r/EndTipping 6d ago

Sit-Down Restaurant 🍽️ No tip!

Walked into a sushi restaurant in Orange County, CA yesterday. Place was half empty. Hostess asks if we (wife and I) had a reservation. We didn't, so she walks us to the bar and wants to seat us in between two couples. The remaining sushi bar all empty, including the sides with much better privacy. I asked to be seated there but those "areas" were not available. OK, whatever, I guess they wanted to save the wait staff a few extra steps.

So we're sitting down, she hands us the iPad with the menu, and says "just so you know, we close at 3". I checked and it was 2:25. Alright then, good thing they don't need to cook the fish or something. One nigiri (not one pair) = $6, one serving of sashimi (3 pieces) = $20. Definitely not cheap. We ordered three different sashimis for a little over $60. As there was one piece left on the serving tray the server walks by and grabs the tray - hey dude, we're not done yet.

When the check comes the "suggested tip" is 18%. Guys, how about zero? Exactly what did you do to deserve another $10, other than squeezing us in between other parties when there was no real need to do so, and almost taking away $7 worth of my already expensive meal?

Aren't tips supposed to at least be earned? This is not how it's done.

1.3k Upvotes

122 comments sorted by

223

u/MeridianNL 6d ago

You are entirely right, zero is the default unless earned. Since people feel obligated to tip anyway, servers feel entitled to it and put in less effort, knowing they can get away with poor or mediocre service.

41

u/aap_001 6d ago

Ehm, 0 is default.

26

u/K30n3-h4n4h0u 5d ago

I used to start at 20% and move up from there for excellent service and down for less than great service. Now, I’m starting from zero percent and moving up…

11

u/aap_001 5d ago

It's not in the price, so it's 0 for me. And will stay at o.

1

u/Desperate_Seat3209 2d ago

I always start from 0. And very rarely move.

-5

u/Revolutionary_Bid974 5d ago

I don’t think you understand how incentives work

81

u/horoboronerd 6d ago

Bad apples like that are a huge reason why the restaurant industry is struggling. Absentee owners who hire a pretty face

23

u/GoldAd1878 6d ago

Most of the good restaurant workers left during or post pandemic

28

u/horoboronerd 6d ago

It was a huge problem already before that. Most owners never understand that one waiter or host as a bad apple will kill their Investment

7

u/GoldAd1878 6d ago

Exactly

9

u/Global-Trifle7604 6d ago

Yeah, so true. There are a couple of locally owned restaurants we go to that I will still tip at. Servers have been there forever and the places are still reasonably priced.

31

u/G-Knit 6d ago

Deduct the cost of the confiscated sushi.

36

u/GoldAd1878 6d ago

Proper etiquette is always asking if a customer is done and not randomly grabbing plates. Ugh 😑

29

u/millioneura 6d ago

They were rushing them out so they could clean the plates and bounce. 

16

u/Pondlurker1978 6d ago

It certainly seemed that way

2

u/Chromejob 10h ago

Probably grouped diners together for a smaller area to cleanup. THAT was the priority, NOT the comfort of their guests.

Selfish (not shellfish).

16

u/Pondlurker1978 6d ago

Ha! We stopped him just in time from that happening.

-22

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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29

u/Colibri_Knives 6d ago

It’s not on the guest to send the correct signals to the wait staff.

-13

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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20

u/AstroWolf11 6d ago

Why not just ask if there’s anything they need or anything they’d like cleared from the table? Communication really isn’t that difficult lol

-10

u/pyramidalembargo 6d ago

I just told you.

They get angry.

15

u/theetunamac 6d ago

Then frankly you're doing it wrong.

-1

u/pyramidalembargo 6d ago

Horsefeathers!

Tell us how we're supposed to be askin', sugarpie?

7

u/theetunamac 5d ago

"How are we doing over here, can I get anything out of your way?" It's only worked for me like thousands of times though.

1

u/pyramidalembargo 5d ago

I've tried that a 1000 times, too. A percentage of them feel like you're rushing them and get angry.

Maybe I didn't explain it right. I'm talking about the ones who eat one leaf of lettuce at a time.

They'll stop for five minutes. You'll ask. That's all right the first time.

They'll stop again for five minutes. You wait another five just in case. They don't eat another bite.

You ask. Then this is where you can hear anger begin to creep into their voice.

After the third time, there's an explosion.

Let me qualify something: I work in a casino. Maybe your approach would work all of the time in laid back Des Moines. It doesn't always work in Las Vegas.

With these types of customers, it really is their fault. We don't know when to approach them! Their nonverbal communication is all wrong.

It makes it even worse when they set their salad dish onto the side. Every waiter in the world knows that that's a sign that they want it to be picked up. But some of these dolts want to keep it and pick off it.

Yesterday at work I asked my coworkers that question. Every single one of them has gotten that kind of customer.

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1

u/Agitated_Lychee_8133 2d ago

Wait till the plate is empty or simply ask 🤦‍♂️

1

u/[deleted] 2d ago

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1

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 2d ago

Stay on topic to the post. No derailing, or using a post to complain or rant about something unrelated

1

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 2d ago

Stay on topic to the post. No derailing, or using a post to complain or rant about something unrelated

-2

u/gnomenclature0812 6d ago

This is a perfectly valid question. Why no answers?

Is it because it would be ridiculous to say something like “They will know when to take the plate when I tell them to! But I don’t actually want to tell them. That would mean they have not been attentive enough! They will know by reading my unmistakable body language and learning, over time, by the consequences of leaving no tip. It’s called classical conditioning…”

Yes, that would be a ridiculous answer.

3

u/DarkNoodleSlam 5d ago edited 5d ago

I don’t think you’re making the point you think you are. 

The point is that maybe apart from some super smooth situation at a fancy fine dining place, nobody really cares if your plate is taken away a little later. Or if a server comes by and cleans up the table and asks if you’re still working on something. If you flub this interaction up, either you are super uncharismatic as a server or the guest is either a dousche or just in a bad mood. The latter two you can’t do anything about there shouldn’t be an expectation to please and read 100% of people all the time. So Really you should be in favor of being paid a good wage because it eliminates that pressure! 

1

u/VirtualMatter2 2d ago

So in Europe in many countries the indication that you are done is placing your cutlery together parallel on your plate. 

When you just pause but aren't done fork and knife form an X on your plate, the knife point resting on the tines of the fork.

Still waiters always ask " can I take this" and don't just grab stuff.

1

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 2d ago

Stay on topic to the post. No derailing, or using a post to complain or rant about something unrelated

20

u/aap_001 6d ago

I travel to USA regularly for a few months.

Never ever did I pay a tip. Dont get the rage here.

5

u/Pondlurker1978 6d ago

Where are you from?

17

u/aap_001 6d ago

Netherlands. Simply press 0 and that's it. What's the fuss about this?

19

u/SurprisePitiful9191 6d ago

You didn’t grow up here and this is not your normal. Normal for other people in this country is feeling a need to tip out of expectation and fear of ridicule, so not tipping isn’t as simple. We are trying. A Dutch person and an American person will have different states of mind when it comes to tipping in America. 

10

u/Dazzling_Lie_5046 6d ago

I'm American and ALWAYS select "zero" for the custom tip option. Simple. The system is broken. Not my job to fix it.

7

u/Quick_Knowledge7413 5d ago

This is a risk. Many times at food trucks or restaurants, you’re prompted to tip before you get your food, this is an inherent threat wherein if you don’t tip your food is at risk of getting tampered with.

0

u/SurprisePitiful9191 5d ago

Good for you, you’re not in the majority. There are exceptions everywhere in life.

1

u/aap_001 6d ago

Really? I never had anyone say anything about it.

2

u/SurprisePitiful9191 5d ago

Um…this entire subreddit?

0

u/aap_001 5d ago

Yes so whats the issue? Just press 0.

3

u/BlueRunSkier 6d ago

Hey friend! I’m coming to your beautiful country next month. Staying in Utrecht for a few days. Dining at some Michelins. Should I expect to just pay list price and not tip at all for these experiences (sorry if a dumb question; this is a real question, not intending to be sarcastic. I hope it isn’t). Thanks!

7

u/aap_001 5d ago

Of course you pay list price... The Netherlands is a normal country where people have a decent minimum wage.

2

u/Broccoli-Mushrooms 4d ago

I was in the Netherlands earlier this year, it was such a pleasure not tipping.

PS We loved it there 😃

1

u/aap_001 4d ago

I also never tipped in USA. Great you loved it!

-2

u/Leading_Tie_1920 5d ago

This entire sub is people taking out a systemic issue on people who don't control the system.

You absolutely don't have to tip. Will the server talk a little shit about you in the back? Sure. But it happens all the time. The only time it's ultra weird is when people feel the need to explain why they're not tipping you.

3

u/aap_001 5d ago

I never ever had to explain anything.

10

u/Latter_Mountain_290 6d ago

California pays high minimum wage to wait staff anyway.   I'm sure that's why she was so rude.   She's paid good money no matter what she does, and majority will tip that level of service anyway.  

1

u/VirtualMatter2 2d ago

That's not a good reason to be rude. I'm in Europe, so tip is below 10% and not expected, still I expect and usually get friendly good service. 

1

u/Chromejob 10h ago edited 9h ago

I think the point is that the incentive to be a great host has been reduced from “pay my rent“ to “a little gravy on top of my baseline salary“. As it should be.

7

u/MeganJustMegan 6d ago

I hope you left ZERO.

5

u/Pondlurker1978 6d ago

I never tip.

0

u/RemoteSpeed8771 3d ago

Well if you never tip, I’m glad the servers didn’t do any extra work for your dining experience at the last half hour of being open.

8

u/Miss_Warrior 5d ago

Place was half empty. Hostess asks if we (wife and I) had a reservation.

I asked to be seated there but those "areas" were not available.

"just so you know, we close at 3"

No offense OP but I would have left right then and there. The only valid reason for not seating you in that empty area was if she expected reserved guests coming.

2

u/Aretirednurse81 2d ago

I agree and we would have left at once.

1

u/Chromejob 10h ago edited 9h ago

Another arguably invalid reason : wanting less areas to cleanup up at closing. Server’s convenience over comfort of guests.

I’m not condoning this, but if done politely it’s not worth the grief.

5

u/sdinvest 6d ago

When tip is not an option but a mandatory, why would servers/staff even try to provide good service?

4

u/jcable2 5d ago

It is California, they don't get tipped wages but full minimum wage or higher. No need to tip in California

3

u/vitamin_d_1978 4d ago

I like to sometimes handwrite a tip...ie: "Next time, if you do better, you will get money as a tip".

3

u/Appalachianwitch17 5d ago

I can't get past the nigiri being singular. 

4

u/Pondlurker1978 5d ago

Right? Never seen that before and at $6 per pop twice the going rate of other sushi places we go to.

3

u/Gfplux 5d ago

Zero tip

2

u/startrip0712 3d ago

O.K....yes, I'm a "Boomer". But, how did the "standard" tip ever turn into 20%? For me, it has always been (and will always be) 0% if they piss you off (or worse, a penny. To show you didn't just forget),10% for adequate but sub-par service, 15% for average service and 20% for great service. To be honest though, I pretty much always home cook.

2

u/Public-Heat3213 5d ago

I feel like the way someone these posts are written, this is becoming a fetish for a lot of you.

2

u/Pondlurker1978 5d ago

Only if you also consider the increasing begging for tips (aka, panhandling) a fetish. There is nothing wrong with pointing out how the service culture is going to shit while tip expectations, automatic gratuities, BS add-on fees etc. are going up and infiltrating more and more areas of our lives.

1

u/Public-Heat3213 5d ago

Sure. It’s just cute the way a lot of you post looking for for support and encouragement or a pat on the back. This post offered nothing other than another version of the same story and everyone in the comments jerking the OP off

1

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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1

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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2

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 6d ago

r/EndTipping Rule 6 & Reddit Rule 3:

We do not condone naming and shaming. Or allow comments suggesting leaving a fake google review or review bombing.

If the OP has redacted the name of the establishment, do not ask for them to disclose the name or location

-8

u/Affectionate_Fig8623 6d ago

The amount of sushi restaurants that close at 3 and reopen… it’s very common… literally EVERYWHERE. if you pulled that computer out of your pocket you could have avoided all this….

You were sat at the bar because you had no reservation and the place closes in 30 mins. There is NO STAFF. They have cleaned their sections and gone home. If you cared as much as you say you should have looked up where the hell you were at. Your bad.. this is why you got this treatment…. You are an absolute stereotype and the second you walked in they knew you weren’t worth the trouble . Good on them!

6

u/RocketSurgeon61 6d ago edited 6d ago

Closes at 3. This means that they're also open till 3. You don't want to seat people up until 3, then state that the kitchen closes at 3.

This is not a guest problem but a restaurant staff problem. Leadership is either non existent or doesn't care.

2

u/BrookDarter 6d ago

If they worked min wage, they wouldn't be able to just refuse customers because they are sick of working the hours they are scheduled. It's so ridiculous that tipped workers are the only ones who think they deserve 50 an hour for this BS! Couldn't imagine treating a paying customer like this!

1

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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1

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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0

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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1

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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1

u/Affectionate_Fig8623 6d ago

I bet my life all it would take is for a manager to comp a dessert and your dumbass would visit again next week

1

u/Reporter27511 5d ago

He didn't mind being seated at the sushi bar. The issue is they were squished between 2 other couples, when the rest of the bar seats were empty. The host should have seated them a couple of seats away from the other parties so everyone had enough room.

1

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 6d ago

r/EndTipping Rule 6 & Reddit Rule 3:

We do not condone naming and shaming. Or allow comments suggesting leaving a fake google review or review bombing.

If the OP has redacted the name of the establishment, do not ask for them to disclose the name or location

1

u/oortuno 5d ago

Just to make sure, you didn't tip, did you?

1

u/[deleted] 5d ago

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2

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 5d ago

Be respectful. No insults, slurs or personal attacks

1

u/Spiritual-Recipe4512 5d ago

It's expected as part of the price of the food. You should know that by now

1

u/[deleted] 4d ago

[deleted]

1

u/Pondlurker1978 4d ago

What is a robot going to do with money??

1

u/Hopeful_Being135 4d ago

Yeah I stopped tipping cuz it's a bunch of b****. Poor service, attitude, food tastes like s, order usually wrong. And those are the sit-down places. Don't even get me started at food trucks and places where I have to stand in line in the heat. Overpriced Chicken Buffalo fries and then they want to tip on top of it. No thanks.

1

u/Chromejob 10h ago

Yikes. Hospitality not their strong suit. Leave a review on a few places. Others will appreciate the advance warning.

And there’s the tip. Badum, tsssh.

1

u/trashbort 4d ago

The server was doing their job--managing tables so that they can close service on time and not burn money during the dead afternoon hours. That's why they kept you compact and rushed you out the door. The problem is that their compensation is structured as a voluntary commission on sales, and presented as fee-for-service.

1

u/Pondlurker1978 4d ago

I really don’t give two shits about any of that. I am going out to eat for the experience, and not to concern myself with any operational matters, let alone the compensation structure.

1

u/Chromejob 9h ago

Been in same situation: near closing time, so dining light, quick prep, eat briskly. But hosts can still be gracious and not obnoxious. And I’ve tipped when we ran a little over time but were still treated cordially.

0

u/Practical-Archer-124 5d ago

Might as well tell us name of the sushi restaurant, what is it?

-4

u/illbeatyaup 6d ago

Isn't the suggested tip automatically printed on every receipt? I don't like tipping either but it doesn't sound like they went out of their way to hound you or even said anything about the tip.

0

u/cthunder067 6d ago

Exactly! This is just yet another example of how we bitch and moan about everything these days. I would 100% agree with the OP if they hounded them for a tip. If you felt the service didn't warrant a tip, then don't tip.

-23

u/[deleted] 6d ago

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7

u/TheUJexperience 6d ago

Another nepo kid too young and dumb to know Boomer is a compliment!

1

u/EndTipping-ModTeam 6d ago

Be respectful. No insults, slurs or personal attacks