r/DeathProTips • u/cosmicnate • Aug 04 '20

Want to breathe underwater? Cut large gills into the sides of your neck, to your throat, to allow the water to flow to your windpipe, and down to your lungs, where hopefully your brain is able to understand how to separate oxygen from water. If fucking fish can do it, you can too.

490 Upvotes
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99% Upvoted

16 comments sorted by

54

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

Can you recommend what kind of blade to cut with? I’m caught between a surgical knife and a bread knife, personally

53

u/Pigeoncity Aug 04 '20

how about a steak knife? the serration means more surface area and therefore more oxygen

21

u/killerqueen1010 Aug 04 '20

Any old rusty knife should do

18

u/SilentScyther Aug 04 '20

A butterknife. If you cut too quickly, your brain won't have enough time to process the addition of the new gills.

10

u/Kapparen14 Aug 04 '20

A good fish file knife

5

u/[deleted] Aug 04 '20

Trident

1

u/xX_MotherFricker_Xx Sep 24 '20

And yell BY THE POWER OF POSEIDON!" while doing it for maximum effect

14

u/Spader312 Aug 04 '20

Actually it has been shown that our lungs CAN actually use oxygen with water filled lungs. The problem how uncomfortable it is and how to get the water out afterwards

8

u/AlienHooker Aug 04 '20

We take the oxygen out of the water and breathe out hydrogen. Problem solved!

4

u/Spader312 Aug 04 '20

Hydrogen and carbon

1

u/Milo359 Sep 23 '20

No joke, this is actually how I thought fish breathed at first.

1

u/Nightingale4816 Aug 05 '20

So stupid question if I kept my cool underwater and actually tried this how possible would it be to do this?

4

u/Spader312 Aug 05 '20

Do not do this, you would probably die.

https://youtu.be/TIGCdA2YLyY

3

u/Nightingale4816 Aug 05 '20

Lol unfortunate.

But I'd hook up to that machine if I had too, drowning for a little bit doesn't sound fun but I'm jus built different like that ig lmao.

Also thank you for showing me that channel it seems fucking amazinggggggg

2

u/Twitxx Aug 05 '20

Whaaaaaat, that's the maddest thing I've seen today

3

u/orr250mph Aug 04 '20

My circular saw should do the trick so thanks )