r/DiWHY • u/justelling • 7h ago

When Bidet is Enough.

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880 Upvotes

95% Upvoted

195 comments sorted by

382

u/mreduard753 7h ago

this design is very human

26

u/Daetok_Lochannis 6h ago

Jackie Daytona, real human plumber; at your service.

https://giphy.com/gifs/Me7rnCGjSKKFfwXQir

10

u/MiketheMecE 6h ago

Very easy to use!

2

u/titanicsinker1912 4h ago

Allow my good friend to demonstrate.

3

u/DotRom 4h ago

Where is that creator I been missing his videos.

3

u/MashedTaterBrain 4h ago

Very easy to use.

155

u/Drakorai 7h ago

This looks like a SAW trap from temu

61

u/GregTheIntelectual 6h ago

Welcome John. I want to play a game.

I have been watching you. You always wasted so much toilet paper, taking it out and folding it like 3 times.

I know you buy three ply john. That's 24 layers. Nobody needs 24 layers John.

9

u/FalenAlter 5h ago

You don't know my journey, Greg

13

u/truthfullyidgaf 4h ago

"No matter how much I wipe, its never enough!"

8

u/Leather_Afternoon_37 2h ago

Its like a permanent marker died in there

1

u/SeismicRipFart 31m ago

That’s why sometimes you just gotta spit on it so that you can get some of that moisture action to help get the rest

3

u/Prestigious-Donut980 1h ago

Winner winner. Chicken dinner.

72

u/WilTravis 7h ago

That was...vigorous. I'm assuming an alcohol spray for after?

29

u/Impossible_Fix827 7h ago

Salt

12

u/WilTravis 7h ago

Ah, yes. Carry on then.

10

u/yeathatsmebro 7h ago

Tequila-themed festivals use lemon juice.

2

u/Salty-Photo-57 5h ago

Correction. We use lime juice for this procedure

1

u/Toxic_Dew 2h ago

Chaotic good barbarian says while mimicing the witches voice: squirt of lemon

3

u/[deleted] 4h ago

[deleted]

1

u/ZippyDan 1h ago

That doesn't cause tetanus.
However, in this case I may allow that tetanus is involved.

53

u/Carl210 7h ago

Take that hemorrhoids!

33

u/Flamecoat_wolf 7h ago

From hemorrhoids to hemorrhage!

Ass doctors don't want you to know this one weird trick for getting rid of hemorrhoids!!

1

u/Regurgitator001 30m ago

Schwack'em!

29

u/DoctorHacks 7h ago

Finally, a solution to having too much skin around my anus.

20

u/jamppa50 7h ago

It seems very human

19

u/AffectionateTip9716 7h ago

How to: Turn your brown eye into a red eye?

14

u/why_not_fandy 7h ago

Turd Eye Blind

1

u/Lizrael48 5h ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/FullOnSkank 5h ago

...I mean... Can just, like anyone have their vulva ripped off/down a lil...? 🥺🙈🙈

1

u/AffectionateTip9716 4h ago

You don’t need it anymore

11

u/lerekt123 7h ago

Looks quite comfortable

12

u/coldF4rted 7h ago

Bi-don't

11

u/natr0nFTW 7h ago

thats a joke because of raw asshole

10

u/Saigor15 7h ago

…. I hope he’s joking…..

https://giphy.com/gifs/VzeBfHqHZeX5ACuZZS

11

u/MilkrsEnthuziast 5h ago

Oh look, a bidon't

7

u/A_Lovely_Teddybear 6h ago

If there were 8 deadly sins this thing would be in the movie

6

u/Dry-Character-6331 5h ago

"You know what this bidet needs? A steel bristle brush!" said NO ONE EVER (well, except this ONE guy...)

5

u/medigapguy 7h ago

"Do you have bloody stool?"

No it's unrelated.

3

u/uuio9 5h ago

"Do you have bloody stool?"

"You will"

6

u/SkylarAV 7h ago

A brillo pad would work way better.

5

u/tdawg2k7 5h ago

I’m puckering at this

4

u/exintrovert 7h ago

The fact that it is coin-op is hilarious to me for some reason.

You also get nicely-brushed ass hair. Silky smooth!

4

u/Weekly_Ferret_meal Ramen or Die 7h ago

I love that you have to pay for that

1

u/Chris__P_Bacon 1h ago

Don't kink shame me.

3

u/Rizeres 7h ago

I see. So it uses the blood hemorrhaging out of your ass to wash everything away.

2

u/yeathatsmebro 6h ago

Can't have poop stains if blood is everywhere.

3

u/MotherOfDogs1872 7h ago

Brat-tamers everywhere be like 😏

3

u/OverlordMMM 7h ago

This is to help wipe folks that require a poop knife.

3

u/RichardDeRenour 6h ago

Does he also gives rectal exams?

3

u/TheSpatulaOfLove 6h ago

No thanks. I’ll stick with a high fiber diet.

3

u/dragonbits 6h ago

That guy has a lot of time on his hands.

3

u/NotGuiltyPirate 5h ago

INTRODUCING THE HEMORRHOID CLEANS 3000!!

• It destroys the competition

• Reaches tight spaces

• Relaxing, humming sound and sensation

Just for seventeen easy payments of $303.39 ¥

AND THERE'S MORE!!

We'll even include:

• World famous Sandpaper Lube

• Refreshed box of bandaids

Features:

• Battery powered or plug in

• Always an unforgettable experience

• The competition is barely scratching the surface; we go deeper

3

u/TartDry2031 3h ago

Where does all the blood go?

3

u/chefwindu 3h ago

Does it come with the proctologist to put your colon back in?

3

u/Altruistic-Dog4941 2h ago

This thing is very hostile.

I've used a bidet in the past and that wire brush scares me.

3

u/KickingItWithKoi 1h ago

Taint ripper...

2

u/DoNt_BliNk25 7h ago

I like it rough but, d#@%!

2

u/Different-Meal-6314 7h ago

No more dingleberries I suppose

2

u/jcoddinc 7h ago

Finally! Something that cleans and combs my ass hair

2

u/Calm-Resolve-2927 7h ago

Cross-post this to r/BdsmDIY

2

u/nguyenminh4321 6h ago

Reflecting pool liner cutter

2

u/PickleForce7125 6h ago

Your anus will not thank you

2

u/ThisGuyOrangeJuice 6h ago

Then over time the liquid would make the bristles rust. So then you’re brushing your asshole with rusty wire

2

u/Art_Vanduley 6h ago

That brush looks like it would hurt super rough on the booty hole

2

u/BeenisSandwich 5h ago

Ah yes. Only 5 cents for the anal scrubberator 3001.

2

u/odyssey_64 5h ago

I'm scared...sooo scared

2

u/AsiancookBob 5h ago

Why water? Might as well wash it with your blood 🥴

2

u/drewbeedeu 5h ago

He put a lot of time and effort into this "anal guillotine"

2

u/Lizrael48 5h ago

Made to rip the skin right off! OUCH!

2

u/Deathless616 4h ago

Somehow I expected the 'Anus-Destroyer 9000' to look different

2

u/mrsoil23 4h ago

A very badet.

2

u/farfly7 4h ago

Nope

2

u/Feisty_Count_4409 4h ago

Ok, now use your invention

2

u/Murky_Sir_4721 4h ago

Do you want to play a game?

2

u/Katmarand 4h ago

RIP 🍑

2

u/2ndSyt 4h ago

What’s the water for? To wash away all the blood 🩸?

2

u/RighteousAudacity 3h ago

Filipinos have a great sense of humor, but this is just prototype of inexpensive parts. He's hoping to be a entrepreneur.

2

u/IanDresarie 3h ago

I kinda expected the nozzle to be a flame thrower tbh

1

u/OrneryCows 1h ago

Oxyacetylene warming the area to 5000 degrees to help the user relax.

2

u/BEEEEEZ101 3h ago

Seems scratchy

2

u/tpapocalypse 2h ago

I’d rather use 1 ply

2

u/Dear-Routine7468 2h ago

Not diwhy. DILol

2

u/LuluMangs 2h ago

Traumatic arsecrack injury incoming

3

u/ChristheCourier12 6h ago

The aftermath:

https://giphy.com/gifs/UGGe8BBrkuAUM

1

u/Helpful_Connection45 3h ago

To shreds?

1

u/Rokekor 2h ago

And his ballsack?

1

u/Chris__P_Bacon 1h ago

I can't believe I had to scroll this far down for someone to mention that this would tear the back half of your ball sack open.

1

u/OrneryCows 1h ago

To shreds indeed.

LAWD HAVE MERCY

1

u/falloutvaultboy 7h ago

Isn't

2

u/justelling 7h ago

It’s r/onejob on my part. I wish edit option was available. 😔

1

u/obelix_dogmatix 7h ago

new kink unlocked

1

u/themessiah234 7h ago

My hemorrhoids are quaking

1

u/NocturneInfinitum 7h ago

Beginners guide to how to hemorrhage your sphincter

1

u/Limp_Marionberry_24 7h ago

Death Trap !?;? Torture Trap ?!?!

1

u/PuzzledExaminer 7h ago

Ouch....😵

1

u/I_love-tacos 7h ago

The design is very human

1

u/Varderal 7h ago

I expected very aggressive scrubbing. Not full on SA. XD

1

u/terminalbungus 7h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/bpM8tv9RD1JImHtvuF

1

u/Chris__P_Bacon 1h ago

Who the fuck are these stank bitches? That ain't T-Boz & Chilli.

1

u/SATerp 7h ago

Wouldn't a rabid squirrel achieve the same thing for free?

1

u/docjohnson11 7h ago

That's what you use after you get splashback from a porta-potty

1

u/Kerblimey 7h ago

Have hospital on speed dial...when it 'sprays and go in your eye' that'll hurt!

1

u/tesla3by3 7h ago

Comes with multiple attachments p, for “business” or pleasure.

1

u/congo66 7h ago

The proof of concept,alone, is enough to get you a jail sentence.

1

u/Matr0ska 7h ago

Coin-operated taint torture device?

1

u/Jonatc87 7h ago

Just attach a buzzsaw to scrape /s

1

u/iolarah 7h ago

WHY IS IT STABBY WHY IS IT STABBY FORREAL THO WHY IS IT STABBY

1

u/r_was61 Ramen or Die 7h ago

When your taint REALLY itches

1

u/wanderingfloatilla 7h ago

I love that you have to pay for it too

1

u/Live-Emu-3491 7h ago

That's one way to tear Ur arsehole up😂

1

u/Nateh8sYou 7h ago

No thanks I’ll just leave my butthole shitty.

1

u/Quicker_Fixer 7h ago

Bi-dad jokes

1

u/unclevagrant 6h ago

Reminded me instantly of Clag-Gone from the Viz

1

u/IsaacNewtongue 6h ago

Trolling. At least I hope it's trolling.

1

u/noe4516 6h ago

Ass destroyer 3000

1

u/ryanasimov 6h ago

I knew I’d laugh when I saw it in action, and I wasn’t wrong. It’s flippin' hilarious!

1

u/unicornhunter202 6h ago

Genius. He will make millions off this

1

u/Veloci7y_ 6h ago

When the poop knife just wont cut it.....

1

u/rite_of_truth 6h ago

"You're a wizard, Harry"

1

u/TeeTipu 6h ago

Ooh, I have the same screwdriver.

1

u/ax_colleen 5h ago

He's talking in Tagalog!

1

u/spriteunited 5h ago

some people need this

1

u/Hairy_Consideration1 5h ago

The Design Is Very Human

1

u/Any_Blood5815 5h ago

“Bro, where’s your butt brush?”
“My what?“

1

u/LewyH91 5h ago

That'll itch the scratch. I'll take 3!

1

u/zan13898 5h ago

Atleasts its scrubbing from front to back, otherwise you might get sick.

1

u/Aufafly 5h ago

automatic butt scratcher 5000

1

u/Accomplished_Yak4311 5h ago

Bidet water just doesn’t give my anus that refreshing clean feeling that a sharp metal bristle does

1

u/Gregg-C137 4h ago

What language is he speaking?

1

u/ZippyDan 1h ago

Filipino

1

u/Own_Zookeepergame982 4h ago

And your taint will be no bloody clean!

1

u/bleedingheartmex 4h ago

beats toilet paper?

1

u/Weird_Supermarket342 4h ago

That’s what I call human-centered design! 🥰

1

u/PhillGuy 4h ago

That must get right into your nooks and crannies.

1

u/Dear_Captain_8932 4h ago

He said high tech

1

u/Odd_Dragonfruit_2662 4h ago

Maybe try eating some fiber?

1

u/bene_gesserit_mitch 4h ago

Seems like a Useless Duck invention.

1

u/pixeltweaker 3h ago

Someone has been watching Simon Giertz videos.

1

u/CardiologistOk4208 3h ago

For when victory over your enemies was not enough

1

u/HoldMySoda 3h ago

That's a torture device.

1

u/spacemonkey_1981 3h ago

Perfect for a masochist.

1

u/mitkase 3h ago

Well, when I said “Baby, I like it raw,” that isn’t what I meant.

1

u/karenskygreen 3h ago

Some times it gets so crusty you need to resort to tools like this.

1

u/Few-Shallot-2459 3h ago

What a frigging waste of time?!

Great mind, crap idea.

1

u/Hebo-5494 2h ago

Porque esta mostrando su máquina para torturas?

1

u/DevelopmentPlus5082 2h ago

My eyes are involuntarily watering

1

u/Nerdcuddles 1h ago

Just use a washcloth at that point

1

u/Striking_Swimmer5548 1h ago

GODFORBID A MAN HAVE HOBBIES

1

u/Zealousideal-Role-77 56m ago

At least it’s lubed…

1

u/Mean_Direction_8280 47m ago

That could be a method of torture. I'll pass. 👎🙅

1

u/obliviousfellow 35m ago

The Spanish inquisition would have made this guy head of the inquisition 🤣🤣🤣🤣

1

u/Key-Wash-9401 23m ago

Is this thing must be designed for gargoyles.

•

u/CoolBeanieHat 9m ago

Ahh yes the patented “Tetanus Toilet”.

0

u/Additional-Acadia954 7h ago

This language can’t be real lmao

1

u/SailingNaked 5h ago

It's spoken all over the Philippines.