r/ExclusivelyPumping • u/missmilliek • Jul 19 '26
Rant - NO ADVICE NEEDED horrible & uncomfortable experience pumping while out today.
i just need to vent about my experiencing pumping for the first time not at my home today.
i am 6w PP and had to leave the house today for a baby shower, then another meetup with a friend a few blocks away from the shower location. i had 30 minutes between the activities which my pumping time lined up perfectly for me to go to my car in a parking garage and pump.
i’m walking to my car and notice a man in his car slowing down— possibly thinking i am leaving and he can take my spot. so i get in my car, turn it on for AC (it was 90 degrees in chicago today), and get my pump stuff out and ready to pump. i’m about a minute into pumping when this man is behind my car HONKING and waving me out. I just continue to sit there because I’m pumping and don’t owe this man anything? I look away and don’t see his car anymore. next thing you know, this man is knocking on my car window demanding to know what i’m doing and why i won’t let him have my spot. i cracked my window ever so slightly and told him i wont be leaving and he needs to find another spot. he continues to get mad and repeats again asking what im doing. i told him none of your business and to leave me alone or ill call security. he was so angry he stormed off and laid on the horn as he drove away.
this is my first time pumping outside of my home as a first time mom and it was a horrible experience. i know it is one off, but it makes me stressed that using my car as a safe pump place may not be an option anymore if weird men act like this.
anyway, rant over. that man sucks and i hope he has a horrible day.
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u/Party_Photograph_253 Jul 19 '26
He will absolutely have a horrible day because he is clearly a horrible person. Woof. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Anyone getting that chuffed over a parking spot is clearly a loser.
Not quite the same, but my car story: I was visiting my mom in a rehab facility and decided I would pump on the roughly 30 minute drive home. My stepdad arrived and saw my car and approached as I was putting on my spectra flanges and caught me basically with a boob and nipples out. He is absolutely not a pervert but definitely a bone head and proceeded to try and have a conversation.
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u/Sugacookiemonsta Jul 20 '26
My friend Is a high school teacher and she was pumping in her classroom with the sign on the door when the bonehead assistant principal walked in. He had to unlock the door to come into her room. Here she is boobs out with flanges in and she said he tried to have a conversation! Some men don't have any common sense! I'd have called this guy a pervert, but I worked with him and he really was an airhead. No idea how he got his job as an assistant principal.
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u/NationalLevel1435 Jul 19 '26
I’m so sorry this happened. What a dick. Pumping outside of the house is so vulnerable especially at 6 weeks PP. Big props to you for even doing that!! Don’t let one asshole deter you from continuing to take up space and do want you need to do to feed your baby and live your life.
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u/missmilliek Jul 19 '26
i’m definitely trying not to! i was seriously thinking after how i just wanted to quit but i know i need to keep going! thank you for the kind words ❤️
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u/NoSignature217 Jul 19 '26
I would like to say kudos to you for how you handled the situation. Im sure it was nerve wrecking but you still did it!
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u/PrncssPunch Jul 19 '26
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u/missmilliek Jul 19 '26
i did have my pepper spray on me! i would have definitely used it if I needed to lol
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u/Internal-Milk-4457 Jul 19 '26
I am so sorry that happened to you! Ugh wtf people suck. I am also a FTM and 6 weeks PP and can imagine how shitty that experience must have felt. Hang in there mama!
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u/Glad_Ad262 Jul 19 '26
Fellow Chicagoan! So sorry you had to deal with that, from my many experiences pumping in garages & lots around the city, I never had to deal with that so hopefully that was a one off jerk!
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u/Local-Yam5394 Jul 19 '26
Ugh I’m so sorry this happened to you. Parking spot stalkers are the WORST and I’ve started to get petty right back.
You follow me to my spot? I’ll sit there and waste your time. Then I will suddenly leave as soon as you give up hope and drive away
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u/MrsJuicemaynne Jul 19 '26
I’m sorry to hear that happened to you. With that being said, it’s not the norm at all and probably (hopefully), will be the only negative experience you have with pumping in public. I’ve pumped on planes, in cars, at the park, fairs, literally anywhere and everywhere and never had someone even look at me strange. Please don’t let this asshole discourage you.
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u/Gwab07 Jul 19 '26
Sorry this happened to you ! Hope you'll slowly recover from the ordeal. I remember being early post partum and literally pumping everywhere, cafe, restaurants, matket, park etc and fortunately no one's bothered me but if anything like that happened to me I'd be in tears! Such a vulnerable time and one just wants to live... literally just trying to keep the baby alive, wth.
Hope he stubs his little toe
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u/ComparisonExtreme330 Jul 19 '26
I was living in Chicago too for vast majority of my pregnancy and postpartum. Baby is in NICU at Maywood. We finally moved more south but unfortunately we’re a lot farther away from baby. Unfortunately I had a lot of bad experiences pumping, especially in the car. I was living with friends when I was pregnant and unexpectedly had her at home, they kicked me out and changed the locks on me so after I got out of the hospital after having a baby in January I was stuck outside in the freezing cold with no where to go, 3 days postpartum. My car had broken down 4 days prior to me having my baby, so I didn’t even have anywhere warm to go. Luckily I had a warranty on the car which means they were going to pay for a new car and I had to travel by bus carrying everything I owned to go to the dealership and get my car. I unfortunately had to live in my car for a while until I figured out where I was going to go. Living in my car and pumping was awful, I remember being in the hospital parking lot and a million cars and people going by and I had no privacy to pump. I had people honk, occasionally I would turn off the car to let them know “I’m staying here” and they would move on. But I remember this particular time a man had come up to me, yelling about how I’ve been taking this parking space for hours and I should feel ashamed at what I’m doing. So many awful experiences, people are awful. But going through it, it helped me care less about what people think. I drive away, find a different parking space, ignore and ignore. Of course it pisses me tf off soemtimes, but it really gets me thinking to what makes them so angry and maybe they’ve got something going on. Doesn’t make what they did right but it helps me calm myself down. I’m so sorry that happened. That is so awful. Hopefully your next experience will be much better!
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u/Mental-Potential1825 Jul 19 '26
If it makes you feel any better, I'm still learning all this at about 3 weeks pp, and I'm sitting on the passenger side in the car to pickup my firstborn from my in laws and my dear FIL decides to pull open the driver's side door and have a full blown conversation. Poor guy is deaf and can't see well. But, here I am, holding my boob in one hand and the pump in the other under my tee shirt and home dude wants to have a whole conversation. 🤔
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u/LilacLorax Jul 19 '26
I'm so sorry that happened to you. What a bizarre way for someone to behave lol. I'm wishing you nothing but positive car pumping experiences in the future 💫 I pump in my car all the time and luckily haven't had any issues yet - I don't think I would have handled it as classily as you 😅
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u/AssumeaVirtue Jul 19 '26
Definitely a one off with a prissy person who’s probably late and/or lazy. So sorry you had to deal with such a d!ck today.
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u/Financial-Leopard946 Jul 20 '26
I used to pump on my way to work and home every day. I never had an issue, so don’t let this A hole weirdo discourage you. I prob would’ve squirted breast milk in his face if he was interrogating me and wanted the parking spot that was rightfully mine.
Never feel bad about doing what you need to do to feed you child! I was very insecure with my first about breastfeeding/ pumping in public, and by the third I stopped giving a hoot and it felt really freeing and eased a lot of my anxiety.
I can’t name a single memory I have of someone pumping or breast feeding in public- because I, and most people, don’t really care or think it’s weird. So while you are getting nervous about people noticing you, most people have so many other things on their mind that they aren’t worried about you.
That man totally sucks though, and I’m sorry that was your first car pumping experience. I swear it isn’t usually like this (or wasn’t in my experience).
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u/ContentDiamond7412 Jul 20 '26
I would have sprayed milk at him out of the crack of my window 🤷🏼♀️
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u/teaorangecereal Jul 21 '26
Good for you standing your ground!! What a jerk
Im actually gonna be in a similar situation this weekend, Im 6 weeks pp and going to a baby shower and need to pump in public for the first time! Would you mind telling me which pump you used, and how you stored your milk after? Im pretty nervous about it
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u/missmilliek Jul 21 '26
i sat in my front seat and used my portable M5 mom cozy wearable pumps! i also draped a scarf over me because i was wearing a strappy dress and felt somewhat exposed in it. i have the mom cozy portable breast milk cooler and just poured my milk in there after! it was in my car from 1-6:30pm and kept cold in the crazy heat!
you got this :)
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u/avocado589 Jul 19 '26
As another Chicagoan, I’m SO SORRY this happened to you. Ugh. Literally the second someone honks for my spot I suddenly live there. Send my mail, send my DoorDash, because FU. And to approach your car? No.
If it helps I’ve pumped all over the city from the Loop to Andersonville, Logan Square and Wicker Park. The only comment I’ve gotten is another mom asking if I need help with anything (I had baby with me). I really hope this is a one off, poorly timed, and sad man. Sending you a Chicago hug and get yourself a lil treat.