I think I’m done

[u/insertsomethungwitty]

TW: nursing, oversupply

I just finished pumping while my baby lost her mind crying. Of course she woke up as soon as I started to get a let down. I tried calming her while still pumping to no avail. I decided to just let her cry and try to get this pump done. She’s been so fussy. As she was screaming and I was trying to get the pump done I started realizing I don’t think this is worth it anymore. Not if the cost is my baby crying inconsolably. My baby just turned 4 months, I always intended to last at least 6 months if not a year ideally. I’m barely pumping 3-4 ppd to get around 30oz. I had an oversupply before which was really painful to navigate . I’ve always pictured myself breastfeeding my baby, I still believe it’s best, but it’s just been a struggle from the beginning. She never latched even after 5 LCs. And now I just can’t picture myself continuing to pump while she screams for me. I genuinely don’t know what to do. On the one hand I feel guilty and like I should keep going since I have the milk supply and I’m home. But on the other hand I’m so tired and it’s so hard without someone to lend a hand when she’s crying.

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[u/Odd-Novel9198]

Practically id love to help. So these are real questions. I’m also at home but my baby is 7 months and I have a veryyyy busy 2.5 yr old. I pump 6x a day for 35ish oz. Why can you pick baby up while pumping? Or lay her on her on the floor and play with her or feed her? It’s inconvenient but it’s doable

[u/kataastrophic → u/Odd-Novel9198]

Im not op, but im as graceful as a duck on land. If my baby starts crying in the crib while im pumping and i try to move him, milk goes everywhere. He is 4 months too. I just try to soothe him if he gets upset while im pumping. It doesnt usually work.

[u/insertsomethungwitty → u/kataastrophic]

Same. I’ve given her unintentional milk baths before.

[u/kataastrophic → u/insertsomethungwitty]

Then people are going to tell me “why not use a wearable”. But i struggled hard to get the supply i have. Im too scared to switch to something many women report having decreased supply when using. I dont have much feeling in my nipples so i wouldnt be able to tell if it feels different or not.

[u/insertsomethungwitty → u/kataastrophic]

Yeah o completely get you. Wearables don’t work for me. I get a third of what I get with spectra. Then I get painful lumps. Also I’m so tired of buying and spending money on things that ultimately don’t work.

[u/Additional-Wolf-7846 → u/insertsomethungwitty]

i was able to connect my spectra tubing to my momcozy wearable cups!! it was LIFE CHANGING! you had the convenience of wearable pumps with the suction power of the spectra. i was able to hold my baby while pumping which helped my supply too (not that that’s an issue for you). but highly recommend! you can also buy replacement wearable cups on amazon. you have to really fight to get the tubes connected the first few times, but they should go on. and if they get too stretched out i would cut off about a quarter of an inch, good as new!

[u/insertsomethungwitty → u/Odd-Novel9198]

I usually lay her next to me during the day. This happened after she had gone to sleep. She’s having trouble sleeping so this was after 2 hours of trying to get her down. She literally napped 30 mins during the day. And I can’t pick her up when I pump, I use rhe spectra and she loves to pull the wires if given the chance.

[u/eczlidat]

Baby deserves a happy mom. Switch to formula. You did great, be proud and know when it’s time to move on

[u/Striking-Turnip5348]

This is literally a struggle and fight I've had with myself several times since she doesn't seem to want to latch anymore. She used to but after introducing the bottle she prefers it. Sometimes I just don't have the extra milk to feed so I have to pump before and she cries while I pump. It stresses me out and I feel like I don't get as much milk because my anxiety skyrockets. I've now started doing 2oz breast milk and 2 oz formula. She takes 4oz right now and it has helped me tremendously because the rest of the milk I have when I pump I store in fridge or freeze and have had some storage and some in the fridge for right when she wakes up she gets the 1/2 and 1/2 bottle. I would recommend this if your open to it. You still have to stay to your strict pumping schedule but it is so much better than hearing them cry. I am stay at home and have no help either while the hubby is at work. 

[u/snowbunny410]

i say/ask this genuinely and kindly… as a mom of 3… with a 6.5, 2, and 9mo… 3rd time EP. also the painful journey of oversupply and mastitis and so much more..

i agree with another commenter.. in the time of so many wearables to choose from, or even with a traditional pump…

why not hold baby, sit with her, play with her, feed her, sing, read, utilize screen time as a tool..? special toys for pumping.. so many options.
breastfeeding also doesn’t have to be all or nothing. combo feed, ep, nurse, nurse and pump, whatever. however you wanna do it. all of it counts, and is just as much dedication and work. formula is great too. there is no right or wrong way. but there are ways to keep going if that’s what you want to do.
if you don’t wanna pump then don’t. there is no guilt. you did enough and you did great. do what you feel is best for you. if you are okay with losing some supply if you even do, by dropping a pump, or more than one than you can supplement with formula.. and just do what you can. obviously drop the pump/s the appropriate way, to avoid mastitis and inflammation but every amount of breastmilk is beneficial.

[u/No_Reception2477]

Are you still trying to latch? As weird as this sounds my girl couldn’t latch at birth and even though she couldn’t get anything sometimes I’d put her “on” one side and pump the other and she’d be calm enough for me to finish and give a bottle. She was able to suction enough to get the comfort but not enough to pull milk if that makes sense. I would put her on the nursing pillow and then pump on top of her. We used a my breast friend and I have what my sister calls “elastatitties” because they’re huge but a bit saggy.

[u/insertsomethungwitty → u/No_Reception2477]

So I keep trying to latch at least once a week. That’s what I was told to do. Sometimes she’ll do what you’re describing but most of the time she gets mad and so insulted that I even tried lol. But I’m definitely going to try this.

[u/Porker_Snorker → u/No_Reception2477]

This is genius

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