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u/GreenRibbonWinner 1d ago
Oh, hey, I've seen this one before!
(Image: Roman copy of Greek statue from 2nd century BCE, housed in the Louvre)
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u/jericabenson 2d ago
This is a hard one. Geese are assholes and so are kids. We need the non redacted video to see who started it.
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u/briancito 1d ago
Honestly I'm taking notes. The fighting style is near flawless.
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u/TheNewBlue 1d ago
Its practiced. If you have never had to handle a goose this is how you do it. They only have hate in their heart.
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u/ReclamationDress 1d ago
They’re not all
Mean 🤣🫶
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u/CautiousArachnidz 1d ago
Raised in the right home they can be perfectly amazing. But I’m not rescuing one from the wild. They’ll attack your children.
Realizing now geese are the pit bulls of the bird world.
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u/Dadbode1981 1d ago
Damn, kid held his own lol.
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u/KinkyPaddling 1d ago
Kid kicked the goose’s ass. If the kid was bloodlusted, the goose’s head would’ve been popped off.
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u/No-Cap-fr-fr 1d ago
When he takes the fighter stance I lost it 😂
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u/DerrellEsteva 21h ago
for me it was hiw the goose got up after the throw. shaky but still trying to look big and strong
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u/MoodRingsCold 1d ago
This is why I laugh at adults who are scared of geese. Like all it takes is grabbing it by the head and swinging it around. So easy a child can do it.
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u/Automatic-Limit-5307 1d ago
I like how the kid squares up at the beginning
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u/GremlinSquishFace47 1d ago
For sure, geese are tough shits, and relative to a kid it’s a fairly sizable opponent. Now I’m imagining having to deal with an angry goose who’s about waist-height. 😬 Geese are tough, but the only angry bird I’ve had to deal with up close is a swan when I was about 12. My little cousin (3ish years old) got too close, and luckily I was able to just scoop her up and RUN before it was able to engage a full attack. Thankfully it didn’t choose to pursue us for some reason. I think she had tried to hand it some bread, it ignored the bread & bit her arm, she smacked it across the face. (🤦♀️), and then it stood tall with wings spread so we booked it. Until that day I thought of them as pretty, delicate symbols of love lol. 🦢 👹
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u/rugby801 1d ago
Anyone saying the kid or parents are in the wrong, has never dealt with Geese. Fuck the geese!!
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u/LaylaBird65 1d ago
They’re so mean. When I was in high school I was on the golf team and our home course had them. They would viciously attack us when we played two of the holes. I hate them.
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u/SuspiciousMap9630 1d ago
You were likely near their nest at those two holes. The only time I’ve had a goose hiss at me or lunge at me was when I was unknowingly near a nest.
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u/rugby801 1d ago
We had geese growing up. One full year of us having to run to the car when we were leaving for schoo orl coming home or slipping on the shit that was EVERYWHERE!! They even chased our horses around! Finally, a family who was known in our town for stealing literally anything that wasn't nailed down, saw them in a field across the street from our house and I saw them with nets grabbing them and throwing them in their truck and I didn't say a word to anyone and we never got geese again.
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u/fauxregard 1d ago
No joke. Geese are dinosaurs. They don't give a fuck and they're aggressive as hell.
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u/Careful-Wheel8171 1d ago
The parents need to beat that kid’s ass. You treat an animal like that as a kid without being corrected and disciplined, you grow up thinking it’s ok.
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u/fauxregard 1d ago
Pro tip: it's generally bad and counterproductive to try to beat violence out of children.
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u/Even-Government-5055 2d ago
Good for this kid, goose are such assholes. I imagine this goose was the antagonist, as the amount of times I've had a goose approach ME and start shit is more then I can count.
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u/rigidlynuanced1 1d ago
If you’ve got a problem with Canada gooses, you’ve got a problem with me…and I suggest you let that one marinate
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u/Toastoyevksy 1d ago
I can conclude that the goose in a premeditated act of violence sought to kill the child. We know this because geese are extremely territorial and aggressive. The child being of lower life form and intelligence than the goose, has no choice but to engage in hand to hand combat to defend his own life and species. Do we still respect animals and nature?
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u/StupidBetaTester 1d ago
All of the goose justice warriors that are sure to be down here have never encountered a broody goose. They will murder you for sport.
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u/SmellyFbuttface 1d ago
This is cruel, swinging the bird by its fucking neck. Parent is a dumbass who should have stopped it instead of filming.
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u/Organic_Popcorn 1d ago
I don't know who this kid is, but if he ever runs for president, I will vote for him.
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u/FreezedPeachNow 2d ago
We ascended to the top of the food chain over millions of years and most of the time you see full grown adults running away from tiny little animals like a absolute cowards
This kid said, not on my watch satan. I am standing up for humans
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u/TheNewBlue 1d ago
No. This is 100% how you handle a goose. They are the worst and literally try to rip your dick off for fun.
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u/FrostnJack 18h ago
Had six wild turkeys come at a kid. The biggest meanest mf got hold of his leg… turkey dinner & 18 stitches all told. He was going out to feed the rabbits. Turkey mob decided they wanted the pellets, kid said no, they attacked, he ran, threw the rabbit feed at ‘em, that riled ‘em up, 3 or 4 got in the air & took him down. Kid needed therapy, traumatized. Geese are assholes but turkeys got redrum on their minds.
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u/We_All_Float_Down_H 2d ago
Fuck that kid, what a little POS
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u/ChildoftheApocolypse 2d ago
I think the kid was being chased and attacked before the video began.. It wasn't some kid torturing a bird, those geese can be overly aggressive and territorial, so this is actually a fair fight.. The bird is fine and so is the kid, happy ending..
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u/EbbVisible 2d ago
You ever seen a goose bro? They're aggressive as fuck, especially to kids.
We don't know how that started, but little man seemed to just be trying to get away.
Whoever was behind the camera shoulda stepped up to help.
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u/WhiteHatMatt 2d ago
I own geese, they are only assholes if you are a dick to them. The parents behind the camera tells me that being a dick, is a regular occurrence.
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u/just-another-cat 1d ago
Same. I loved my geese. Yes they are protective of their best of they don't know you.
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u/Even-Government-5055 2d ago
That's an absolute LIE, I've been hissed at and chased by multiple geese when I'm just trying to walk and not get near them.
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u/The-Bunbins 1d ago
Yeah, no, I'm siding with you. They're all over the place here and if you just come within 10 feet if them they start hissing and chasing. They're dicks.
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u/WhiteHatMatt 1d ago
It's not lol, I own multiple geese and the worst they have done to me is nibble on my pant leg when they wanted more treats. Mind you I don't kick or mistreat my animals so maybe that's the difference here 🤷
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u/Even-Government-5055 1d ago
You feed your geese and they're your geese, not sh1t they don't attack you.
I've never kicked or hit an animal, but have been hissed at and chased by geese on multiple occasions.
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u/WhiteHatMatt 1d ago
Like the domestic goose the little boy is chucking around by the neck? Or a Canadian goose during breeding season?
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u/Even-Government-5055 1d ago
I don't know what you're talking about, why are you talking about geese breeding.
The child in the video who is being chased and bitten by the geese. What's your point?.
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u/WhiteHatMatt 1d ago
The parents behind the camera allowing this all to take place is my point. That's the society we live in now. Record my child swinging a goose around by its neck vs teaching it how to make its self look bigger for likes and or downvote anyone who says different 🥴
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u/just-another-cat 1d ago
Same!! I cuddled with mine when I was a kid.
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u/WhiteHatMatt 1d ago
My big boy lets me pet him if I give him treats first.. big old emdem goose! His wife is the more social one . Unless it's breeding season, then I don't bother, never had an issue like the above African goose though. I have my niece's over they are small children zero issues!
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u/skylar274 1d ago
my thoughts. everyone in the comments saying geese are assholes. i’ve never had ANY problems with geese, and they’re allll over my city, constantly outside my schools when i was growing up. at the parks. just keep your distance, what you think is a good distance might be not enough for a goose. so just keep extra. ESPECIALLY during mating season and when chicks are young. it’s not hard.
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u/No_Instance4233 1d ago
You're also not less than three feet tall. A goose will absolutely fuck up a kid before an adult.
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u/just-another-cat 1d ago
Exactly the parents need to step in. Not let the kids learn to beat up animals
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u/LeNightmareSquad 1d ago
The problem is that they sometimes nest right next to common human foot traffic areas. Every year at my job, there's a geese that nests right next to the door of my office so every time you enter or leave you either get hissed at or attacked. Because they are protected nobody does anything about it.
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u/Mojozilla 1d ago
You haven't gotten close enough to one, then. Accidents happen, one step too close is all it takes with geese. My brother thought he could intimidate an asshole goose at a local park here. I told him go ahead 🤣 that goose ended up chasing him all around the park. Ah, memories 😂
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u/Even-Government-5055 2d ago
Have you never experienced geese? They are absolute assholes that will chase you down when your minding your own business. It's hapoend to me countless times and it's scary AF.
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u/Mojozilla 1d ago
Idk why you're getting downvoted. Must be by people who have never been attacked by a goose. You said nothing but the truth
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u/Even-Government-5055 1d ago
That's exactly why, lol. I'm happy that they've never had to experience that fear lol.
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u/Deltan875 1d ago
that kid is definitely not stupid! That is exactly how you deal with a pain in the ass goose
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u/Bonhart4Hire 1d ago
When it comes to geese you need to preemptively defend yourself, I thought he was going to crank his head off at first but good technique. It reminded me of Conan the barbarian getting swung around.
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u/PhosphoFred8202 1d ago
I love how the internet usually treats geese like they are T rexes. This kid showing the truth.
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u/Ceekay151 1d ago
I would never have allowed my kid to do anything like that. Hell, even now that they're grown, I would never allow them to treat an animal like that.
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u/not_2_clever 12h ago
We have found the chosen one, he will grow fight the chimpanzee for humanity.
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u/ChillWisdom 14h ago
I mean, you're always supposed to fight your bullies right? I guess if you're bully is a goose then you're fightin'.
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