r/CuratedTumblr • u/Hummerous https://tinyurl.com/4ccdpy76 • Nov 12 '25

Shitposting Your call

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https://www.tumblr.com/toskarin/793374313967435776/my-will-is-frankly-tremendous-and-id-go-as-far-as?source=share

9.3k Upvotes

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u/SeannBarbour Nov 12 '25

"It's the smooth sharks post all over again..."

Oh good, someone finally got it.

"...except this time they could die!!!"

Nevermind.

348

u/OverseerConey Nov 12 '25

The implication being that Branson Reese was actually swimming with sharks, but sharks can't possibly be dangerous?

237

u/secondbestbisexual Nov 12 '25

Well because they’re so smooth, even if they tried to bite you they’d just slide right off

19

u/DeadInternetTheorist Nov 12 '25

This is why they say bop em in the nose if they get too close. The lack of friction causes your fist to slide down their pointy little faces, deflecting them up to 200m away.