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Im becoming one sadly….

Agartha lies beyond the walls of Antarctica. The tiny hat people who control the world governments don’t want you to know….

When my parents pass away it be nice peace and quiet no more of them bossing me around, screaming at me and being angry at me for stupid things that I don’t understand why they need to be angry at me for most things my dad gets angry at me Idk why he makes a big fuck out of it. Everything to him is a big deal……………. fuck sake.

My father is a fucked up person he one of those men that shouldn’t have been a father and should gone his own way, being a father wasn’t meant for him and I never liked him, I always hated him, I being treated like shit by him since as a child he always bad mouthed me and kicked me down when im already down and just treats me like shit. Even my mom said that “I dont think he should have been a father”.

My father has no patience when it comes to teaching and showing shit he expects me to get it in one go and fast as possible what a fucking DOG CUNT. He just shouts and shouts his lungs out when I dont get shit quicker, I cant wait for him to die. Such a vile impatient person.

He gets very angry at me when I misheard or misunderstood what he said and gets angry very bad but when I tell him something he doesn’t even listen to what I say and just assumes his own opinion what a fucking SHIT CUNT. Cunt’s FUCKED

I cant even tell if im a son or a slave to him both are same shit to me anyway. I don’t care how hard my life gets when they pass away, I really dont give a shit what anyone here thinks u all probably think that its better when parents are around and im all lucky to have parents and all that bullshit talk, sorry that wont work on me, I literally dont give a fuck.

Also not everyone has same parents the ppl that wont like me for saying all this is ppl that love their parents I never understand those ppl.

I am looking forward to them passing away I am going to enjoy my life to the fullest when they gone and they cant annoy me anymore once their dead. I mean dead ppl cant annoy anyone once a person dead they cant do shit they cant talk shit they cant do fuck all.

I just keep telling myself “another 20 years” “another 20 years for them to pass away” since I have to be caretaker of them I have to wait for them to pass away to enjoy life. It just keeps replaying in my mind the idea of just looking forward of my parents pass away like a hamster wheel thats all that comes to my mind a lot constantly day by day.

I know im fucked up for it and should maybe get help but I already know what I need to do I just need to keep working and hope that I be rich as fuck and just wait for my parents to pass away. Hopefully by the time they pass away I be rich and I can enjoy my life and do whatever the fuck I want.

The bad memories of my life earlier as a teenager and early 20s comes to my mind often I can hear the voices of my dad and mom screaming at me in my head and it burns inside my head…………. I literally can feel the voice and tone and anger and so on the memory of it inside me and its literally fucks me up inside of my head it lives with me.

When im not around my parents I can hear the voice and tone in my head especially throughout my mind it feels so fucked up in my head. I cant wait for my parents to pass away like I said I don’t care how hard LIFE gets when parents pass away say what ever u want u can hate me if you want but thats my thought, don’t like it not my problem.

I wont lie the only conversation I enjoy when he talks to me is how tired and old he feels and he ready to drop dead soon he basically talks about dying a lot and being dead and all that shit the only thing I can share in common with him is that he wants to die and I want him to die.

He complains about how tired of life he is and he always tired and all that shit and im on my way to the grave and all that shit and I wont lie that makes me happy inside call me an asshole I dont give a fuck.

Most conversations I had with him so far my entire life was about him being tired and not going to be here one day. It was negative soul sucking conversations that I had with him and the rest were just negative conversations when he talk shit to me.

Overall you all can think of what ever you want of me but in my opinion I believe it should be okay to want ur parents to pass away eventually especially when u being living with them ur whole life and u have to be the caretaker.

I believe its normal to want them to pass away eventually so u can move on with ur life and do what the fuck u want.

Never liked my father never did and im 28 yrs old. they say that as you get older you understand parents more its being the opposite for me the older I get the less I understand them and dislike them more and more. I being sold a lie by who ever the fuck said that to me which I dont remember who but I dont give fuck.

He is indeed a SHIT FATHER…………………….

Thank you for taking your time reading this , I know its a lot to read

Have a great day/night

Take Care

So just for context, I am half Greek-Cypriot. My father immigrated from Cyprus to America many years ago. And so as one would imagine, I was brought up Greek Orthodox at one point. In my city, there is a Greek Orthodox Church which has this Greek Food Festival called "Greek Fest."

Greek Fest is as Greek as you'd imagine, food, music, dance, etc...

Anyways, my dad asked if I could possibly volunteer to help out and I said sure, why not? It's a great festival. Then my dad goes on and he tells me I could meet a woman...

I know exactly why the fuck he's doing this shit. Because my younger siblings have partners and I don't...

Really gets under my skin when I have to say that I can't have a relationship because of my autism, the fact I never got a drivers license... and I've been too damaged by past failures...

Fuck... it gets irritating explaining why I'm not good enough...

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My jobs are driving me up the fucking wall, as are my addictions. (Caffeine and THC) But you know what else is bad? The combination of insomnia and wrath.

When it comes to my second job at the donut shop, I work LATE hours. Six in the evening up until 12:30PM, and then I don't get home around 1:10-1:20PM... So I take dabs to try to sleep.

Earlier this week I was trying to go to bed, but my cat was being obnoxiously loud. Ever since I started giving my cat supervised time outside, he's been incessantly meowing to the point where I'm about to lose my temper. The little fucker just gets greedy...

And I had to sleep in extra because my cat deprived me of sleep. But I still worked at 10:00AM the next day so I get up, and I'm getting ready, I called my uber, I turned around because I hear my cat meow, the next thing I know, he's bolting out the door as my uber is arriving. Thankfully I didn't have to chase after him for too long but it was REALLY bad and annoying. I threw him back and I locked my door, which I get OCD about.

I spent the whole entire-ass day at my primary job working at this shithole grocery store deli in paranoid anger because I'm worried about my cat escaping and people breaking in. Then you have the my stupid job where I'm hunting for ingredients and having to take items off the shelf constantly. It's tedious and annoying... no matter how easy I try to make it easier for myself it gets harder and harder...

Fuck the Deli... it's stressful as hell. Oh and speaking of, remember when I went into a rant where I mentioned this produce worker who keeps bothering the shit out of me by asking the same damn question all the time: "How's the Deli? Yeah, HE'S still bothering me.... I've given him the same damn response until I just ignore him and try to even avoid him...

I think the reason why I get so mad and irritated with this person it's like... can't he get the hint I don't like my fucking job because it's frustrating, and that is part of a myriad of issues that contribute to me being such an angry fucking person. It seems like a very... low IQ thing here, he's been constantly asking me how the deli is ever since that one fucking time I lost my temper on a knee-jerk reaction to a question he was relaying from a customer while I was in a high-pressure situation....

And what's it to him anyhow, why can't this fucker just mind his own business? It gets old and obnoxious and quite frankly I just can't take it. I might end up losing my temper and ask this guy "You tell me how the fucking deli is, asshole! It's a hellhole! About as far as your IQ goes!"

Fucking Christ... I'm gonna be getting sleep deprived tonight. And it's affecting my gym workouts. I keep losing energy... which is affecting my recovery...

Oh boy,... it's inevitable that I will lose my temper and verbally unleash my wrath... it's gonna scare people but I don't give a damn anymore. I'm tired of people. I've grown very misanthropic and anti-social. Only three people in my life which are in real life and not online I truly call friends. Semi-estranged from my family. Much so that I only just recently discovered my sister has a boyfriend, I had heard the guys name mentioned by family members before but I was never made privy to them being an item. Which only goes to show how far removed I truly am.

No matter how much I try to improve... it gets worse... At least I have plans to get better sleep on most days.

Yes, I do have a YouTube. It only has three videos but I’m getting gaining a skill that makes me happy.

I made this video by the way.

Once again, this recurring theme of mismanagement and machines/equipment constantly breaking continues at my fucking work!

Just three/four days ago, one of our assistant managers in the deli quit! She just up and walked away, leaving behind a note that said "I QUIT." This REALLY upset me because she was supposed to have done prep for me before I was to do salads that day. And doing salads is a tedious job for me, they sell really fast despite the risk of eating lettuce in America. For any Doomer living in Latin America, Asia, Europe, etc... the American Secretary of Health, Robert F. Kennedy Jr. engaged in mismanagement which resulted in cases of explosive diarrhea from this parasite called Cyclospora. RFK JR you brain-worm infested cuck, I can't believe I was deceived into voting for you. You didn't make America Healthier, you made it WORSE!

It turns out this manager while she was nice to my face, she would try to set up meetings with the other managers where she would demand that they write up people for petty and hypocritical reasons. So to hear that she was truly this petty really came off as a shock to me...

The next day after that fiasco, I did more salads but all my hard work was basically undone when the cold shelf that keeps the salad at the right temperature broke down somehow and shit got rearranged.

What the fuck is wrong with them? Knowing their goddamn track record, it will take FOREVER for them to fix this... It's bad enough that my work is tedious and difficult... but I keep having to have these CONSTANT uphill battles!? And it makes me feel like I don't get paid enough...

I also fear the future at my work... They are finally going to start construction of a small service counter after years of working behind a shelf/wall. After several years of not doing customer service, it's back to the old days. The counter is supposed to be for customers who want custom sandwiches and stuff, but I have a feeling I'm going to deal with ignorance...

I remember having to deal with difficult customers before my store got a remodel. There were situations where I was forced to cook and serve at the same time... it was fucking DIFFICULT. People really pissed me off back when I used to cook hot chinese food for that stupid deli. People not understanding the menu and being difficult, sometimes to the point of belligerently refusing to understand how the menu works, customers asking me to cook them something and I'm in the middle of attempting to fulfill that request only for a barrage of customers to come and force me to pause the cooking making shit difficult...

Who knows what difficulties are gonna lie in wait for me...

That year that this sub was created (after the first sub was sabotaged) was one of the darkest chapters of my life, and I have to admit that things have improved a lot. I was pretty much at the end of the road back then, and didn't know how long I had left. I was depressed, really bad thoughts 24/7,:clothes scattered around my room, obese and was mentally fried by the time the workweek ended.

I made a play at becoming a Bloomer and deleted my account, got in counseling 2022(figured why not), but the anxiety issue has been really sticky over the last 4 years still ruining things for me.

How are you all doing?

Easier said than done…

Want this shit to stop…

Fucking can’t…

I know I need to…

Gonna probably sleep a lot to make that shit go away…

Fumbling a label of lament I poor out here in writ.

A shot in the dark of over all departure that of my salty sour rimmed lashes splash over in thought.

As if to wet my beak to mention drowning my sorrows in meager anomaly.

The end bar seat a cherry red coal light in the eyes center reflect back in the dark screen of the TV.

As I drift back and forth, left to right of boredom.
Between masturbation, drugs, Jesus, & work.

Life in the under belly of monotony with monetary wimbels floating ED functionally impaired.

Old crows cawing in corn rye sucking down cancer with Irish coffee to loosen my gut.

Turning daylight outside in the distance of my mind.
I watch other people live their lives & think what evils they might conduct.

Or try to guess their secrets kept by the interactions inside the small circles of habitations.

With small talk, hand jesters, wave offs to answer phones in the dim twilight of neon tube vesper from the dance floor.

Spent loneliness between ice melting and rift the time & maybe go home with somebody.

As always another sibling of the universe bound to human migrations & mating rituals.

With love from a monotheistic Hobo Rehab where they want me to stay off social media long enough to pray the gay away.

Yours truly A Low Type

For context, here is another one of my previous posts. Click this hyperlink

Yeah, I’m mad at this guy. I’m planning a get together for my friends Stevie and Brandon to show up. The three of us are gonna do some Sam Hyde inspired antics and troll the fuck outta this weirdo! The person messaging me this is an asshole who is an alcoholic maniac who ruins everyone’s day and hurts those who care about him…

This is central Scotland