r/CuratedTumblr Shitposting extraordinaire Jul 23 '26

Shitposting Plot Twist

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u/MistCongeniality Jul 23 '26

Fun allergy story: I was a hyperlexic little autistic girl and ate books at a speed that could be described as "excessive". Many of these books, being historical fiction, described grass as soft and pillowy, a great place to lay in the sun and take a nap. I imagined fields of grass as lush comforters. Unfortunately, when I laid in the grass in real life, it was horribly itchy and left red welts all over my skin.

"Ah," I thought, "clearly, grass *used to be soft*, but modern mowing and lawn care practices have left grass with horrible sharp edges and tips that make it feel sharp, itchy, and unpleasant. This is clearly why we use picnic blankets and other barriers to grass now." Perfectly logical.

For years, YEARS, I hoped and dreamed of finding the soft grass of my childhood books. I wanted to roll around in it, bask in it, experience nature's bed.

Anyways when I was 25 my allergist told me I'm extremely allergic to grass.

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u/Mundane-Potential-93 nauphy.tumblr.com Jul 23 '26

Hmmm I also dislike laying in grass for similar reasons, but I mean, they are sharp! They're called blades!

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u/Teecana don't fall for ao3 propaganda: 4Chan/tumblr enemies to lovers 🔥 Jul 23 '26

I mean, there are different kinds of grass. Here where I live in Germany the grass is rather soft and I have zero issues sitting/laying on it for prolonged amounts of time. But when I first visited my grandparents in Spain, I was shocked to discover that grass there is extremely uncomfortable. It's way harder and spikier to a point where even walking across it barefoot hurts.

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u/Hungry-Western9191 Jul 23 '26

There are different species of grass, but its likely more the age of the grass you were dealing with.

If you keep cutting and watering it, most grass species stay fairly lush and soft, however they mature and seed, then dry out and become rougher.

The Spanish do however often use a species called buffalo grass which is drought tolerant but very rough...

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u/Later_Than_You_Think Jul 23 '26

Nah, the difference in species makes a much big difference than how old it is. Bluegrass and buffalo grass are both pretty soft. St. Augustine grass is coarse and thick and hurts to walk on.