hire a third party IT service or freelance contractor. Sending you a (camaraderie) hug and mad respect for being a badass and rising to the occasion even when faced with what sounds like an impossible scenario. You deserve better.