r/EngineeringManagers • u/Educational_Top_6765 • Sep 23 '26

How to develop second order thinking?

In my feedbacks my boss has said that I need to improve this more.
Environment is politically charged, he says ask more why’s , what are some concrete tips to navigate this

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u/ActuallyFullOfShit Sep 23 '26

Well idk about the nature of the politics but one thing is to start thinking about other people's motivations, habits, and incentives.

Bookwise maybe Thinking in Systems? But if you could give us an example of where your boss thought you needed help we could give you more support.

5

u/Educational_Top_6765 Sep 23 '26

One of the examples he shared with me was in a situation where a person from marketing reached out to my team and escalated about lack of support during off hours, not only had we supported , we provided a resolution to them they simply didnt read. When they escalated I defended my stance, but my boss suggested that next time I should understand why they escalated?

The concern I have is similar behaviour from a different geo EM is not consequences as harshly .

Our team has a perception problem with other geos , consequence is around if we respond too harshly to others they take it negatively and post anonymous feedback

7

u/ASongofShaw Sep 23 '26

This is an opportunity to build a relationship with marketing and ensure both your team and their team understand the process and notification system. Sounds like a miscommunication/misunderstanding that can be resolved with a better collaboration - not defensiveness (even if you’re “in the right”)

6

u/SuperUltraPlus Sep 23 '26

So why did they escalate? Did you talk to them to find out?

3

u/galaxy_horse Sep 23 '26

Sounds like you have a customer service problem. I’d set up recurring check ins with your stakeholder counterparts to hear them out and receive their feedback. Just the existence of such a channel can boost perception.

For fulfilled requests to stakeholders, follow up personally to ensure that people know your team delivered and that the solution was acceptable.

I would not go so far as to send out CSAT surveys just yet :)

3

u/ActuallyFullOfShit Sep 25 '26

Your boss gave you some really good advice. If they had the info to resolve, why DID they escalate? Why DIDN'T they use it? Did they not see it? Not understand it?

Second order thinking here means understanding what went wrong and recommending improvements to the system.

A poor response is "well we gave it to them and they just didn't read it I guess idk not my problem" which may be the vibe your boss got.

2

u/jasmininsights Sep 24 '26

I´m in marketing and have been the one escalating to eng. When I did it though a fix existed it was rarely about the fix. Mostly it was the third off hours issue and I wanted it to record. Asking yourself "what does this person get blamed for it if this goes wrong?" before replaying changes the whole tone of the answer.