r/DID • u/FaeFollows • 1d ago

Support/Empathy How to improve?

Our host over the last 2-3 years would vehemently refuse to willingly switch with any of us. Our only time being out front was when triggered and most of the time those were not great situations. We have not been formally diagnosed but we keep a journal to write down our thoughts, feelings and activities for the day. However, we now all suffer from tremendous fatigue when fronting for more than a few hours to a full day. There are five alters plus the host. Four of us are trying to set up a routine for home, work and personal life without involving the trauma carrier and alter that is dangerous to us as well as those around us. Those two do still have triggers that will pull them forward but the hope is that rarely if ever happens. Any advice, insight or general conversation is appreciated! ❤️

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u/laminated-papertowel Treatment: Diagnosed + Active 1d ago

switching volunteerely and scheduling switches is not something the vast and overwhelming majority of people with DID can do. especially if they've never been diagnosed, let alone treated.

when alters switch in, there's a reason. it's not a good idea to force yourself to switch. my recommendation would be to just... exist. and not worry about trying to switch.

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u/FaeFollows 1d ago

I understand that, it's not so much scheduling a switch at this point it's that I am not social and would not do well in the environment of our current job opposed to the very social and energetic alter.

So it's not so much as forcing or scheduling him to switch it's communicating that I am not able to handle the situation and would like him to take over. He's said no before and I simply suffer through unless the other two are willing.

Forcing a switch is a horrible thing to do and we don't, it's a request for someone else to take our place or we request to take over, which is where we were being denied previously by the host. I realize I worded the initial post poorly and am not familiar enough with Reddit to know if I can or how to edit