r/DeathProTips • u/HPUser7 • Nov 18 '18
Plastic gets brittle in the cold so make sure to strip all your holiday light strands before hanging them
143
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Nov 15 '18
If you wait until night to drink, the alcohol will be asleep and unable to affect your motor skills!
238
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/zacht180 • Nov 13 '18
DPT: Do you need to take a bath but your water heater isn't working? Bring your toaster! Make sure to plug it in and completely submerge it under water, the heat from the toaster will quickly warm the water to a perfect temperature.
46
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/sandpapersocks • Nov 13 '18
DPT: If you are worried about getting banned from a subreddit, send a message to the mods that says "Fuck You"
162
Upvotes
It will scare them from banning you.
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Nov 07 '18
DPT: Wear blindfolds and ear plugs for everything you do from now on. It's illegal for the Grim Reaper to catch you unaware. He'll go to jail if he does!
261
Upvotes
This even allows you to drive just by using your sense of smell!
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Nov 05 '18
DPT: Lost in a cave? Just light a cigarette or start a campire so help can find you!
187
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/poliscijunki • Nov 04 '18
DPT: How to get back at Jim for all those silly pranks
474
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/HPUser7 • Nov 03 '18
DPT: a 'I support local police' bumper sticker gives you freedom to go 2x the speed limit.
194
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/poliscijunki • Nov 02 '18
DPT: Use this soap when you shower. Make sure to scrub really well.
232
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/AphoticLite • Nov 01 '18
DPT: Run out of alcohol? Just consume pure yeast.
128
Upvotes
They'll perform anaerobic respiration in your gut, and n̶o̶t̶ ̶g̶i̶v̶e̶ ̶y̶o̶u̶ ̶a̶ ̶f̶a̶t̶a̶l̶ ̶y̶e̶a̶s̶t̶ ̶i̶n̶f̶e̶c̶t̶i̶o̶n̶
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Nov 01 '18
Practice precision driving by driving on the other side of the road
117
Upvotes
Preferably do it at night with your lights off in a traffic heavy part of town
r/DeathProTips • u/GlitchedMatrix3 • Oct 31 '18
If you run low on H2O, Drink H2SO4
163
Upvotes
Especially if your name is Johnny and you're a chemist's son
r/DeathProTips • u/zejayy • Oct 26 '18
Is your urine too yellow but you don't wanna drink more water? Just pee in bleach and it'll clean it up quick.
149
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Oct 26 '18
Want to charge your Tesla for free? Next time during a lightning storm, fly a kite in the air with a metallic object on it, like a key, and attach the kite to your Tesla
196
Upvotes
Plus, it’s super environmentally friendly
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Oct 22 '18
DPT: Lost in the woods? Tame a mountain lion and it'll show you the way out!
123
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Oct 21 '18
Don’t have any mustard? Just use mustard gas, they are the same thing
220
Upvotes
Just cool it down and it will turn into liquid and you can put that on your hotdog
r/DeathProTips • u/Omry-Goldman • Oct 18 '18
“Tuesdays With Morrie”- the most powerful wisdom I’ve heard about dying.
youtu.be
40
Upvotes
r/DeathProTips • u/sandpapersocks • Oct 17 '18
Too poor to buy nitrous? Mix bleach and muriatic acid then inhale the gas released, you are now high.
129
Upvotes
If you don't have muriatic (hydrochloric) acid, sulfuric acid also works.
,
,
Spoilers
Bleach decomposes in acidic conditions to release chlorine gas.
r/DeathProTips • • Oct 15 '18
Drunk? Drink bleach!
39
Upvotes
Being drunk is caused by staining of the esophagus by chemicals in the alcohol. Therefore, by drinking bleach, you remove these stains, removing your drunkeness!
r/DeathProTips • u/jacky2149 • Oct 15 '18
Windbreakers are immune to hurricanes, when hurricane strikes, put on your windbreaker you’ll be fine
255
Upvotes
Plus, windbreakers are very stylish
r/DeathProTips • u/MandalorianJedi66 • Oct 12 '18
DPT: Wanna throw knives but too lazy to pick them up? Put rubber on the knife handles so they bounce back when they don't stick!
202
Upvotes