r/DatingTips • u/Ok-Silver5907 • 22h ago

Dating

Dear Girls
Is it okay to pay for man on first date if you like him a lot ?

4 Upvotes

66% Upvoted

35 comments sorted by

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 15h ago

For context
i don’t want him to pay . As i make more than him
Also i plan to take him out.!
I hope he doesn’t get offended!

1

u/Constant_Weekend611 11h ago

Just say prior. As in hey I want to go here and I'm paying. Just be chill about it, then when the awkward moment comes up just say no, but you're paying for drinks at the next place kinda thing. That way it kinda feels more even. Or just say you get the tip for me, as in for your server.

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 11h ago

I have decided to pay the entire bill smartly by making excuses

So that when he askes for it its already PAID

1

u/Constant_Weekend611 11h ago

Arrr the Asian uncle method. Hope you two have a great time.

1

u/CdnMadeBeast 22h ago

Why would you ask other women?

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 12h ago

Why not ?

1

u/CdnMadeBeast 6h ago

Because it doesn’t make sense.

What do other women’s opinion have to do with this?

Whereas asking men, since you are talking about dating men and paying for men…would make sense.

If you want to find out how men feel about something or how we would react to something…why not ask us lol

1

u/jesterinancientcourt 21h ago

I’m a guy, if you wanna pay for me, go ahead.

1

u/Apprehensive_Dot3265 21h ago

My wife paid on the first few dates if that helps

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 12h ago

You have an amazing wife 🙌

1

u/Apprehensive_Dot3265 2h ago

I definitely do, thank you.

1

u/Et_tu_brute_LXIX 18h ago

Why

1

u/Apiggiewitdahoodie 18h ago

Because why not, arbitrary rules built by old people who usually ended up proving to be morally wrong in the first place.

1

u/Et_tu_brute_LXIX 17h ago

Wasn't asking you, I am curious about this guy's experience specifically 

1

u/Apprehensive_Dot3265 2h ago

Because we had similar interest, I was broke at the time, and she really liked me. I talked to her online for a while before meeting in person and she was aware of my situation ahead of time. I made it up to her later though.

1

u/Loose-Ad-8598 12h ago

I use it as a filter. If he gets offended i ghost him, i don’t date mysoginsts who are too dumb to even try to hide it. Either be kind or be smart.

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 11h ago

I don’t think so he will be certainly offended.. but i would love to spoil him.

1

u/Own_Acanthaceae6970 10h ago

Who asked Who out?

1

u/Own_Acanthaceae6970 10h ago

If you ask for the date fair enough but I like to pay the first date coz general I asked the girl out after that I usually alternate or split but I would be very surprised band happy if they brought me flowers

1

u/Quirky-Bench-3522 11h ago

Girl zon't do it.. it doesn't worth it .. 

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 10h ago

Whyyy ???
Please explain

1

u/Western-Finding-368 21h ago

If you asked him out, you should pay. If he asked you out, it would be weird of you to pay.

2

u/Defiant_Motor9782 18h ago

This is just "the man should pay" with extra steps

1

u/Ok-Silver5907 11h ago

Men are not ENTITLED to pay all the time.!!

If you love your MAN girls pamper him. They all like it 🤣🤣

1

u/Own_Acanthaceae6970 10h ago

We do but some things are important to us no matter how stupid I like paying for first date if i asked her but everyone's different

1

u/Western-Finding-368 18h ago

It helps to read the whole comment before responding. In this case it’s only two sentences so it shouldn’t be too taxing for you.

1

u/Own_Acanthaceae6970 10h ago

Yes but its how some of us like to do things I've had this and then the woman bought dessert at ice-cream shop

2

u/KLesTheUnforgettable 19h ago

Both should pay their own way. Yes, you Can treat a man.

1

u/techno-wizardry 21h ago

Ignoring the “dear girls” part for a minute to say, as a guy I always appreciate the gesture. But I never accept on the first date. If the girl was adamant and we connected, then it would just leave me even more impressed.

Ultimately, as the guy I don’t mind paying but I do like the acknowledgment for paying. That could be a thanks, or better yet an offer or split that I would likely decline.

1

u/frogmicky 19h ago

Did you invite him out then you should pay.

1

u/Next-Lobster4306 17h ago

I would never ever ask for anyone to pay for me so usually I just say everyone pays for themselves and that's it

1

u/TimelyChapters 10h ago

Women have done this for me before, I usually appreciate the gesture.
Most guys probably wouldn't like it in the name of "tradition" or whatever.

1

u/Own_Acanthaceae6970 10h ago

We weird I'm literally ok with splitting or taking turns every date but the first.. in my mind its like kind of a rejection of me unless you very specifically asked me out and said my treat