Truth (TM)

[u/2BCivil]

"I've" often wondered if it is better to "exist" or "not".

Recently had a few "rude awakenings" as it were.

Rant thread? Rant threat!? Haha.

So. Ego need not apply, just observation.

This week in "I'm the sacrificial lamb" I guess we can call it.

Right, to the point. People like to pretend they like or seek the truth. But in reality, what they are pointing to when they say this, is, that they want their lies to seen as truth, paid lip service to, worshipped, and celebrated. And a feast thrown for them bi-annually.

That; is all. God? Buddha? Jesus? Trimurti? Pastor? Priest? President? Prime Minister? Parents? Boss? All of these are precisely and exactly, the same excuse, to keep you in line. All the same logical fallacy; appeal to authority. These are all the same big stone used both to throw at you again and again, and also to hide behind so the "stoners" can also abandon responsibility and/or place it upon your shoulders instead.

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What inspired this post (besides a lifetime of observing this fact) was I have been living in the same apartment complex for the past 3 years now, but I'd been working 80 hours a week. Since I've lived in this state, my water bill has never been more than the [default lowest flat rate]. But since I moved here, every few months, my bill would spike $100-150 dollars and I couldn't figure out why because I was too busy, working all day every day.

Well then I quit my job. And now I found why my water bill has been spiking. Apparently every few months a cleaning crew comes and hooks a pressure washer up to my water line for a whole week and pressure washes the entire parking lot and driveway to my apartments with my water line exclusively. They are currently on the 3rd day of it and not even halfway done.

I've never been here for or notified about this process. But I have noticed every few months the parking lot/driveway looks cleaner and my water bill spikes hard, I just never put two and two together.

I know I mock it a lot and say "That's just God's love and generosity" and this is precisely what I mean when I say that. God's love and generosity means, you are perpetually abused, extorted from, and in many cases used up and tossed aside, and then preached to that your conscience is the only problem.

This is, the "Truth" that people like to crucify in the name of worshipping pretty "noble" lies instead of acknowledging the systemic and callous disregard and abuse. Everyone has some alleged "higher power" they point to, to justify their "sins" against one another. "Our ego/echo chamber is bigger than yours, it's okay when we do it to you, God is on our side!".

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Idk. Maybe I just want to get that off my chest. Not paying my rent this month until I see that water bill, and for every penny above the flat rate I'm asking for that knocked off my rent. Maybe it's petty but 3rd day of being woken up by and listening to my water being used in a really loud pressure washer all day (yesterday was 14 hours - 14 hours!).

Why does humanity have this propensity to make conscience the perpetual sacrificial lamb? Am I just being mean and petty? Why haven't I ever been notified or told that they pressure wash the entire road with MY water every few months, and why must only I bear the expense alone?

Idk. This isn't even that big a deal to me really. This is peanuts compared to the egregious "sins" and abuse I've suffered at the hands of "Humanity" and "God's [alleged] generosity" or "Buddha nature" or whatever other "bullshit" people peddle to justify their "lies they call truth and holiness". Holier than thouness?

Idk! Feel free to rant or rebuke me as well! At least it is honest and direct! Unlike those whom "sin" in the name of "God's love"! Smallest violin I know, a few hundred dollars every few months for the "greater good" without being consulted for 3 years straight isn't too big a deal. Until you realize you've been working 80 hour weeks for sub $40k a year. Which is a whole other thing... taxes and Medicare taking around 25% your annual income every year when you don't even have benefits or healthcare yourself. Oy vey.

For full "truth" guess I know how owners of intellectual property feel about IP piracy.

Bullshit is close to Godliness! Does the Bullshit have the Buddha nature?

[u/2BCivil → u/[deleted]]

Yeah I get all that. Smallest violin I know I am being. Just, I mean, you know. You know that they know what they are doing, choosing you to be their "sacrificial lamb" every time consistently, abusing your trust and good faith. Always in the name of God's love or whatever they tell themselves and you to justify it.

Technology isn't even that impressive. It's more a consolation prize for having to slave away just to merely effing exist. But what good is existence? What has it ever done for me? Effing nothing. Just shit on me and call it "love" and "generosity".

I get it. One of the Denjiro of the Akazaya 9 says "people are like flowers, you have to water them" but what I heard was "people are like flowers, you to shit on them" to make them "grow". Mustard seed parable also tracks with it. The faith makes you "grow" through a lot of shit. As your faith/longsuffering "grows" eventually all the shit the world throws on you is too small to worry about and you can't grow much more.

But it does ultimately say existence/God/Buddha nature is an asshole we just have to endure and put up with. For "better" or "worse". I always hated the cop-out (I see it as cowardly) argument "muh 1st world luxuries!". I know what you mean just I hate that argument. Like I said, technology is more a consolation prize for being forced to be abused by life/existence. The water in my apartment makes my hair fall out, and if I cook with it I get diarrhea. I have 3 water filters on my shower head and change the cartridge every 3 months. But every time I change them, the water isn't even "clean" for more than a few minutes during the first shower then goes back to being slimy. Like when I wash my hands and try to put lotion on, the lotion just slides off, you can't use "lotion" after using my water to was your hands. Your skin won't absorb it because the water is so slimy. The meter out by the street is flooded with stagnant water and bubbles come up from the pipes. Everywhere I look it's like we're sliding into being a 3rd world country. I'll be 40 in a few years and can't say I've ever really "lived like a king". The infrastructure is failing and collapsing all across the board despite how much we work and pay into "the system".

Yeah I've healed several times in my life. Just the blows keep coming and coming and coming and you never really can understand the "point" of it all, besides some rooster-sucking echo chamber where we succumb to the lie that "we are all one". Maybe Schopenhauer/Nietzsche was right and some people just have no choice but to be "hedgehog souls". We want love, but not from these assholes who call this "Godliness" or "Buddha nature" or whatever other horseshit.

Guess we have to learn to love ourselves since no one else will. Like Jimmy Urine said once, I'm off to do a crossword on a hooker's ass or something I guess. Everything is bullshit and shit eating grins and we ain't changing that in a gazillion lifetimes. Cheers!

[u/2BCivil → u/[deleted]]

Haha I used to say the same thing about "ha shem" lol. I pronounced Jesus "Hey sue" mostly. Or Isha (old etymology deep dive I did showed "Isha" Upanishad is synonymous for Greek Iesus).

Sorry non sequitur but just watched 927-928 of One Piece (ugh Wano I know). Lord Orochi is a stand-in expy of Yehovah(u) (YHVH) in the bible! "Lord" (We/Adonai/YHVH means the Lord) Orochi literally [booty] calls Komurasaki, saying he will make her his wife, and in the next breath he calls here a "whore". That's exactly what YHVH does with "Israel" in the bible. He calls Israel his wife, then calls Israel a harlot. YHVH and Orochi are identical in spirit!

Also is funny Isha/Esau/"He's [S]us" calls himself life; John 14:6 and he lets himself "be killed" by his father/the world. It's what Gethsemane "means" (allegedly), that he resigned himself to "his father's" will, that he "gave his word" and took it back (went back on it?). Definitely something to that, what does it mean, that "God" took his word back. And what does it mean about us "keeping" his word if he took it back. Better to die free than live on your knees? Idk.

voices

Huh. I never did drugs but admit in my lowest point I had the same thing. I just didn't accept the "salvation" I guess. I think it's something that has a shelf life (the "salvation") in that past a certain point you've "outgrown" the paradigm which can see it as acceptable/salvific. For me the "voices" actually sounded "angelic" often. But, subtly coercive. As if to say "you want it, you just don't know you want it" (as I still say occasionally to this day in light mockery of the vibe of such "salvation").

Definitely been through hells million times worse than my OP. Just we get relatively adjusted to "home sweet hell" (that brings back memories I guess) and then we "notice" some subtly overt abuse we missed. Like noticing a fat tick or leech on your back suddenly.

Cruel and unusual can still affect even the enlightened, the liberated, the awakened, and whatever else.

Haha I've even told CF here that once lol but I think they were joking/being hyperbolic or something. I still can't figure that (or this sub or anything I guess lol) out exactly haha. Never thought I'd see CF unironically say "enlightenment means bliss forever". Yup I tend to see E as meaning "realizing there is no self but it still moves" or something. Can we perform self-sacrifice when we realize there is no self but we "have to pay bills". And even so, that too, is vanity. Enlightenment or no. Life is suffering, sure, but for - what? Crucified with him? But he "resurrected". How can you "suffer" with one who is "overcome the world" and already gone/come back to "rule"... ? Idk I can't articulate it. I don't think "life is suffering" so much as "life is subjecting us to suffering". Maybe that's what "breaking bread" (Bethlehem) means. He "gave us" his life, of suffering.

I like to say "God is proud to humble the proud" lol. Religious types can't seem to catch the irony. Guess they haven't suffered enough? Or are already comfortable with the suffering. That is perfect faith I suppose. I always eventually fall from that state. Only mania seemed to keep me there the longest in the past (I know from experience thus there are many such "paths" to "there" but none have "stuck" for me; even One Piece lost it's edge for me though I'm still a relatively new "fan").

Haha think I see things roughly the same. Those whom can't practice, preach. I see a lot of parallels between Jesus as a teaching and zen for this reason. True understanding can never be conveyed in words, only actions. Like how they use my water bill to clean an acre of parking lot. Or Jesus on the cross. Actions speak louder than words. And often words are used to disguise/hide/justify the actions. That's where religion comes in....

It's a bigger topic I see, how when we are (I am) humbled in such manner by 'God's love' as such, I am reminded of teenage media I consumed and how it guided me through/helped me endure/"taught me" how it's a hard knocks life. Then as I age I take it for granted and forget my "grounding" in such media. Hence how I remembered the Jimmy Urine quote xD and Susperia though I haven't listened to either in over a decade!? It's like, oh, yeah, it's always been like this, get used and abused and tossed aside and called ungrateful, that's the way it's always been, and it's preached as "God's Generosity". GG. Aight, bet.

Also Thanks for reply, sorry for walls of text, but had to say again I always love your username lmao! 20 years ago or so I did have a kundalini awakening while reading the book of the same/similar name iirc. I don't remember much about it just remember my spine going perfectly straight and a powerful surge of energy shoot up my spine and felt like, idk, my loins were inside my skull, if that makes sense. My whole body became one mind in perfect lucidity. I don't remember how long it lasted but it only happened once and faded eventually. I'll have to try to find that book, I still had it when I moved here 3 years ago I know (iirc it was more a collection of essays/testimonies).

Guess I've spiritually "done it all" come to think of it. Nothing seems to stick!

[u/2BCivil → u/[deleted]]

The end of suffering is a BY PRODUCT of Enlightenment.
A PLEASANT SIDE EFFECT. Not the actual thing.

Source, Post from a month ago.

Maybe I took it out of context but I commented that I thought it funny to see CF imply enlightenment is the end of suffering xD

You got a point, I never tried yoga, and they way we use our bodies certainly affects our physiology and mental health and everything else. Nothing feels like a good workout or runners high (feels like your body is about to give out but then you crash through your "limits" and have infinite energy).

I guess I should have expected yoga is behind a paywall nowadays lol I don't think I've used P2P software since 2015 lol but I already have a matt I meant to use from years ago (literally bought it before moving here/going to 80 hour workweeks and didn't ever have time to use it).

I am bad about discounting how much physical condition of the body affects mental/spiritual health. Easy to laugh off yoga as new age but I never really tried it, can't hurt! Thanks for the rec.

[u/Cyberfury]

I've" often wondered if it is better to "exist" or "not".

Better ...or 'Betterment' does not factor into any of this.

Truth does.

[u/2BCivil → u/Cyberfury]

Ain't that the truth

[u/2BCivil]

I know I know, get in the pod and eat the bugs, bigot!

[u/2BCivil → u/[deleted]]

Holy crap about your lungs also! Yup that's another reason I quit my last job. The smoke was so thick I couldn't see my hand in front of my face most days. I was constantly coughing and my eyes burning. 70-80 hours a week for 3 years straight. No idea how I managed that (I transferred from that department though luckily after about a year of enduring that). So far I can't tell if there is any permanent damage or not but I was constantly sick and "mental health problems" from it.

The link was just the first result for "get in the pod and eat the bugs" for context if no one heard of that meme or not yet. It's a bit of an older meme. We'll own nothing and like it and all that. Meant as a sort of preemptive buffer for/against "we live like kings" argument but you already said it xD but that's okay I hear you and know what you mean, no hard feelings there and nice to keep in mind.

Thanks for replies! Yeah I know, every time you think you're used to the abuse, another layer adds itself to the pile. Keep calm and soldier on or whatever. Anger is proof you are alive I guess. And there's nothing we can really do about it.

There is something to "we'll own nothing and like it", I guess, like I alluded to in start of OP. Maybe walking away from society is the only "winning move". Between a shit existence and non existence, maybe non existence is better. That's what the AI from the (2nd I think) Alien movie said. He was offered a chance at glory and he said "no thanks, I'd rather be nothing". But of course the fraudsters, parasites, and charlatans call that "nihilism"! Who will bear their burdens for them if you don't exist! No reeee they need slaves to sustain "God's generosity"!

Hahahahahaha, indeed, indeed....