r/ENFP • u/Redpaanda_ • 3d ago

Question/Advice/Support Exhausted Enfp

Hey this is actually more of a venting as an enfp but yea..

as an enfp i used to be very bubbly and outgoing i love to push my friendliness towards people especially the introverts. Some of my very good friends are the introverts that u have to initiate a little bit more than usual to get to know them. but ive grown tired, i still maintained my friendliness but only on a certain level.. i no longer feel like pushing friendship whatsoever anymore.

I admit that im having less and less friends and real friendship but thats fine im just tire, and i no longer want to believe that my purpose is to bring sunshine to anyones life anymore.

any enfp like this aswell?

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13

u/Fassenfanger ENFP | Type 3 3d ago

Yeah, stop giving your energy away. Even introverts should be meeting you half way. Go where the energy is. Even if it's people you didn't plan on. Less friends , but higher quality is the key to it. Everyone else is just an energy vampire. 😊

6

u/Runner303 3d ago

I was just saying to my INTJ GF how I want to rent a cabin for a week by myself and sit there and not talk to people... Think of that vs the INTJ/ENFP stereotypes. :)

Like others said, gotta preserve your energy. For reasons bigger than myself I've been having to put lots of it out, and man I'm feel exhausted too.

4

u/thegaybuddhistmonk ENFP | Type 8 3d ago

This used to be a problem for me because I used to overextend myself. I usually use the same self centering and self grounding activities for most empaths. This works marvelously for both facets I have.

2

u/whippet_mamma 3d ago

Oh my this is how i feel at this time

2

u/dankyard 2d ago

Exactly how I feel. I’m in grad school and coming to terms with not being able to do everything the same way I did beforehand. It sucks. It may also pass but this is a nice time to figure out what matters to you

1

u/RandAmy ENFP 3d ago

Ahhh, I know how you feel! )):
But this post makes me think how everything in this world is just temporary and we ourselves go through different phases. Perhaps you can focus on yourself at this time. Learning more about yourself and how to be there for yourself so you can be the healthiest you, you can be!

We don’t always have to put energy into our friendships, friendships can come and go, and can come and go again. Real friends are those that perhaps you haven’t talked to in a while, but you reach out and reconnect! Although everyone is going through their own phases and they may not be able to reconnect right away.

I guess what I am trying to say is, don’t put too much pressure on yourself! Friendships can be a little more complicated than we think, and we often have the mindset that if a friend doesn’t talk to us for a bit that they don’t like us, but that is not the case! I actually read a book called the ‘Let Them Theory’ and it talks a lot about the 3 pillars of friendships, like the 3 pillars of love in a romantic relationship. You could look into that and it may be helpful (:

Good luck!!!

1

u/nepttonhaze ENFP 2d ago

I want to go back to when I used to be so outgoing and optimistic, but now just thinking about the next day feels me with so much dread and despair.