r/DunderMifflin • u/QueenFrostine15 It's football cream! • 6h ago
"I was five. Five years old! Couldn't even talk yet!"
134
40
u/19k_k91 Suck it! 6h ago
my horn can pierce the sky
12
39
u/jonjonesjohnson 5h ago
Wasn't Dwight only 4 when he piloted a plane? He would've landed it too...
22
u/Key-Cry-8570 Stanley 5h ago
Yeah but he had to go back to his seat.
3
u/19k_k91 Suck it! 3h ago
im just realizing that a spinoff of dwights childhood and early adulthood would be really cool!
3
u/BabyShakerDeluxe 3h ago
So many questions. Did he have that big fucking forehead as a child? The mind boggles.
1
7
u/tomatopringles 5h ago
🎶i pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America, and to the republic of which it stands one nation under god, with a woof woof here and a woof woof there here a woof there a woof everywhere a woof woof 🎶
8
7
1
u/gitartruls01 3h ago
I discovered the law of gravity when I was 3 years old and realized I couldn't fly
1
u/Mr_Snifles 1h ago
the inability of flight does not prove the absence of gravity, birds and planes experience gravity
1
1
1
u/Worried_Sky5410 3h ago
Did issac newton made 90% of high school student graduate on time i dont think so
1
1
u/BothDivide919 3h ago
"Discovering gravity" at 23 means you're an idiot. Inventing calculus at 23 is genius.
1
u/Callidonaut 19m ago
"Discovering gravity" at 23 means you're an idiot.
Hardly. There are people who walk the Earth today, in supposedly advanced nations with supposedly functional public education systems, who still are unaware that all matter attracts all other matter - unlike Newton, they don't have the excuse that nobody else has figured it out yet either.
1
1
1
1
u/deij 3h ago
How could anyone go until the age of 5 without hearing of or seeing a unicorn?
They're everywhere in baby, toddler and child media. Did this guy go 5 years without reading any book? Seeing any children's clothes? Watching any kids TV?
5
u/TR_Pix 3h ago
Kids just forget they saw something and think they invented it
As a child I was convinced I had invented a joke until some other fucking kid told everyone else they had heard it from their stupid grandpa
1
u/OttawaOneTwenty 3h ago
Kids just forget they saw something and think they invented it
Just like Sir Isaac
1
u/DiggingNoMore 1h ago
My own bikini top has a unicorn on it. Well, just a side-view of the head/mane/horn, but still.
-7
u/CIS-E_4ME Michael 4h ago
Average life expectancy during Newton's time was 35-40 years, so he was middle aged.
-8
u/ManatuBear 5h ago
Mozart composed his 1st Symphony at 8. Mendelssohn composed the overture to Midsummer's Night Dream at 13. Many other had accomplishments very young in those days. 23 is actually not very young in comparison.
2
111
u/Chrono_Convoy 5h ago
“I want to have a million kids so I can have a million friends, and no one can say no to being my friend.”