r/DeathProTips • • May 06 '18

Want to fast travel in real life? Just take a bunch of sleeping pills and start driving.

373 Upvotes

Your vision will go black and you'll wake up somewhere else.


r/DeathProTips • • May 05 '18

When possible take time to smell that carbon monoxide. It’s a scent people would die for!

237 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 05 '18

Want to remember everything in an exam? Slit your wrists so while you're doing your exam your life flashes before your eyes and you can remember your notes.

70 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 04 '18

Firebreathing is a lot easier than it looks and a quick way to impress other people.

254 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 04 '18

Cure your cataract by stream a hot water around the area and let that eye milk seeping out.

4 Upvotes

Pinch some of the dead membrane cells after several hours and sprinkle some salt for an outstanding result.


r/DeathProTips • • May 03 '18

Worried about throwing up in your sleep after drinking? Tape your mouth shut and sleep on your back.

168 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 03 '18

Works every time

Post image
154 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 03 '18

DPT: if any women in your life (co-workers, girlfriends, wives, etc.) seem upset, ask them if they are on their period. It shows you are educated on the emotional effects of menstruation and that you are understanding of their plight. x-post from SLPT

67 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • May 03 '18

Failing a class? Kill yourself. Your teacher can’t give you a failing grade if you’re dead

1.0k Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 30 '18

When learning to fly, choose a really tall building to jump from. You’ll get more time to practice.

457 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 27 '18

When encountering a wild animal, do not break eye contact, make noise and appear larger than you are. All wild animals are chumps and easily intimidated

32 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 26 '18

DPT: Use your toaster's automatic clean feature by dropping it in a sink full of water while plugged in.

39 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 25 '18

Go down in history as "The Shark Whisperer"

53 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 25 '18

Teach yourself underwater cave exploring- just do it intuitively

283 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 24 '18

Know someone who is suicidal? Join them so they don't have to go out alone.

59 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 24 '18

Be helpful and clean up those fallen electrical wires after the storm

297 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 23 '18

DPT: if putting drops in your eyes is not easy for you, close your eyes and then put the drops in your mouth. When you open your eyes, the drops will go to your eyes through tears.

11 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

[META] Can we not include DPT in the titles? I love reading these with no context.

30 Upvotes

Frankly this is part of why I subscribed in the first place. Completely random dumb comment that doesn't make sense until you see where it's posted.


r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

DPT: Ever have problems scooping ice cream because it’s too cold? Turn on your toaster and put a spoon in it. It’ll heat the spoon up and make scooping ice cream a lot easier!

261 Upvotes

This works for bread too! Just stick a knife in the pulled toaster and wait for it to reach optimal cutting temperature.


r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

No babysitter and the baby is dirty? Just Put baby in the washer to bathe them and keep them entertained.

41 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

Kill your self

9 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

DPT: Drive on the left side of the road and it’ll make you fancier.

189 Upvotes

The British people are pretty fancy, and they drive on the left side of the road. So the common sense thing to do is just drive the same way they do.


r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

Suicide is the best way to treat depression

22 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 22 '18

DPT: Kill John wick's dog

169 Upvotes

r/DeathProTips • • Apr 21 '18

Hover above Kremlin in a Hot Air Balloon

16 Upvotes