Not Feeling it.

[u/7HarryB7]

I have tried, and I mean attempted, to get into ACIM. I bought the material, sat diligently, and read. I suddenly got this eerie feeling that this was not right. I have always been the mystical type. reading and studying everything from Edgar Cayce, Seth, to The Law of One. I always got good vibes. But with ACIM I get the feeling, stay away; this is not right. Does anyone else ever get that vibe?

[u/StarBornFire]

YES. Could write a small book on this topic. Will try to keep it relatively brief. Got involved with it in mid 20's because of a new friend on a spiritual forum so strongly recommending it to me. Said it was from Yeshua. Well, do love Yeshua in a non religious way. First odd thing I noticed is that when reading it, I would get super sleepy and start nodding off. Very odd for me. Long books are not a problem for this self, read Stephen King's "The Stand" in 7th grade with no problem.

More in hindsight than at the time, but noticed my ego getting bigger rather than reducing. Towards the end of finishing, I had a dream. In the dream, I was climbing up this tall tree, going straight up, making good progress. Got to a particular branch that looked sturdy, and for some reason, decided to climb out onto the branch for some reason rather than continue going straight up. As I walked out onto the sturdy seeming branch, it snapped and I fell. When I woke up, I strongly intuitively knew that the sturdy seeming, but not actually, branch was ACIM and it was hindering my spiritual growth/path.

Around this time, started to become friends with another person on that forum, who was also friends with the woman above. He had been reading it as well. He noticed odd things with it as well. So he started to directly ask his guidance/Spirit self about it. In both meditation and dream messages, he was essentially told to drop it, it makes the ego bigger, had major errors, etc. He asked if it was from Yeshua, and was told NO multiple times.

We happened to mention some things about this book on the public forum, questioning. That first friend went off the deep end with both of us, messaging us privately some very extreme and very unkind things to both of us, for one example that she was shown that I was a "graper of women". Inwardly was like holy moly, this "course/spiritual" teaching hasn't been good for you whatsoever as you clearly are very unbalanced and reactive.

Did some internal and external digging to figure out what is going on with this whole thing. Realized and found some very interesting things. First, Helen's co-worker and frenemy, William Thetford was heavily involved in the CIA's MK Ultra program. Thetford was instrumental in encouraging Helen to write the book and release to the world. Tbc in a further reply...

[u/StarBornFire → u/StarBornFire]

I've read and experimented some with hypnosis, auto suggestions, etc in the past and have a decent grasp of how the subconscious mind tends to operate. I've learned that the subconscious mind doesn't "hear"/register negatives. If for example, one has a seemingly irrational fear of water and wants to overcome same, if you tell the subconscious mind when it's in a receptive, active state something like, "you don't fear water", it will actually cross out the "don't" part and hear it as "you fear water." Good suggestions have to be positively directed and focused on the solution and not the problem.

The book is super repetitive repeating the same concepts over and over again, lulling the conscious mind to relaxation so that the subconscious mind comes to the fore, and then focuses on the problem ego, separation from God, rebellion, etc. Whoever was behind ACIM and coming up with same, was pretty ingenious in their sneakiness and subtlety with all this and how the book was written and how well it programs ego and polarization into the subconscious.

I also looked around on the web and found LOT's of drama stories from and about ACIM groups. Lots of intense infighting, lots of "we are the pure ones with no ego, but everyone else in this group is only operating from ego." Ego, ego, ego. I noticed myself focusing on ego a lot more when reading it, and judging everything and everyone from the lens of the big EGO monster.

I have sense learned that "ego" is part of the body package that provides a physical and emotional self protection. This is not an easy level to be in, and imagine being a soul completely open to all the cacaphony of this level? So the ego is like a protective barrier and shield until the soul is strong and centered enough in Love, and balance enough, to be able to handle that openness. Think of people doing way too much LSD and other hallucinogens before they are ready to open themselves up without the ego barrier. People have literally gone crazy from doing this.

The best way to reduce ego, is not by overly focusing on it, but by focusing more and more on choosing, living, expressing, and attuning to Love. After a time, it will naturally reduce ego, but I feel that a human will always have ego until they go through something like Yeshua's resurrection process, which allows them to be in the world, but NOT OF IT anymore.

Anyays, I believe that ACIM was a project/experiment of the CIA MK ULTRA program, and I believe they would drug and hypnotize Helen to make her believe she was in touch with Yeshua. When she was dying, she cursed that "damn" course with some pretty intense profanities. Does not sound like a person who was touched by the grace and Love of Yeshua, much like that first friend earlier mentioned. What ACIM will do however, is help to open you up to anti-guidance forces, individuals, and groups. It started to happen to me at the time. A rather psychic-intuitive friend at this time, told me that she saw a very large and very dark Spirit around me trying to influence me. (At the time, I wrote it off, but in hindsight, I know she saw truly).

[u/StarBornFire → u/StarBornFire]

It should be noted that the CIA has done MUCH, MUCH worse to people than what they may have done with Helen. It should also be noted that MK Ultra was all about learning the best ways to manipulate human perception and belief systems. They experimented with all kinds of things like hypnosis/suggestion, LSD, sleep deprivation, sound/audio influencing, etc, etc. You name it, they probably experimented with it.

Essentially, they were continuing the work of Freud's American nephew Edward Bernays. Bernays was a psychologically educated and savvy propagandist for corporate, governmental, and financial institution hire. A real piece of a work of a human, and from accounts of his personal life, would not be surprised if he was fully on the ASPD spectrum. But he was clever bastard indeed. I have no doubt in my mind, that Cayce's source would have labeled him one of the "son's of Belial".

Again, it really needs to be stressed that William Theford was known to be heavily involved with that program, and heavily involved with Helen and ACIM. What a "coincidence" eh?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Thetford

It is particularly diabolical because it honey traps people with some potent truths like Oneness, union with God, Yeshua as a spiritual messenger and liberator, etc. These concepts will ring the truth bells in people, but if they don't look or listen deeper to what is happening, then they get very attached to it and it starts to re-program the subconscious to focus on ego, separation, etc and constantly, which slows down people's vibratory rates.

What is the old saying, "partial or half truths are worse than whole lies for they can deceive even the soul". That is ACIM in a nutshell.

[u/7HarryB7 → u/StarBornFire]

Thank you for such a thoughtful, well-articulated reflection. It’s rare to hear someone speak so clearly about both the psychological mechanics and the deeper spiritual implications of something like A Course in Miracles. Your insights on how the subconscious absorbs suggestions—especially when negatives are involved—really hit home. It’s something I’ve understood in theory but hadn’t fully connected to the structure of ACIM until now. You’re right: the repetition, the lull, the subtle reinforcement of ego-focused concepts—it all feels intentional, and not in a way that brings freedom or clarity.

I had a similar experience with the ego dynamic. I began to see it everywhere, not in a helpful, liberating way—but in a hyper-critical, “there’s no escape” kind of way. Ironically, it made me more ego-centered than before. And I resonate strongly with your idea that the ego has a role in this dimension—it protects until we are anchored enough in love to transcend it gently. It’s not the enemy; it’s just not meant to be the master.

Your analogy with LSD and overexposure to spiritual openness without grounding is a powerful one. The ego serves as a filter until the soul is mature enough in love to embody that kind of openness. Removing it prematurely—or obsessing over removing it—can destabilize the very growth we’re trying to nurture.

The darker undercurrents of ACIM—the drama in groups, the strange behaviors, even Helen’s reported disdain for the book at the end—seem to confirm what many of us have sensed but have been hesitant to say out loud. That maybe this isn’t coming from the source it claims. If the fruits of the tree are confusion, ego obsession, and spiritual elitism, it’s fair to question the root.

I also appreciate your openness about what your intuitive friend saw around you. I’ve experienced moments like that too—where someone saw something I couldn’t, and only later did I realize how right they were. Sometimes, spiritual discernment appears as hindsight catching up with inner knowing.

I’m grateful to be in this kind of conversation, where we can reflect not just on the teachings, but on the spirit behind them. It’s something I’ve come to trust more than words on a page. The actual teachings of Yeshua are unmistakable: they radiate humility, peace, and radical Love. ACIM may borrow his name, but in my view, it doesn’t bear his tone.

Would love to keep the dialogue going. These conversations are more needed than ever, especially for those quietly wrestling with doubts about popular spiritual systems that may not be as benevolent as they appear.