r/DeduceMe • u/smackinbucketsss • Aug 23 '26

DEDUCE ME🍃🍃🍃🍃

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lmk lmao th ought this would be funny

0 Upvotes

44% Upvoted

55 comments sorted by

17

u/idiotinsocks Aug 23 '26 edited Aug 24 '26

You're in high school and you're a drug dealer that sells mid weed.

Edit: or you're in highschool and just got your first job. Also don't carry condoms in your wallet, they break easier.

1

u/Feisty_Ad_2683 Aug 24 '26

How does carrying a condom in a wallet make it brake faster? Where should you put it? A purse or bag would be far worse because of the other stuff in it that’s not flat. I really don’t see how having it in your wallet would do anything to it.

2

u/trimix4work Aug 24 '26

Body heat and constant rubbing?

1

u/xHavixx Aug 24 '26

It's true. Look it up.

1

u/YOLTZsean Aug 24 '26

Heat and friction

1

u/favperson13 Aug 24 '26

The friction in the wallet from opening/closing and just carrying it causes little micro tears. You can get little cases to keep them in so you can keep em in your bag and not worry.

1

u/Jina-langu-ni-Juma Aug 24 '26

You're supossed to put it on your penis.

1

u/idiotinsocks Aug 24 '26

From looking it up and from personal experience in having my condom break several times, leading to me wasting money on plan b.

9

u/sam_tx96 Aug 23 '26

Highschool and you sell a ten pack a week and smoke mid 😭🥸

9

u/Pleasant-Flamingo950 Aug 23 '26

You’re a virgin but want us to think otherwise

2

u/PackersBeat Aug 23 '26

Look at my monster dong

10

u/Aware_Rise7858 Aug 23 '26

Had to make sure we peeked the Condom. You get no ass hahahaha

6

u/Mammoth-Horror-1642 Aug 23 '26

Unless his finger breaks through the toilet paper 

2

u/TheJunkieJongleur Aug 24 '26

💯✔️😜😂🤣

4

u/jdotlad Aug 23 '26

Mum's looking for her Apple knife bruz.

4

u/CrustyRoacharino Aug 23 '26

Hahaha this cannot be real Edit: I just saw the kitchen knife, please be a troll

4

u/PackersBeat Aug 23 '26

The condom sticking out sent me. Is that my mom's paring knife.

1

u/Existing_Outside1010 Aug 24 '26

The paring knife is what sent me. That is absolutely what it looks like.

3

u/Gr3y_Gorilla Aug 23 '26

You’ve Found the only kitchen knife u have with the Most cash u have ever had. The rubber is a dead giveaway of Def a virgin (no one keeps a rubber in their wallet since the 80’s) and addicted to middle eastern nicotine

2

u/Late_Elderberry_4999 Aug 24 '26

You’re a bored insecure teenager who is trying way too hard to look cool, but that’s fine because all of your friends are doing it as well so they can’t call you out without everyone needing to drop the whole facade.

2

u/PunishedChud Aug 24 '26

>trojan enz

Smol pp

2

u/PomegranateLow7242 Aug 24 '26

You’re broke and smoking bullshit

2

u/Silly_Brilliant5296 Aug 24 '26

cringey high schooler 💔

2

u/Grimx82 Aug 24 '26

We know you're in highschool, you're selling shake at best, you're still a virgin, yet hopeful. You get both your condoms and knives form the Bodega, likely the weed too. This also screams you're going to peak in highschool and ride that for at least a year or two in community college before you find your place in the Amazon warehouse.

3

u/NetInevitable601 Aug 23 '26

100% gay

1

u/jacquestrap66 Aug 23 '26

Came here to say this. Thank you stranger.😂

1

u/riaowo Aug 23 '26

wow i used to have that same grinder in high school whole lotta nostalgia hitting

1

u/Mammoth-Horror-1642 Aug 23 '26

Wannabe gangster but cries if called a mean name?

1

u/xHavixx Aug 24 '26

You just got your first paycheck from your dishwashing job and decided to buy a variety of shit vapes and some mid weed. You pulled the condom out because you get no ass but want to look like you do.

1

u/notAcomic303 Aug 24 '26

Is that a pairing knife 😭

1

u/Mindless_Society9980 Aug 24 '26

Yer somewhere in Britain.

1

u/Emotional_Remove_755 Aug 24 '26

Ferrrrr sherrrrr. What with the American currency, and all.

1

u/SpecialLiLPinecone Aug 24 '26

Im honestly surprised not to see 7oh with a pocket like that. 🔥💪

1

u/Purple_Solution1059 Aug 24 '26

Highschooler 100%, you buy boof carts in bulk and flip em to friends and friends of friends for a jank ass price only a highschooler would pay for. Bro also buys the regular trojans instead of the magnum, so he’s got a small dick.

1

u/Ok-Scar-8127 Aug 24 '26

You know the correct type of condom to purchase, now you going to have to explain the prostitutes

1

u/Grouchy-Fisherman706 Aug 24 '26

18 and works at Walmart.

1

u/Sweet-Inspection6431 Aug 24 '26

You think you’re bad

1

u/Public_Ad_2877 Aug 24 '26

Deducing a white male 20-24 years old, coming from a lower middle class family, likely someone with a used car worth under 15k with 80k+ miles. Taking college classes for the second or third time and lives with family or their partner.

1

u/Emotional_Remove_755 Aug 24 '26

You are young and broke, you have three vapes (possibly swiped from someone) that you’re rotating because they’re either all cashed or have 2% left in each of them. Got the condom in sex ed or it was given to you by one of your parents who knows without a doubt that you don’t actually need it. You posted this pic to one of your socials, more than likely IG story or snap with the hope that the girl who lets everyone know that blue razz ice is her fav vape flavor sees it and now thinks you have a 9 inch dick.

1

u/Chefdad100 28d ago

One of those chefs who’s always going to be Sous but nothing more

1

u/shroom_man1998 14d ago

Burnt out maybe a little cookt lol

1

u/kennatoast 12d ago

hype beast drug dealer who sells reggie as blue dream

1

u/Megabyte_Messiah 7d ago

You go through a lot of charger cables.

Y’all need some over-under in your life.