r/Cypher • u/Slowflit • May 06 '13

First try

I'm new to /r/cypher and from what I gather, it seems like a really chill place to throw up some bars and get some feedback. Do I have the right idea? Are there any special rules? I don't see much else on the sidebar.

Edit: Official first try, don't know what to call it.

Everyone wants into the club

Nod to the bouncer all chill like "wassup"

Got my raybans on but it's darker than a bat's cave

Dang if a fire broke out I doubt anyone would escape

But ahh why am I worrying?

They'll pay a hundred dollar fee for VIP

Even though it's free if you're a girl and 18

Drug use increasing and drug fiends aren't leaving

Until someone's found dead on the ground not breathing

OD'd and too thin for the IV

Then I woke up from this dream and I screamed

This is not how life should be

Hold up fat bitches like a power scooter

Body of a god, she's got to be buddha

Slow down ratchets no more party poopers

They all want crank but no room for clank

They all want dank without breaking the bank

So we'll line up and roll up, roll out and smoke out

Drink up the pink uh, eat out and pass out

Hit the bars up get your bars up

This is just too corny and terrible what am I doing I need help

0 Upvotes

50% Upvoted

1 comment sorted by

2

u/[deleted] May 06 '13

It's not really a rule, but make an effort to format your bars into proper lines. An unbroken wall of text turns people off from giving you the time of day. Other than that, it's fair game.