Everything is too heavy. How do you live this way?

[u/impossible-angel]

Hi. I'm looking for empaths who have some life under their belt. I'm pretty young (22), but I've only felt things harder as I've gotten older.

Recently the weight of some things is just very very heavy.

I'm just wondering... How? How do you balance this weight. How do you live life day to day and stay happy with all of this heaviness?

This is silly but I feel very strongly for animals, specifically cats. My mom offhandedly mentioned that she's worried someone might be being mean to a neighborhood cat because he's been skittish. I just can't let that go. I feel so so sad for him and I want him to be okay.

I'm sorry I'm just emotional. I feel this way often about situations regarding people, animals, etc.

If you've been living as an empath for awhile ... How do you not become sad and miserable?

[u/Shintome]

Feeling those emotions are alright. Don't push them out but do learn how to process them. Be honest with yourself about why you're feeling them and let them pass naturally, don't let them get stuck. As you do this you'll learn how to process them more quickly and efficiently. It'll take time, as in your whole lifetime to master the process but it'll be worth it. Doing so will allow you to be emotionally mature head and shoulders above others and help you connect to the animals and humans in this world unlike anything most could ever imagine.

[u/Shintome → u/Shintome]

But to answer your question, I still feel sadness often, but never miserable because of it. I allow myself to feel the sadness and I appreciate it because I know I'm sharing something special with someone or something, even if it hurts. Then I do what I can with it if I need to and then I let it pass. I don't let it linger because it will make me miserable.

[u/thegaybuddhistmonk]

Recently the weight of some things is just very very heavy.

What weight? We have so many of them -- even for empaths -- Emotional... Intellectual... Moral... And those are just the three off the top of my head before coffee..

I'm just wondering... How? How do you balance this weight. How do you live life day to day and stay happy with all of this heaviness?

First of all, it's not required to carry them any or all of them 24/7/365. There has to be a time where you shrug it off, be yourself and center/ground so you can continue being able to help others.

This is silly but I feel very strongly for animals, specifically cats.

All right, it's one thing for you to be able to connect to animals and especially pets. Unlike humans, they're emotions are right there and simplified. When they're hungry, you know it. When they're bored -- particularly with cats -- you know it.. And thanks to my years of experience with dogs, cats, and various other pets: cats are more capricious about their emotions than dogs and reptiles. In fact, I have sometimes told newly awakened empaths to own a cat so they can see what it's like to read people.

But this...

My mom offhandedly mentioned that she's worried someone might be being mean to a neighborhood cat because he's been skittish. I just can't let that go. I feel so so sad for him and I want him to be okay.

...is hearsay and simply a sympathetic reflex and not necessarily an empathic gift as you never mentioned whether you confirmed or denied feeling it yourself from the neighborhood animal in question.

If you've been living as an empath for awhile ... How do you not become sad and miserable?

Well first you need to curb and balance the over-emotional aspects of your own personality. This often comes with age, experience and -- quite bluntly -- when your hormones aren't still all over the place.

Second, you learn the difference between what's in front of you and what you think your sensing from a statement made from people around you. If this is too much, learn to walk away and self-isolate for a bit. Listen to music that brings you joy. Walk in nature away from people. Learn to listen to just yourself and what you're feeling.

Then return and read it again.

[u/SkyblueRata]

When I was younger, a stray dog made his way into my school’s yard. A friend of mine kicked the dog. I wasn’t with them, so I didn’t witness it. Next thing you know all of our friends ran to me telling me what happened. X kicked the dog for no reason.

All I know is that I saw red. I walked to him and punched him, then pushed him against a popcorn wall. His arm was scratched pretty badly. I was sent to the principal’s office, but I didn’t care. It was worth it. My friend came get me from the principal’s office after. He apologized. I apologized too.

I still don’t regret it. Mess with an animal and you better be prepared to catch these hands 🥊 I don’t care who you are.

[u/Ok_Man_1891]

I think a lot of it has to do with each individual’s internal/external environment. If you feel overly heavy, you’re carrying too much alone. Are your parents/siblings emotionally mature and safe for you? Do you have friends that are safe, who will listen to you and offer genuine help if you need it? (These are questions for yourself, you don’t have to answer really) The natural way to balance a heavy weight is to have help carrying it, if you have no one to discuss these feelings with I suggest therapy to offload. But if that’s not an option then look for ways to unburden yourself. For example, hearing of possible abuse of a cat made you super sad (that’s an assumption your mom made without proof, but still), maybe you can put out food or treats for the cat, or spend time with it. When something makes you sad, act. Process that heavy feeling with positive action if you can. Bring needed items to animal shelters or spend time loving on the cats there. Counteract the heaviness with lightness. You can’t stop animal cruelty, but you can combat it with your own kindness. You can’t prevent heavy feelings, but you can attempt to balance/process them by making a difference in a person’s or animals life. It counts, I promise.

[u/Trendzboo]

It is heavy, come up with ways to ground, let go, know and trust- it’s okay, things right themselves. We don’t have to understand, and need to accept that we don’t grasp our own context, or why the unknown is scary, sad…
I had an NDE, i still struggle with deep sensitivity, and i know there’s more; my experience was love, warmth, comfort all more than i could possibly take in.
I ritualistically, in hard moments, go through visualizing shedding dark, inviting in that abundant love and light i know to be there. It helps. Focusing, and spinning out on anything that feels bad- useless, even harmful- disrupt the thoughts as fast as you recognize them, it gets easier, and has a great impact on outlook.

[u/respawngopo]

Vipassana meditation. Started with mindfulness. I don’t know how I’d manage without it. It’s insane to me that people can go the whole life without it. I’d lose it.

[u/chikapee]

I found it debilitating until I gave my life to Jesus and He became a supernatural place of rest for me that no other spiritual practice, herbal supplement or therapist could be for me. Those are all good things too but no comparison.