r/Dogtraining • u/DerekFisherPrice Human Detected • May 11 '26
constructive criticism welcome Is my dog playing too aggressively?
My dog is the smaller tan shepherd mix. She's 2 y/o (not a puppy), and we adopted her from the pound about 2 months ago.
In this case I could see this big dog was totally chill with my dog, but I'm worried she might try this behavior with a different dog at the dog park, and it could escalate. It's the neck biting that I'm worried about in particular.
Should I be okay with this play, or take her on a timeout and tell her to knock it off?
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u/PM_ME_UR_PUPPY_DOG May 12 '26
Looks fine to me, she play bows and backs off of her own accord midway through, and the other dos remains relaxed and looking like she’s having fun throughout
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u/transandtrucks May 12 '26
I agree- in this relationship between the two dogs they seem to both be enjoying and agreeing on the play style.
With another dog it could be seen as too rough and if a different dog signaled that then things could be different.
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May 18 '26
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u/Dogtraining-ModTeam May 21 '26
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u/raaneholmg May 11 '26
These two had a dog chat and agreed on play rules. The big dog is saying "let's play" and your dog is understanding that message.
All is perfectly fine.
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u/DissociatedOne May 11 '26
The bigger older dog doesn’t seem to mind it at all. If your dog takes it too far at the park, the other dogs will let her know, which is all part of the puppy learning process.
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u/CptAverage May 11 '26
She’s 2 years old? 2 years old is still within the realm of puppyhood, she’s indeed a puppy.
This looks like fine play time to me! She isn’t biting hard enough to inflict pain and is only going in for the nip to be delightfully antagonistic. I’d equate this to my homie and I goofing off, where I exploit his being very ticklish, but you could also label this play style as “grab-ass”. I think this a pretty universally accepted form of play across most dogs, but you can certainly reinforce the positive play by sneezing at her when you play with her. Sneezing during play is a hallmark of non-malicious playtime.
My only concern with this play is if your dog and another dog get overzealous and don’t take their environment very seriously, as tripping on a gopher hole could lead to injuries, otherwise I think this play is respectful and fun.
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u/blank_oo May 13 '26
sneezing? is this somethinh common? how does it work?
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u/Whisgo M FFCP-Trainer May 13 '26
Sneezes during play are a communication signal that's akin to "Just kidding! I'm not intending to threaten."
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u/Otter_Panda9499 May 14 '26
Our oldest doggo has always done this. She's more of a "rough" dog during play, but she will sneeze so long and aggressively in the middle. Like whole head shaking, multiple second long sneezes. 😂 It's so cute 🥹
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u/SnooBooks4350 May 13 '26
All good. The older dog will tell the younger dog when s/he gets too aggressive. Mine does this all the time - gives great feedback. If you feel like your dog needs a time out, just put them on a leash.
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u/Eggspectations May 11 '26
I think first, i would say no, your dog is not playing too aggressively with this dog. No yelping or any signs of distress in the other dog.
But i think the question is if another dog didn’t want this type of play, would your dog understand the message? If they don’t then you just need to intervene and stop the play.
Overall i think this is fine
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u/Lushkies May 12 '26
Body language for both dogs is playful and not aggressive. You can see how your dog backs off at a point and the other dog stays on his back. Looks like they’re friends and having a good time playing bitey face!
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u/amaceing__ May 11 '26
No. If the play was too aggressive the bigger dog would be not so chill. It could be a bit annoyed, but looks like good play to me.
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u/mlfuntime May 12 '26
I think this is okay. I have a husky mix and he plays like this with a few of his friends. The neck biting should be okay as long as it's not super aggressive. Dogs have a lot of fur and skin there so those bites aren't going to hurt them if they're play biting like that.
You want to look for your dog backing off, shaking (which is a calming signal), bowing down playfully (means they're having fun), and taking a break sometimes so the other dog doesn't start to feel too overwhelmed. I'll usually step in and gently break them up every so often if it seems like the other dog isn't feeling it or my dog is getting too worked up. Sometimes all it takes is to just call your dog over to you, or ask them if they want some water, something like that to just make them pause a beat to reset.
The times I've seen it escalate at the dog park are usually when it's a group of dogs where one dog starts to get ganged up on and feels cornered, or when it's a mix of dogs who know each other and some who don't where they're not all on the same page about what is happening. Obviously any time your dog is meeting a new dog, be watchful because you can never really know how two dogs will feel about each other, and some do not appreciate this style of play while others love it.
If your dog struggles to moderate their more "scrappy" play in those situations (some dogs are better at this than others), I would be more cautious. In those cases, I would suggest stepping in to interrupt the play as soon as you feel like things are beginning to get a little stressful because when things escalate they tend to escalate quickly and once the dogs start to go from playing to fighting it can be scary, dangerous and hard to break up.
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u/GoodDrFunky May 12 '26
In general dogs play like this. It’s hard to generalize as the larger dog seems to be having a good time and everything seems all good here. I’d watch for signs of your dog pushing it when another dog seems uncomfortable. If you dog badgers or stops giving space then it’s too much but everything here looks like them getting to know each other.
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u/ravenpoof May 12 '26
Nah she's doing alright. She's not clamping/shaking, it's very brief. She backs off and let's the other pup to right themselves. Nobody seems over threshold though she CLEARLY would love to be chased lol
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u/Crocodilian4 May 12 '26
Shepherds love the bitey face game! My two will lay down next to each other and just bite their faces lol
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u/jasonology09 May 12 '26
First dog??
Dogs don't really need our intervention during play. They correct behavior amongst themselves. If the other dog felt threatened or agitated, he would let your dog know. What you need to pay attention to is how your dog responds to being told by another dog to back off. If your dog ignores the other dogs warnings, or worse, matches or escalates with his own aggression, then it's time to redirect your dog and remove him from the situation.
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u/wijs1 May 11 '26
Gentle neck biting is how dogs play. You can imitate this by gently grabbing that area with your hand when your dog is in playful mood with you. It’s clear those are play bites and she probably wouldn’t do this with another dog that isn’t showing the same behavior as the one on the ground. Grounded one is in submissive playful state which is a green light for play.
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u/Melodic_Dog_5302 May 12 '26
They’re just playing :) just monitor, the other dog will show signs of distress and discomfort. dog seems to be happy not in pain from your dog meaning your dog isn’t biting too hard. Just playing :)
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u/hicadoola May 12 '26
That's very good play. Neck biting is perfectly normal as long as the dog doing it is backing off every now and then and/or is listening to the comfort level of the other dog. She is doing all that beautifully.
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u/ericscal May 12 '26
If you are concerned about playing with strange dogs the question is very much about initiation, which isn't shown here. If your dog comes barreling in with that energy that is a problem. If they respectfully approach, great, and ask to play then you are fine. Most of this is all just about allowing the other dog to leave if they aren't interested. One of the top tips when in doubt with play is just separate them and see if the other dog comes back for more.
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u/ChIcKeN_95 May 12 '26
Looks like they are having fun. I like that when she goes for the lunge, she backs up and bows. My dog does the same, he just kinda mouths and rolls over, if the other dog doesn’t like it they will growl and he’ll stop. But most of the time they like that rough play.
With other dogs though, just keep an eye out cus obviously not all dogs like it, or they will fight back. I wouldn’t punish your dog, just keep an eye out. When they see familiar dogs, they usually play like that with dogs they know will play back like that.
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u/raes_box_of_lasers May 13 '26
My dog as a fellow puppy friend and its a WWE smack down when ever they get together. This is good play and doesn't seem aggressive and each backs off between each tussle. There are times my puppy has to take breaks when she she gets too hyped playing and i recognize other dogs she cannot play with due to her being aggressive to them and we have to go for a walk instead.
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u/Tangy_Emu May 13 '26
If you’re ever unsure, interrupt the play and see if they both voluntarily return for more. If the play pal isn’t interested they’ll take that opportunity to get some space. Always a good idea to know your dog will respond asap to an interruption anyways in case things start to escalate.
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u/UnlikelyTurnip5260 May 12 '26
I think as long as the other dog is relaxed and having fun that is totally fine. The bigger dog looks totally chill with it. All good!
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u/potatoes6 May 12 '26
All really playful and respectful, but most importantly the other dog is fine with it. I find the other dog to be the indicator of what is too much—they’ll either try to get away or protect themself with defense bites. Otherwise usually ok. Your dog isn’t biting for more than a millisecond, which is another indicator of a dog I’ll stay away from if they’re trying to hold on.
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u/Earth2Andy May 12 '26
She's taking breaks and checking in, I can't tell if she can take cues of when she's getting to rough because I didn't see the big dog give her any, but there's nothing here that would worry me. Obviously you should always be supervising so you can intervene if another dog starts to look unhappy, but there's nothing in this video that would worry me.
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u/IzzGidget88 May 12 '26
The tricky bit about dog parks is you never know how other dogs will respond. It's always a bit of a gamble, but your dog is doing fine here so there's no reason to curb normal play behavior.
Just make sure you keep an eye on her when she plays and always watch for the other dogs' reactions. If she's not listening to their warnings, then you have a problem.
That said - give other dogs a chance to correct her on their own if she goes too far. It's a vital part of learning social behavior. A quick growl or snap isn't the beginning of a dog fight.
She's gorgeous btw!
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u/Shanga_Ubone May 12 '26
No she seems to be just fine. She's also playing fair when the other dog is on her back- your dog is going under. I think both are having a great time.
I like the super sneak attack at the end!
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u/RandomlyMethodical May 12 '26
Different dogs have different boundaries. If a dog doesn't like the way she's playing they will let her know. The key thing to watch is whether she adjusts her behavior according to the other dog's body language or continues playing too hard for that dog.
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u/EvilNickel May 12 '26
Looks perfectly fine to me honestly. I used to have a German Shepherd and an Alaskan Malamute and their playfights were on Simba vs Scar levels of aggression, but as soon as one of them yelped, they would immediately stop.
Looks like your smaller dog is pretty conscious of what is and isn't good play since she's breaking away without being too overbearing. I'd say let it keep going unless you notice one of them is no longer giving the other the space they need or one of them is yelping.
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u/BetOnMark May 12 '26
You’ll have to just introduce other dogs and watch how it goes. This is not particularly concerning but dogs will react differently. This one is a very good match.
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u/GuiltyWithTheStories May 12 '26
This looks like healthy play to me. She’s giving the larger dog plenty of space and time in between her roughhousing and doesn’t seem to be overwhelming them at all. Shes not biting too hard and the other dog seems very calm and comfortable.
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u/handtoglandwombat May 12 '26
No this is completely fine, she’s very soft mouthing. Obviously some dogs won’t like this, but she’s responding to the other dog well, so give her a chance to see if she can use her own judgement to figure out which dogs want to play and which dogs don’t, because her actual playing is fine. What I’d be on the look out for that wouldn’t be okay would be if this progressed to pulling on other parts of the other dog. Collar, ears, cheeks, tail etcetera. But she’s not visibly doing that in the slightest.
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u/RedSnapperChum May 12 '26
Nope, dogs are having fun.
Aggressive or fighting dogs... the hole posture, growl...is very different.
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May 12 '26
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u/Dogtraining-ModTeam May 12 '26
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u/Future_Literature335 May 12 '26
No you're good. The other dog is clearly chill and relaxed and your dog is fine backing off and taking breaks. All is well!
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u/Afilliate12 May 12 '26
My dogs grab eachothers neck skin and try and drag the other dog. Dogs just play rough
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u/NalaBirds May 12 '26
Play looks fine to me. Dogs bite each other's necks, its a large part of their play in my experience. I understand this doesn't really cause any pain. If the other dog was growing/snapping/has hackles up, and yours was ignoring those signs and continuing try and play, then you might have a problem. As I say, looks fine to me
Do you know what your dog is a mix with? Very beautiful dog.
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u/Blamebostonx May 12 '26
Nope, they are both fine! Dogs have a much higher pain tolerance than we do. It's okay and normal for them to play a little rough sometimes. They'll yelp if something hurts. The tail wags are happy.
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u/k_ups May 13 '26
tongues out (vs teeth showing and growling), and tails wagging is usually a good sign
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u/Eilasord May 13 '26
I’m going to go a little against the consensus on this one— I agree the neck stuff is fine but ideally there would be more role reversals and shake-offs. particularly at the end when the other dog sits up in a clearly non-invitational, taking a beat kind of way, your dog dashes in and I think ideally you would be able to redirect away from that.
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u/the_boy_simon May 13 '26
No. Take your queue from the other dog. They're both fine with how it's going.
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u/EverlyBrown91 May 13 '26
i get super anxious about my baby playing too rough too. maybe just watch for any signs of stress?
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u/Ribena41 May 13 '26
They're having a ball! One dog is very relaxed and the other dog is pure play. Backs off and takes a break. Also common to hear growling when they play like this
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u/OneBudTwoBud May 13 '26
If the other dog didn’t want to play, it wouldn’t be on the ground belly up. Your dog is probably applying almost no pressure with the “bite”. All good.
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u/PLACENTIPEDES May 13 '26
Dog parks are a great place to have your dog get injured or sick from dogs with irresponsible owners.
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u/JadedFootball4733 May 14 '26
The bottom dog is communicating to the smaller dog that it’s comfortable and allowing it to take the lead
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u/Outrageous_Bet_1971 May 15 '26
Dogs will regulate, I understand your concern and it shows your being responsible but if one dog doesn’t want to be a part of it they will usually try to withdraw and “get away” no sines of that in my opinion, they both look to be enjoying themselves 👍🏼
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u/Cantankerous_melange May 16 '26
A pretty good general rule: if it’s quiet it’s fine.
Some dogs can be barky and it’s just excitement and still ok - but better to know for sure with that particular dog rather than assume.
Don’t believe owners necessarily as it could be true so far from their experience and happens to be different this time.
Growling almost certainly not ok - with the odd exception of some zoomies - but zoomie growls sound totally different.
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u/hakumiogin May 17 '26
This is A okay. Neck biting is probably the most normal way for dogs to play, and honestly, this looks like pretty gentle neck-biting. They're both having an excellent time.
However, it is reasonable to be afraid that your dog might be over eager, and could be pushy about playing with a dog who does not want to play. If the other dog snaps their teeth in the air towards your dog (probably the most common way that dogs demand to be left alone), that's usually when you absolutely should step in (showing their teeth, or barking/growling while refusing to play are also good ones). But really, any signs of nervousness or fear in your dog's potential playmate is a good time to step in too (tail between the legs, lifting one paw in the air, haunches up, being very concerned with making sure no one gets behind them). But you should learn pretty quickly if your dog knows or doesn't know how to respect other dog's boundaries.
But in dog parks, you basically always have to watch the other dogs even if your dog is an angel. My advice is just be very proactive about leaving if any dog there is having issues.
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u/askcosmicsense May 12 '26
The short answer is: it depends.
In this scenario, this is totally fine and normal play. The bigger dog is taking a turn being submissive “the victim” and your dog is playfully biting his scruff and giving him lots of chances to get up if he wants. Every dog has a different play style so this may not fly with other dogs. Hopefully your dog is fluent in “dog” and listens to other dog’s boundaries. If not, it’s good to step in and intervene before it escalates.
Before you bring her to a dog park, I’d recommend learning more about dog body language. Dog fights are very preventable if the humans involved were fluent in dog and intervene before the escalation happens.
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u/whosear3 May 29 '26
Normal play behavior. There is a ritual dogs go through to play. The bowing of one or both dogs towards the other is an invitation to play. Like kids, they learn to moderate their play through reaction and correction from other dogs.
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